Title: Tarot
Author: Morgana
Author’s Email: morganalebeau@yahoo.com
Web page: http://www.paranoid.nl/avalon
Main pairings: Pansea/Skye, Tarot/Lunar
Mentioned pairings: Azriel/Aleeme,
Snake/Cobweb, and Flick/Ulaume.
Rating: NC-17
Summary: Paran takes Aleeme and Ponclast’s harling
to Lisia and Tarot starts shaping his own destiny.
Disclaimer: Not mine. No
copyright infringement is intended. All characters belong to Storm Constantine.
Warning: AU of course.
Spoiler warning: Set after book 6.
Beta read by DA, thanks sweetie!
All remaining mistakes are mine.
Tarot
Paran shivered
with disgust and tried to increase the distance between him and the harling he
was taking care of. Cobweb had ordered him to take the harling to Lisia at the
The harling sat
in front of him on the sedu’s back and Paran tried to
keep his hold on the child as loose as possible since he loathed touching the
abomination.
The harling was
the result of Ponclast raping a helpless Aleeme, forcing him to host his pearl.
General Aldebaran had told him how Ponclast had viciously abused Aleeme and had
even forced Azriel to watch. As a result, Azriel and Aleeme had lost their minds,
but Gelaming healers were doing their best to reclaim them.
The first time
he had laid eyes on the harling, he had recoiled in disgust and with the
knowledge that the child was Ponclast's as well. The harling was ugly. There
was no other way to describe his exterior *and* interior. His head was too big,
the body emaciated, and the feline green eyes had seemed to stare right into
his soul. His discomfort had grown the moment the harling had been entrusted to
him. He had almost asked the General to reconsider, but in the end, he had
remained quiet and reminded himself that this was just another order he had to
carry out.
Long, raven
hair peeked out from beneath the hood which Paran had pulled over the harling’s
head so he didn’t have to look at him. He understood why Cobweb didn’t want the
harling at Forever since he didn’t want the abomination close to him either. In
a way, he pitied Lisia, who didn’t know yet that he was going to be the
harling’s new caretaker.
~~~
Pansea was
about to panic. Paran had arrived unexpectedly and had demanded to speak with
Lisia at once. Pansea had shown the officer into a room and had then set out on
a search for Lisia. It was
“Lis! Wait for me!” Pansea caught sight of
the hostling and started to run. He was short of breath by the time he arrived
at Lisia’s side. The hostling gave him a worried look and the blond strand that
streaked his brown hair swept into Lisia’s face. The hostling immediately
tucked it behind an ear as Pansea grabbed hold of the hostling’s sleeve. “You
need to come with me!”
Lisia wanted to
calm Pansea, but then realized his aide was stressed for a reason. He fell into
step beside the young har and asked, “What has happened?”
“Paran arrived with
a harling. Oh Lis, the poor harling looks malnourished! He is emaciated and his
eyes… You need to see him now!” Pansea was convinced that Lisia could help the
harling. Lisia was his *hero* after all.
Lisia frowned.
Why would Paran bring a harling to him? He realized there was a hidden story
and probably a hidden agenda and he was determined to find out what it was.
~~~
“Sit there and
don’t move!” Paran wanted to leave as quickly as possible. The harling was
staring at him and shivers ran down his spine. The large, all-seeing eyes made
his skin crawl.
Lisia entered
the room with Pansea in tow. His first look was for the harling. Pansea had
sounded alarmed and one look at the child proved that his aide hadn’t
exaggerated. The harling looked like death warmed over. “Who is this?”
Paran sighed in
relief. Since Lisia had arrived he was no longer responsible for the monster.
“I need to talk to you in private, Lisia.” He looked pointedly at Pansea and
the young har started to move toward the doorway.
“I will be back
later,” Pansea said after smiling at the intimidated-looking harling. He closed
the door behind them and left Lisia and Paran to their conversation.
Lisia covered
the distance between him and the harling and lowered himself onto his heels.
“Hello. Who are you?” The harling cocked his head, but didn’t answer him. Although
aware and intelligent, the harling didn’t seem to understand the question.
“He has no
name,” Paran said and shivered. Involuntarily, he pulled the fabric of his coat
closer around his frame. “How much do you know of what happened in Fulminir?”
Lisia shrugged
his shoulders in reply to Paran’s question. He remained focused on the
distressed harling instead. The child radiated fear and was ready to bolt from
the room. Lisia wanted to prevent that from happening. “Not much.” Very slowly
and carefully, he raised a hand and rested it on the harling’s head, patting
the dark hair.
“Ponclast
fathered a pearl with pelki. You are looking at the
result right now.”
Lisia’s eyes
widened and he looked at Paran over his shoulder. “You shouldn’t speak like
that in his presence!” He had felt the harling’s distress increase when Paran
had made that revelation. “He is only a harling!” The child couldn’t be much
older than three, maybe four months.
“He is a
monster,” Paran replied and glared at the harling. “Aleeme birthed the pearl
against his wish. He was forced to host it. It would have been best for the
*harling* if he had died in that room, like the second pearl that had almost
killed Aleeme.”
Lisia glared at
Paran. “This harling is no monster! How can you say such a thing?” He didn’t
sense any evil where the child was concerned. He only sensed fear, loneliness,
and confusion.
“You will find
out yourself once you've spent time with him. He is a monster, Lis. Don’t let
him fool you.” Paran made his way over to the doorway. “Cobweb wants you to
raise him.”
Lisia’s eyebrow
arched an eyebrow as he petted the harling’s hair. Although the child looked
scared, the harling allowed the petting. “Cobweb should raise the harling
himself.” He didn’t approve of Cobweb sending the harling to him.
“Cobweb doesn’t
want that monstrosity at Forever and I can’t blame him. That *harling* gives me
the creeps.” Paran opened the door and was surprised to find a househar
blocking the corridor. The har carried a tray which held tea, water, and
sandwiches. “He is all yours, Lis, and by Ag, I don’t envy you.” He shuddered
and marched down the corridor, eager to put more distance between him and
Ponclast’s legacy.
Lisia gestured
for the househar to enter and place the tray on the floor next to him. “Fetch
Pansea for me, will you?” he asked the househar who left to find the young har.
Lisia focused
on the harling, whose gaze had shifted from the hostling’s face to the tray
holding the food. “You must be hungry.” Lisia caught the child shivering and
picked up a blanket from a nearby couch and wrapped it around the harling’s
shoulders. The child’s heritage didn’t matter to him since he had raised many
harlings who weren’t his own. He would love this child too. He picked up a
sandwich and expected the harling to take hold of it, but the large eyes simply
continued to stare at him while the harling’s hands didn’t move.
“I know you’re
hungry.” Lisia managed to find a hand beneath the fabric and placed the
sandwich into the child’s hand. “You need to eat.” He poured a cup of tea and
blew onto the surface so it would cool down. He wanted to get something warm
into the child.
The harling
turned his head toward him and studied him. Lisia was under the impression that
the harling was trying to read him telepathically, but couldn’t be sure. A
harling that young shouldn’t have such abilities yet. He focused on feeding the
child instead and guided the hand with the sandwich in it to the child’s mouth.
“Eat.”
The teeth that were
revealed when the harling took a bite out of the sandwich were green and black.
Lisia sighed and brushed the long dirty hair away from the harling’s face. “We
need to clean you up, little one.” And he needed to name the harling. Lisia
watched the harling eat one sandwich and then followed the direction of the
hungry gaze to the rest of the food. Realizing the child wouldn’t take another
sandwich out of his own accord, Lisia placed another one in the harling’s hand.
“Eat as much as you want.” The harling needed to do a lot of eating if he ever
wanted to rid himself of his emaciated look. “And try some tea.” He helped the
harling sip the tea. Quickly, he caught the child when the harling swayed on
his feet. The child ended up sitting on the floor and continued to munch
happily.
At that moment,
Pansea entered the room and the young har immediately joined the hostling. “He
doesn’t look well.”
Lisia drew in a
deep breath. “He was rescued from Ponclast’s stronghold. We can only guess what
horrors he witnessed.” Paran had mentioned that Ponclast had raped Aleeme and
Lisia wondered just how much the harling had seen. “What did you see with those
large eyes?” Maybe one day he would venture into the child’s mind to find out,
but for the moment, he needed to concentrate on the harling’s needs. “He is
staying with me, Pansea.” Lisia’s first thought had been to ask Pansea to take
the harling in, but the young har lacked the necessary experience to deal with
a harling who had been damaged like this.
“That would be
best.” Pansea nodded. He gave the harling another sandwich and after staring at
the food for a moment, the child started to eat again. “He is famished.” He was
convinced that they would find bones sticking out once they removed the ragged
clothes the harling was wearing.
“He looks quite
famished, yes.” But Lisia knew the harling’s hunger was more than just for
food. What the child really needed was someone who wanted to love and take care
of him. It was quite obvious that Lisia was going to be that har. For years, he
had taken care of hundreds of harlings. He could easily take care of this one
too. “I am Lisia,” he introduced himself to the harling. “But you can also call
me Lis.” Could the harling talk? Did he possess that skill? How badly damaged
was the child? “And this is Pansea, a very good friend of mine. What’s your
name, little one?”
Neither Lisia
nor Pansea expected the harling to answer them, but a voice as clear and sharp
as glass cut through the room. “I am Tarot,” the harling said and stared at
them in wondrous curiosity. He didn’t sense any hatred coming from these hara.
Paran had hated him, he knew that. And so had all the other hara he had been
with since he had left his hostling’s room.
Lisia smiled
happily. “That’s a pretty name,” he commented, hoping to make the harling feel
good about himself.
Tarot busied
himself with sipping the rest of his tea and then waited for the adults to take
the initiative again since he didn’t know how to act. Except for Ponclast, who
had come to his hostling’s rooms a few times to torture Azriel and Aleeme, and
Paran, who hated him, he didn’t have much experience dealing with hara. Lisia’s
attitude towards him puzzled him.
“I want you to
eat some more and then we will take you to my rooms so we can clean you up. You
need a bath, little one.”
A
bath? Tarot frowned.
He had never bathed before.
~~~
Lisia and
Pansea could tell that it took a lot of effort for Tarot to remain in place and
not run away once their hands started to pry the rags from the harling’s body.
Tarot looked at them in distress and even started to yelp helplessly. Lisia
cringed when the full extent of the abuse Ponclast had inflicted on the harling
became evident. The harling was little more than skin and bones and beneath the
grime, bruises colored Tarot’s body. “What happened?” he asked as he helped
Pansea clean the harling up.
Tarot didn’t
reply. He simply continued to whimper pitifully and squirmed in their hold when
they brushed his teeth. He wasn’t trying to get away from them exactly. He was
merely trying to protect himself from getting hurt again. Since Ponclast had
beaten and kicked him in the past, he expected Lisia and Pansea to treat him in
a similar way.
“We won’t hurt
you,” Pansea murmured once it became clear that Tarot wasn’t going to answer
Lisia’s question. “We want to help.” Pansea exchanged a worried look with
Lisia. The harling didn’t have any mental defenses and Pansea saw images in
Tarot’s mind of Ponclast kicking and scolding the harling without prying.
Lisia had
witnessed the same horrendous scene. Apparently Ponclast had hated the sight of
his son. Getting Aleeme with pearl had just been Ponclast’s way to get back at
Swift. Ponclast had made Azriel watch him rape Aleeme and had even forced
Swift’s son to witness Aleeme birthing the pearl. Tarot had meant nothing to
him. The harling had just been another object to vent his anger on.
“Hush now,
everything will be alright.” Lisia felt grateful for the caste training which
he had recently absorbed. Chrysm had been so kind as to set him up with a
teacher and Lisia could now easily reach into the harling’s mind and calm him
down. “You will be fine.” That they had found Tarot so quickly had probably
been the harling’s salvation. Had Tarot been locked up any longer in that room
while witnessing Ponclast torture Azriel and his hostling, the child would have
ended up even more damaged. He was damaged enough as he was.
Tarot calmed
and allowed them to wash his hair as well. He let them do as they wanted and
endured it all. But in reality he just wanted to curl up in the corner of a
room and hide from the world.
~~~
Tarot stared in
disbelief at the bed covered with warm blankets and even a stuffed toy. He knew
what a stuffed toy was and why harlings were given them, but since he had never
had one it didn’t occur to him to hug it. He waited for Lisia to tell him what
to do and just hugged his waist and rocked slightly in the meantime.
Lisia started
to realize how much time, love, and effort it would take for Tarot to become a
‘normal’ harling again and he wondered if he was the right har for the job. But
Cobweb, the coward, had sent the harling to
Tarot blinked.
He didn’t know if he was tired. He had always felt like this and he didn’t know
if this was tired.
“Let’s find
out.” Lisia sat down on the bed and patted the space next to him. “The bed is
soft.” Tarot however continued to stare at him. He had to be more explicit.
“Hop on.” Lisia patted the mattress again and then pushed down the covers.
Cautiously
Tarot approached. He wasn’t sure what Lisia wanted him to do. In the end, the
hostling reached for him and lifted him onto the bed. Tarot allowed it and
stared at the har with big eyes. What would happen now?
“Lie down. You
can’t possibly sleep sitting up like that.”
Tarot curled up
on his side and watched Lisia intently. Everything was so different since he
had arrived at this place. It was the first time in his short life that he
wasn’t surrounded by violence and hatred and he had to get used to the feeling.
Lisia covered him with the blanket and Tarot slid a hand beneath the pillow.
“Why don’t you
close your eyes and try to sleep? All harlings need to rest, you know.” Lisia
stroked the now soft and shiny hair. At first he had thought Tarot possessed an
ebony mane, but had realized that the hair consisted of black and brown
strands, giving the harling an interesting appearance. He wished Tarot would
say something, anything, but the harling did nothing but stare at him. “You are
safe here. Nohar will hurt you. You are in my care now.”
Lisia flinched
as he picked up more violent images depicting Ponclast in Tarot’s mind. The
harling had seen Ponclast force himself on Aleeme. Tarot, searching for some
sort of protection, had crawled over to Azriel, but the har had been too far gone
already to register the harling’s needs. Lisia felt physically sick when he
realized what atrocities Ponclast had committed where Azriel and Aleeme were
concerned. “That’s in the past,” he said and stretched out beside the harling.
Tarot didn’t
know what to make of Lisia’s comment. What was in the past?
Lisia gently
probed the harling’s thoughts and emotions. He found it worrying that Tarot
spoke so little, but that might have to do with the fact that he had never had
a har to talk to. Azriel and Aleeme had been too far gone to care for the
harling and Ponclast had only bullied Tarot. Later, with Paran, the officer had
kept his barriers tightly in place so he wouldn’t accidentally make contact
with the ‘monster’ as he had called Tarot. It was beyond Lisia how anyone could
think of Tarot as a freak. All he saw was a harling who desperately needed a
hostling.
“Things will
start to make sense shortly. I promise, Tarot.” Lisia wasn’t certain the
harling would allow it, but he started to pull the child closer until Tarot was
safely nestled against him. “Close your eyes and sleep, little one.”
Tarot was
growing sleepy because of the relaxed atmosphere. Lisia’s presence was soothing
and he had never experienced anything like it before. His eyes started to
close, but he still tried to stay awake as long as he could so he could savor
the moment. Back in that filthy dark room he had wanted his hostling to hold
him close and rock and soothe him, but Aleeme’s mind had fled to a safe place
and the har hadn’t responded to his pleading. In the end, Tarot had just given
up.
A lump of
emotions formed in Lisia’s throat when he caught that particular sentiment in
Tarot’s mind. Paran and Cobweb might not believe Tarot capable of feelings, but
the harling was. He had just suffered too much in his young life for him to be
able to deal with the fall out. “Sleep, Tarot. Sleep.”
He kept up the murmuring and in the end, the harling
lost the fight to stay awake and drifted off into sleep.
Once Tarot was
asleep, Lisia released the tears he had been holding back. They had wronged the
harling. Paran, Cobweb, and all the other hara who could have
made a difference. They should have realized that the harling was just
another victim and shouldn’t have been made to pay for Ponclast’s crimes. This
harling needed all the love he could possibly get and Lisia was determined to
make sure Tarot got it.
~~~
Sometime during
the night Pansea visited with Lisia. The young har sat on the edge of the bed
and watched Tarot sleep. The harling looked too small, vulnerable, and thin for
his age. They would spend the next months, maybe even years, rendering that
condition. “Lis? Can I help too?”
Continuing to
pet Tarot’s hair in his sleep, Lisia searched Pansea’s eyes. He knew that the
young har was eager to become a hostling because of his upbringing and so far,
Lisia had managed to keep him back from creating a pearl. Maybe involving
Pansea in Tarot’s healing process would help Pansea see what a big responsibility
having his own harling was. “Tarot will need a hostling and a father, Pansea.”
Pansea
swallowed hard. “Sadly enough I don’t have much experience being either.”
Lisia smiled
encouragingly at Pansea. “You have been caring for harlings your entire life,
Pansea. How can you say such a thing?”
Pansea blushed
at the unexpected compliment. “Does that mean you would consider letting me
play a part in his life?”
“Pansea, before
you offer to do such a thing, I want you to realize what you are getting
yourself into. This harling will need us for many years. He will need one of us
close at all times. You might not be able to spend as much time with the other
hara and harlings as you did. You will have to focus on Tarot. I am afraid that
if we don’t make him our priority, we will lose him. You saw the things he
witnessed. Being subjected to such vile things can do strange things to him.”
Pansea
swallowed nervously. “I can’t understand why his hostling didn’t want him.”
“You saw the
state his hostling was in,” Lisia replied. “Aleeme was more dead than alive.”
He understood Pansea though. The young har had been raised to attain a singular
goal, namely to host pearls. “I am angry with Cobweb though. He should know
better than to turn his back on a harling.”
“Maybe he
wasn’t thinking straight after what had happened to his high har and Aleeme?”
Pansea went back into his memory and accessed the images again which he had
seen in Tarot’s mind. The situation Azriel and Aleeme had been in had been
extreme.
Lisia’s jaw set
grimly. “Oh, I plan on confronting him with Tarot one day.” Cobweb should have
known better than to abandon a harling no matter how he had come into the
world. “But we will worry about that later. Will you make sure a fine breakfast
awaits Tarot when he wakes up? And see if you can arrange for some clothes that
fit him.”
Pansea rose
from the bed. “Lis, thank you for giving me this chance.”
“Just don’t
reconsider somewhere down the road, Pansea. Tarot will cause trouble at one
time or another.” That was inevitable. The harling had already lived through
too much horror and it had affected him.
“I will not let
you down.” Pansea gave Lisia a look full of resolution. “I will be there for
him come what may.”
~~~
Tarot woke up
screaming the next morning. In his mind, he was back in that filthy little room
and Ponclast had returned to torment Aleeme. Like before, Tarot had tried to
distract Ponclast from his hostling, but it never worked. Ponclast had always
been focused on Aleeme and had never given Tarot a second glance, but rather a
hard kick.
“No, get away
from him! Leave him alone!” Tarot screamed and fought the blankets which had
been tucked around his form. “Leave him alone!” With his tiny fists he started
to beat onto the chest of the har close to him. In his thoughts, it was
Ponclast.
However, in
reality, it was Lisia. Since Tarot’s blows had little impact on the hostling,
he allowed for the harling to exert himself and once
Tarot was exhausted, he brushed the hair out of the tear-streaked face. “It is
me, Lis.” His voice trembled for he had only just realized that Tarot had
received many bruises when he had tried to defend Aleeme. “It is only me.”
Tarot, drained
from fighting his imaginary foe, sobbed as he recognized Lisia. He had been convinced
that it had been Ponclast close to him! “He would hurt him,” he whispered and
closed his eyes. “He hurt them both.”
“And he hurt
you.” Lisia drew in a deep, steadying breath. “You were a brave harling trying
to distract Ponclast like that.” The eyes opened again and Lisia felt a deep
sympathy when he saw the pain in them.
“My hostling
couldn’t defend himself... I had to try… I didn’t want
that har to hurt them!” They had been like lifeless statues, Azriel and Aleeme,
and yet, Tarot had sensed emotions in them. Their hurt had mirrored his own. Tarot wiped at his eyes and tried to regulate his
breathing again. “Will I ever see them again? Are they alive?” He had been too
afraid to ask Paran that question. The officer had been distant and had loathed
the sight of him.
Lisia nodded.
“They are alive. Azriel and your hostling have been taken to Immanion. The
healers there will do their best to heal them.” Hurt shone from deep within
those green eyes and Lisia wanted to take it away and make it all better, but
he couldn’t. There was no instant cure for their hurts. He had to take small
steps with Tarot and let the healers work on Azriel and Aleeme. “I don’t know
if you will ever see them again,” he said honestly. “But I hope you will.”
Tears formed all over again in Tarot’s eyes and Lisia wanted to kiss them away,
but he didn’t, uncertain of the harling’s reaction to such a gesture. “In the
meantime, you will stay with Pansea and me.”
Tarot would
have preferred to see his hostling again, but Lisia had been quite clear that it
wasn’t an option. Azriel and Aleeme were out of his reach, maybe forever. He
didn’t know what his life would be like with Lisia, but it couldn’t be worse
than the life he had known in Fulminir!
~~~
Tarot didn’t
understand why Lisia and Pansea worried about his appearance that much. The two
hara were helping him get dressed and Tarot was amazed at how soft the material
felt against his skin. In the end, Pansea gave him a pleased smile and Tarot
wondered if he was supposed to smile back. He liked wearing clothes, but at the
same time he felt out of place. Lisia, who was on his heels in front of him,
patted his hair again. Tarot still didn’t understand why the hostling kept
doing that.
“I want you to
go with Pansea. He will take you to the kitchen where you will have breakfast.”
He judged it best to keep Tarot apart from the other harlings since he doubted
Tarot had the necessary skills to interact with them. It was best to limit
Tarot’s contact to Pansea and himself. “I want you to eat as much as you can.
You are too skinny, little one.”
The harling’s
body wasn’t developing as it should and was making the head appear too big for
the scrawny torso. “Now go.”
Pansea took Tarot's
hand into his and Tarot walked alongside the young har as they made their way
into the corridor. It was nice to have someone around who cared about him,
although he wasn’t quite sure how he should react to their tender, loving care.
Hara had never treated him nicely before.
~~~
Pansea had to urge
Tarot into eating more. The harling looked at the older har each time before he
put some food into his mouth as if he expected Pansea to take it away again.
Pansea reminded himself to be patient. Tarot had seen many vile things during
his time in Fulminir and it would take the child time to trust him.
~~~
Belly full, Tarot
felt warm as Pansea pulled him onto his lap to hold and rock him. The har was
telling him a story, but Tarot wasn’t really listening. His eyes were beginning
to close. Pansea had a pleasant voice and listening to the fairy tale made him
sleepy.
Slowly rocking
the harling, Pansea felt pleased when Tarot rested his head against his chest.
He patted the dark hair and embraced Tarot loosely. “Do you like living here?”
Pansea didn’t really expect an answer since Tarot hadn’t spoken much since his
arrival.
Tarot however
felt relaxed enough to reply. Still sleepy and feeling pleasantly sated after
eating a good breakfast, he whispered, “I do. It’s much better here.”
Pansea
involuntarily sucked in his breath, pleased with the fact that Tarot felt
comfortable enough to talk to him. “Lis and I like you. We would like to adopt
you. Then you would be our harling.” Tarot moved his head and turned in the
embrace to stare at him. “Did I say something wrong?” Pansea asked.
“Does my
hostling not want me then?” Tarot's bottom lip quivered and he fought hard to
keep his tears from falling.
Pansea’s heart
went out to the harling. “Your hostling is not well at the moment. He needs
healing and it will take him a long time to recover, if he recovers that is.
Lis and I would like to take care of you while your hostling recovers.” Part of
it was a white lie. It was very unlikely that Aleeme would ever want to take
care of his harling.
“I love him,”
Tarot said and this time the tears fell. They flowed down his cheeks and landed
on Pansea’s tunic. “I tried to protect him. Is that the reason why he doesn’t
want me? Because I failed him?”
Pansea tried to
tread carefully when he answered, “You are a harling, Tarot. You can’t possibly
protect a har from an attacker. What happened to your hostling wasn’t your
fault.” He carefully guided Tarot’s head to his shoulder and held the harling
tight. “You need to heal too. Let Lis and me help.”
Tarot continued
to cry softly and Pansea rocked him. They sat like that for a long time before
Lisia finally found them.
Lisia sensed
the harling’s emotional turmoil and touched Pansea’s mind to find out what had
happened. Pansea shared their conversation with him and Lisia sighed. It was apparent
that Tarot loved Aleeme greatly, but unfortunately for the harling, neither
Ulaume nor Cobweb were inclined to take him in. “Tarot,” he said and sat on his
heels in front of them.
Tarot turned in
the embrace and wiped at his face. Looking at Lisia, he waited for the har to
speak again. He didn’t know what to say since too many emotions were coursing
through him. Lisia opened his arms and Tarot slid off of Pansea’s knees. Lisia
caught him and hugged him.
“We will take
care of you,” Lisia promised. “You are our harling now.” He searched Tarot’s
eyes. “That doesn’t mean you have to stop loving Aleeme. He is your hostling
and of course you love him. We would never ask that of you.”
Raising his
arms, Tarot shyly wrapped them about Lisia. “I don’t know what to say.”
“You don’t have
to say a thing.” Lisia hugged the harling tighter and exchanged a pleased look
with Pansea. They had gotten through to Tarot.
~~~
Tarot spent the
rest of the day in Pansea’s company since Lisia had to go back to his office
and work on their food stock inventories. Pansea showed him about
Once it was
time for dinner, Pansea took Tarot to Lisia’s rooms. The hostling was already
waiting for them and dinner had been placed out on his desk.
Tarot’s eyes
widened. Was he going to eat again? Lisia caught that thought and smiled
encouragingly. “Three meals a day, Tarot. You need to
gain some weight.” Lisia helped Tarot climb onto a chair and then waited for
Pansea to seat himself. He then piled food onto Tarot’s plate and gestured for
the harling to start eating, giving the example himself by starting on his
soup.
Pansea started
to eat as well and eventually Tarot tried the soup. Tarot kept watching them
and wondered about the two hara. “It is different here,” he said eventually,
needing to vent his thoughts. “In that dark room there was no food or water…” But
now he was eating three meals a day!
“What you
experienced wasn’t a normal way of life. What Ponclast did was monstrous. Hara
normally are not like that.” Lisia smiled sadly at Tarot. “Nohar will ever beat
or kick you again, Tarot. Nohar will ever again bully you. You are among
friends now.”
Tarot nodded.
He sensed that both Lisia and Pansea were sincere. And although he liked them,
he wished his hostling was there as well.
~~~
Tarot couldn’t
believe it. Was he going to take another bath? Lisia had filled up the bathtub
and had even added scented bath oil to the water.
“Time
for your bath, Tarot.”
Lisia pushed up his sleeves and advanced on the harling to undress him. That
Tarot looked dazed didn’t register with Lisia at first. Only once he had
removed the harling’s clothes and saw how tense the body was did he look up and
see the expression in Tarot’s eyes. What was wrong? Lisia involuntarily probed
the harling’s mind to find out.
/Oh no…/ Tarot
was suffering from a flashback. In his mind, Ponclast was raping Aleeme all
over again. Lisia awkwardly patted Tarot’s head and then pulled him into an
embrace. At the same time, he soothed the troubled harling and forced the
images to dim in Tarot’s mind until they eventually vanished. “You shouldn’t
have witnessed that.” With a cry, Tarot collapsed against him. Rocking him, Lisia
hugged the harling until Tarot had finally calmed down. “You will never have to
witness that again. You are safe now and so is your hostling.”
Tarot clung to
Lisia for a long time, but eventually pushed himself away from the hostling.
“Can you make me forget?”
Lisia wasn’t
sure he could. Although he had received some caste training, his education was
still lacking. “I can try.” Focusing on the terrible images in Tarot’s mind, he
managed to take the vicious sting out of them. “I am sorry. I can’t take them
completely away.”
But the pain
was bearable now. Tarot could deal with those memories since Lisia had weakened
them. He stared at Lisia for another minute and then bowed his head. He was
tired.
“Let’s do
this.” Lisia wanted the bathing over with so he could tuck Tarot into bed to
sleep. Originally he had wanted to drag the bathing time out with splashing
games, but the happy mood was gone. Both of them felt oppressed by what Tarot
had witnessed Ponclast do.
Lisia made
quick work of cleaning Tarot up and then wrapped the harling in warm towels.
After drying Tarot's skin and hair, he picked Tarot up and carried him over to
the bed. It was a strange sight to see Pansea already curled up there, but they
had both agreed that it would be best if Pansea stayed close for Tarot’s sake.
He placed a drowsy Tarot on the bed and the harling instantly moved closer to
Pansea, who opened his arms to hold him.
Pansea tucked
Tarot’s head against his shoulder and a blanket around their forms. He felt
honored that Tarot trusted them enough to watch over him.
TBC
Part
2
“How long can
we keep this up?” Pansea looked at Lisia for an answer. “Do you plan to watch
him twenty four hours a day?”
“I told you
that this wouldn’t be easy,” Lisia replied and gave Pansea a look filled with
understanding. Tarot had been with them for two months now and, while the
harling was improving, he still needed around-the-clock attention. “I warned
you.”
Pansea bowed
his head. When he had offered to care for Tarot, he hadn’t really realized how
demanding the job would be. But looking at the harling who was asleep on his
lap showed him it was worthwhile. Tarot had become more balanced and was even
trying to connect with the other harlings. Lisia and Pansea expected Tarot to
be able to mingle with other harlings in a few weeks. The progress the harling
was making was amazing, but it also came at a cost. Minding Tarot twenty four
seven was taking its toll on them.
“I always
wanted a harling of my own,” Pansea said and stroked Tarot’s hair. “But I never
realized just how big a responsibility a child is.”
Lisia smiled.
His plan was working. He had wanted to make Pansea see just that. “Harlings are
a treasure, Pansea, but you should go into it with your eyes wide open and
fully realizing how demanding they are.”
Tarot woke up
and blinked. He rubbed the remaining sleep from his eyes and pushed himself
upright. Balancing on Pansea’s knee, he looked about. It had been a few nights since
he had woken without having had any nightmares. Lisia and Pansea’s presence had
a soothing effect on him. “Morning,” he mumbled. He felt more comfortable
addressing them, but he would never turn into a chatterbox.
“Good
afternoon, Tarot,” Lisia replied and smiled at the harling. “You took a long
afternoon nap on Pansea’s lap. It is almost time for dinner.” It warmed Lisia’s
heart to see that Tarot was gaining weight. The head didn’t look so big anymore
since the rest of the body was developing as well. The face was also filling
out nicely, adding a soft touch to the harling’s features. And then there was
the hair. It had started to change. Already dark-brown, it had turned
pitch-black the last two months and at times Lisia swore it possessed a life of
its own. Just the other day it had curled itself around his wrist when Lisia
had wanted to leave.
“Dinner? Again?” Tarot
was still trying to get used to the idea of eating all the time. The clothes
which he had worn the first day no longer fit him. Lisia had given him a new
outfit only the other day.
“Yes,
again.” Pansea put
Tarot on the floor and then rose from the chair. He hadn’t been able to move
about since Tarot had used his lap as a bed for the last few hours.
Lisia left his
chair behind his desk and lowered himself onto his heels in front of Tarot. “Are
you hungry?”
Tarot
considered the question. “A little bit.” He took Lisia’s hand in his and
followed the hostling to the rooms the three of them shared these days. “Are
you, Lis?”
Lisia grinned.
It was encouraging that Tarot was asking him in turn. “Actually, I am. And I am
sure Pansea is hungry too.” Pansea took Tarot’s other hand in his and the three
of them made their way over to the living area. The table there had been set
and the soup had been served.
Observing Tarot
closely, Pansea smiled when the harling started to eat right away. That was one
thing that had definitely changed the last month. Tarot was no longer looking
to them for permission to eat. The harling was slowly getting used to his
freedom and his changed life.
~~~
That night,
Tarot went to sleep in Lisia’s arms. Pansea was also in bed with them, but had
rolled away from them sometime during the night and was on his side facing
away. Tarot’s dreams were wild that night and, while they didn’t feature
Ponclast, Tarot did see his hostling’s tormented expression over and over
again. Aleeme screamed in his dreams and Tarot started awake with a scream of
his own that thundered through the silent bedroom.
“No…” Tarot
clung to Lisia. In his dreams Aleeme had stared at him with loathing and
reproach in his eyes, almost as if blaming the harling for the situation he was
in. “I tried to protect you!”
Both Lisia and
Pansea startled awake. Lisia immediately tightened his hold on the harling and
Pansea sat up to find out what was happening. It became clear to them that
Tarot had had a nightmare, which surprised them since the nightmares had left
the harling alone lately.
Lisia soothed
Tarot and rocked him. A look at the harling’s thoughts showed what the
nightmare had been about. “It wasn’t your fault that Aleeme was hurt, Tarot.
Please don’t think that.” Looking at Pansea, he requested, “Can you fetch some
warm milk for him?” It would help settle Tarot’s nerves. They had discovered
the soothing effect warm milk had on the harling the other night after he had
suffered from a similar nightmare.
Pansea left the
bed to fetch the milk and Lisia pushed himself into an upright position. Tarot
settled down on his lap and the harling wrapped his arms around Lisia’s torso. “Aleeme
is healing, Tarot, just like you are healing. You must believe that he is
getting better much like you are.” He rocked the harling slowly and tucked
Tarot’s head beneath his chin.
“I want to see
him!” Tarot sobbed against Lisia’s chest. “I want to see him and hold him and
talk to him!”
“I am sorry,
but that is not possible at the moment, but I can ask a friend for information
about Aleeme. He lives in Immanion too.” Paran might be able to supply him with
news about Aleeme.
“Would you do
that for me?” Tarot raised his tear-streaked face and looked pleadingly at
Lisia. “I worry about him.”
“I know you do and
that is very sweet of you.” Knowing that Aleeme might never want to see Tarot
hurt Lisia. Lisia wanted Aleeme to know what a precious harling the other har
had given life to. At that moment, Pansea returned with a mug filled with warm
milk and he slid onto the bed again. “Drink that,” Lisia ordered as Pansea
placed the mug at Tarot’s lips. “And stop worrying about Aleeme. He is in the
best care.”
Tarot sipped
some of the milk and it helped calm him down. “I just want my hostling, Lis.”
Lisia kissed the
crown of Tarot’s head. “I know that, sweet one, but sometimes what we want the
most is the one thing we can’t have.”
~~~
Tarot felt
excited. Lisia and Pansea had selected a handful of harlings he was going to be
allowed to meet and maybe even play with. During the last two months he had
watched them from afar. In the beginning he had felt no desire to join them in
their play, but that had changed during the last few weeks. Now he wanted to befriend
them. He impatiently shuffled his feet and studied the three harlings standing
near by.
Lisia smiled,
sensing Tarot’s eagerness for him to move on and introduce them. “Tarot, I want
you to meet these three harlings. This is Mist.” He gestured for the
fair-haired harling to approach and Lisia smiled when Mist offered to hug
Tarot. Tarot accepted and then drew back. Lisia had chosen the three harlings
on purpose because they possessed impressive social skills. They would know
instinctively how to handle a harling like Tarot.
“Hello Mist.”
Tarot smiled gingerly at the other harling and felt relieved when Mist returned
the smile.
“And this is
Onyx.” Lisia nodded in Onyx’s direction and the raven-haired harling reached
out to Tarot, taking his hand into his. So far, introductions were going well.
“Tarot, I also
want you to meet Lunar.” Lunar was the youngest and smallest of all four
harlings. Lunar’s hostling had birthed the pearl prematurely and Lunar was smaller
than the other harlings as a result.
Tarot seemed to
sense that and very carefully hugged the fair-haired harling, who was thinner
than he was. The blond hair, pale skin, and light-blue eyes gave Lunar a
slightly ghostly appearance, but Tarot instantly liked the other harling more
than he did Mist and Onyx.
“Why don’t the
four of you play over in that corner there?” Lisia had put books, games, and
other toys in the corner of the room so the harlings wouldn’t become bored. He
watched them make their way over there and smiled when he noticed that Tarot
was still holding Lunar’s hand. Their first meeting had gone better than he had
dared hope.
~~~
Pansea joined
them an hour later and smiled in pleasure at seeing the four harlings play a
game. “It looks like everything is going well.” Introducing Tarot to the other
three harlings had been something of a gamble since they hadn’t been sure the
harling knew how to interact with others. Tarot had never played with another
harling before.
“They are
getting along just fine.” Lisia presented Pansea with a cup of tea and added,
“Tarot has taken a shine to Lunar in particular. He is very protective of him.”
Tarot was seated close to Lunar and was watching the other harling’s movements
closely. At one time, Lunar had threatened to topple over when reaching for a
toy and Tarot had steadied him.
“He also wanted
to protect Aleeme. Maybe that’s why he has taken to Lunar, who is clearly the
smallest of them.” Pansea smiled at Tarot when the harling looked at him. “It
is good to see him play like that.”
“I think we can
give him a bit more freedom from now on.” Lisia sipped his tea. “We can let
them play unsupervised in a little bit.” Being away from them would do Tarot
good. Lisia didn’t want the harling to become dependant on them.
~~~
During the next
few days Tarot became good friends with Mist, Onyx, and especially Lunar.
Although they played games together most of the time, Tarot liked to play with Lunar best. Sometimes after Mist and Onyx had returned to
their caregivers, Tarot and Lunar would sit together and play. They didn’t talk
much. They simply enjoyed playing with the stuffed animals and giggled a lot.
Tarot had been searching for someone he could fuss over had found that person
in Lunar while Lunar thrived under all the attention he was getting from Tarot,
having found that special, protective friend he had always searched for.
Those facts
weren’t lost on Lisia and Pansea, who weren’t sure if they should encourage
this growing friendship or not, but events took place to sway them.
The four harlings
were playing near the pond. Several teachers and hostlings were also close by
watching over another group of ten harlings who were on a field trip examining
and cataloguing the flowers that grew close to the water. Pansea, enjoying a
quiet moment, had stretched out on the grass and every now and then checked on
the four harlings.
Tarot stayed
clear of the water and watched Lunar closely. The other harling seemed
fascinated with his reflection and was leaning in closer to see more of his
face. Mist and Onyx were watching a frog that had jumped out of the water and
weren’t paying Lunar any attention. Tarot saw it happen, but was too far away
to stop Lunar from toppling over into the pond.
Lunar was
scared and shocked at losing his footing and screamed, but then the water
closed over his head and he was sinking. His clothes dragged him deeper and the
surface became darker and darker. The sunlight was fading quickly and the
harling panicked. He couldn’t breath and was failing in his struggle to the
surface again. He was sinking fast and if nohar came to his rescue, he would
drown.
~~~
Pansea jolted
to his feet when he heard Lunar scream. A look about showed that the harling
had vanished from his view. Pansea grabbed the harling closest to him, Mist,
and shook him slightly. “Where’s Lunar?”
“In
the water!” Mist’s
bottom lip trembled and he pointed at the pond. “He fell in!”
Cursing softly,
Pansea started to run toward the pond, but to his shock, he saw that somehar
else was already diving after Lunar. “Tarot, no!” He
had no idea if Tarot could swim! In the worst case, he had to rescue two
harlings instead of just one!
Tarot didn’t
think his actions over and just acted. He jumped into the water after Lunar and
took a deep breath before disappearing beneath the surface. He was lucky as a
strand of his hair managed to grab hold of Lunar’s wrist. Doing his utmost
best, he managed to drag Lunar back to the surface
with him.
Lunar panted
and his big eyes rolled about in panic. He wanted out of the water!
“Don’t fight
me!” Tarot tried to pull Lunar with him as he swam toward the edge of the pond.
But Lunar’s panic kept him from obeying Tarot’s instructions and he struggled
in an attempt to get to the side quicker. He started to drag them under again,
but fortunately Pansea reached them at that moment and took over.
Pansea managed
to get both Tarot and Lunar onto the grass and then climbed from the water
himself. He first checked on Lunar, who had been under water the longest, and
was relieved to find the harling alert, although coughing up water. Then he
checked on Tarot, who looked shocked. “That was a quick reaction,” he complimented
Tarot.
“I saw him fall
over, but I couldn’t stop him.” Tarot flashed back to seeing Ponclast hurt
Aleeme. Back then, he had been unable to stop Ponclast as well.
“You saved him,
Tarot. You did well.” Pansea pulled both harlings into his arms. A crowd was
gathering around them and in the distance he heard Lisia call out Tarot’s name.
“You saved Lunar.”
Tarot’s eyes
filled with tears. He had failed to protect Aleeme, but he *had* managed to
save Lunar.
~~~
Skye, Lunar’s
hostling, hurried over to the garden after having heard that his harling had
almost drowned. The blond har headed for his son and felt relieved when he saw
the harling clinging to Tarot, the harling Lisia had adopted. “Lunar! Oh, what
happened?” He dropped to his knees next to his son and pulled both harlings
against him. His gray eyes met Pansea’s and begged the younger har to explain
this to him.
Lisia stood
behind Pansea and nudged the young har’s shoulder, indicating Pansea should
inform Skye. Pansea drew in a deep breath and hoped his voice sounded steady
enough to calm Skye down further. Skye was only one year older than him and
they had been friends for a while, but then Skye had chosen to host and had
dedicated himself to his son. Skye’s story was a sad one. Lunar’s father had
left after Skye had told him that he was with pearl and, disillusioned, Skye
had stayed at Harling Gardens to raise his son on his own. “Lunar fell into the
water. Tarot went after him and brought him back to the surface.”
Skye crushed
both harlings to his chest. The thought of losing Lunar was too much for him.
After Rain, Lunar’s father, had left, the harling was his only reason to
continue living. “Thank you, Tarot. You have no idea how much Lunar means to me.”
Tarot managed
to lift his head in Skye’s restraining hold and smiled reassuringly at the
hostling. “He means a lot to me too.”
Skye smiled
warmly at hearing that. “We will always be in your debt, Tarot. You saved his
life.” And the harling had saved Skye’s as well. The hostling would have given
up on himself had Lunar drowned.
“We should get
them indoors,” Lisia suggested, taking charge of the situation. “They need to
get dry.”
Pansea picked
up Tarot and carried him while Skye settled Lunar upon his hip. The harlings
tried to maintain contact by holding hands, but had to let go eventually. “I
want Tarot to stay,” Lunar whispered and his pale blue eyes looked at Skye pleadingly.
“Please, just a little longer.”
Skye looked at
Tarot and the other harling nodded, indicating he wanted Lunar to stay close
too.
“We will go to
my rooms,” Lisia stated. His rooms were big and once they were there, they
could look after the wet chilled harlings.
~~~
It took time
and cajoling on the hara’s part to get the harlings
dried up and into clean clothes. The moment they had finished cleaning the two
up, Tarot had walked over to Lunar and took his hand, squeezing it gently.
Since Lunar was resting on the bed, Tarot lay out beside him and the harlings
fell asleep holding each other close.
Pansea, Lisia,
and Skye stood at the foot end of the bed and watched them with puzzlement. “I
knew they were friends, but their closeness amazes me,” Skye said eventually.
“They have only known each other for two months!”
“Sometimes
friendships form quickly,” Lisia commented and shrugged. His instincts told him
that it was a good thing that Tarot and Lunar were so close, but that did leave
Skye on his own. Lisia took Skye’s hand and guided the har to a couch in the
corner of the room. Seated, they could still keep an eye on the sleeping
harlings. Pansea joined them and they nursed the tea which Lisia had poured.
Pansea stole
glances at Skye. Skye was a beauty and Pansea had cursed the day Rain had made
his appearance in Skye’s life. If it hadn’t been for Rain, Pansea might have
tried to court Skye.
Skye blushed
under the stare Pansea was giving him. He hadn’t realized Pansea had been
attracted to him until recently. One of the other hara had mentioned it by mistake
and Skye had felt guilty after hearing that. He had always thought of Pansea as
a good friend and had never suspected deeper feelings could be involved. He
forced himself to stop thinking about the past. After Rain had entered his life
and had left him after making him with pearl, he felt he no longer deserved a
second chance with any har. He had been so stupid. He had believed Rain, who
had been one of the exchange teachers that had come to the
He loved Lunar.
The harling wasn’t to blame for his hostling’s mistakes, but Skye might
throttle Rain if he ever met the other har again.
Lisia, as alert
as always, easily picked up on the tension between Pansea and Skye. It didn’t
take him long to figure out what was happening between the two young hara. He
had seen it happen before. They were attracted to each other and that pleased
him. For some time he had been keeping an eye out for a suitable partner for
Pansea, who had passed feybraiha two years ago.
Skye looked in
the direction of the bed and smiled at the sight of the two harlings holding
each other tight. “If it hadn’t been for Tarot, Lunar would be dead now.”
Sorrow swept over him. “I should have taught him how to swim.”
Pansea drew in
a deep breath. “I am amazed that Tarot can swim. I didn’t think he could.”
Nohar had taught the harling.
Skye swallowed
hard. “Lunar isn’t like Tarot. Tarot is strong and independent. Lunar is…”
Lisia moved
closer to Skye and rested a hand on the other hostling’s arm. “It’s Rain’s
fault that you birthed the pearl prematurely. It is not yours.” Rain had left
two weeks before Skye should have dropped the pearl. As a result, stress had made
Skye deliver early.
“I don’t want
to talk about him.” Skye pulled away, forcing Lisia to remove his hand from
Skye’s arm. “I don’t want to talk about him ever again.” As far as he was
concerned, Rain was dead.
“You are doing
a great job raising Lunar,” Lisia said, realizing his chance. “But wouldn’t it
be better if Lunar had a father figure as well?” He heard Pansea draw in his
breath sharply and Lisia grinned. A plan was taking shape in his mind.
“I will raise
Lunar alone!” Skye had had enough of this conversation and rose from the couch.
He made his way over to the bed, intending to take Lunar and go home. But when
he tried to pry Tarot away from Lunar, the harling protested in his sleep. “I
want to go home,” he mumbled, hoping his words would register with the sleeping
Lunar.
“Pansea, help
him.” Lisia stayed where he was and leaving it to Pansea to come to Skye’s aid.
Pansea rose at once and joined Skye at the bed. That gave Lisia a chance to
study the two of them. They were of the same height, but that was where all
comparison ended. Where Pansea was red-haired, Skye was as fair as the sun.
Pansea’s skin had attained a bronze tint from spending time outdoors while Skye
remained pale because he preferred to lock himself up indoors. Skye was also
much too skinny and Pansea had gained weight and muscle tone because he was
playing with harlings the entire time. Having Pansea around would be good for
Skye.
Pansea knelt
near the bed and untangled the two harlings. Tarot woke up however and glared
angrily at him. “I know you want Lunar to stay close, but his hostling has to
take him home. You can see Lunar again tomorrow.”
Tarot however
shook his head. “I want Lunar to stay!”
Skye sat down
on the bed and met Tarot’s gaze. He dealt with harlings on a daily basis, but
he had never seen such intelligence and determination in the eyes of a harling
as young as Tarot. “Lunar is my son, Tarot. I need to take him home, but you
can play with him tomorrow.”
Tarot
considered this and then reluctantly released Lunar. The other harling moved
about, but didn’t wake up. “Do you promise I can play with him tomorrow?”
“I promise,”
Skye agreed and gathered Lunar in his arms. “Thank you for rescuing my harling,
Tarot.” His fingers gently brushed Tarot’s brow before he made his way over to
the doorway.
Smiling back at
Skye, Tarot rolled toward Pansea so the har could hold him close. The door
closed behind Skye and Tarot gave Pansea a sad smile. “I like Lunar and I like
his hostling.”
Pansea smiled.
“I like them too.” He would rekindle his former friendship with Skye. One never
knew what would happen in the future and he hoped that Skye would warm up to
him too.
~~~
“Where do you
think you are going?” Pansea opened one eye and shot Tarot a look.
“I want to
check on Lunar.” Tarot had managed to lower himself onto the floor and had been
about to sneak over to the doorway. Unfortunately for him, Pansea had woken up.
Lisia however was snoring softly. “Please?”
Pansea left the
bed and put on a morning robe. Squatting down in front of the harling, he said,
“Lunar is safe with Skye. You don’t need to worry about him.” He picked up the
throw from the couch and wrapped Tarot up in it. Tarot had a look that made him
go soft on the inside however.
“I was dreaming
again,” Tarot whispered since he didn’t want to wake Lisia up too. “And in my
dream, I didn’t find Lunar in the water. In my dream, Lunar drowned. Please, I
need to see him.”
Pansea sighed.
He shouldn’t give in to Tarot, he really shouldn’t, but he couldn’t bear seeing
the sad frightened look in the green eyes. “But only for a moment and then we
will return to Lis.” He walked over to Lisia’s desk, wrote a note, and placed
it on the bed next to the hostling. Next, he picked up Tarot and carried him
out of the room. He hoped Skye hadn’t changed rooms or else he might end up
searching for Lunar the entire night.
~~~
Skye’s eyes
opened at once when he heard footfalls in the corridor. They were approaching
his room and he instantly became alert. Although he didn’t really expect Rain
to ever return to him, he *did* worry that the other har would one day try to
take Lunar away from him. He turned a sleeping Lunar onto his side and then
left the bed. Involuntarily, he searched for something that he could use as a
weapon should it be Rain on the other side of the door.
“Skye? It’s me, Pansea…” Pansea had come to a
stop in front of Skye’s door and had a hard time keeping Tarot from kicking at
the door to open it. Until that moment, he hadn’t realized how stubborn Tarot
could be. “Don’t do that.” He restrained Tarot’s legs and knocked softly on the
door instead. “You don’t want to startle Lunar, do you?”
That question
got Tarot’s attention and he looked at Pansea guiltily. “Of
course not!” Glaring at the door, he tried to ‘wish’ it open and his
heart missed a beat when the door handle moved. Skye appeared in the doorway
looking stressed and still disheveled from sleep.
Skye stared at
Pansea and Tarot in wonder. “What are you doing here?” It was the dead of
night! He was relieved though that it wasn’t Rain standing there.
“Tarot wants to
see Lunar. I have the feeling it might be hard to separate them after what
happened at the pond today...at least for a while.” Pansea put Tarot on his
feet and the harling hurried over to the bed. After climbing onto the side,
Tarot lay down and curled himself around a still sleeping Lunar. Even the dark
hair seemed to pull Lunar closer and wrap itself around the other harling.
Skye didn’t
know what to think of his development, but in the end he said, “I don’t mind if
Tarot sleeps here tonight.”
“I don’t think
this problem will limit itself to just tonight. I have the feeling Tarot will
want to sleep close to Lunar for the next few weeks. He thought Lunar was about
to die, Skye.” Pansea shuffled his feet, unwilling to enter before Skye had
asked him in. “Do you want me to leave Tarot with you? Or…
Or do you want me to stay too?” He was too much of a coward to look Skye in the
eye when asking. If he *had* looked at Skye, he would have noticed the blush
that was spreading over the blond har’s face.
“Do you want to
stay, Pansea?” Skye felt nervous. He hadn’t felt like that since he had taken
aruna with Rain that first time. Pansea raised his gaze and Skye swallowed
nervously. The expression in Pansea’s eyes told him how much the other har
wanted to stay. “Come inside then.”
Pansea finally
entered Skye’s room and walked toward the bed. The first thing he noticed was
that, although the room was sparsely furnished, Skye had done his best to give
it a homely feel. Skye had put flowers in a vase, plants on the window sill,
and had even created a mural depicting a garden on one wall. “I like your
room.”
“Thank you.”
Skye quickly bowed his head so Pansea couldn’t see his blush intensify. A yawn
overwhelmed him. He had been sound asleep when Pansea’s approach had woken him.
Catching the
yawn, Pansea pointed at the bed. “We should get some sleep.” Skye’s heart
started to beat faster. Was Pansea planning on sleeping in his bed? “That is,
if I may,” amended Pansea, who didn’t know what to make of Skye’s shy reaction
so far.
“But of
course.” Skye gestured for Pansea to stretch out on the bed.
Pansea sat down
and smiled at the two harlings before stretching out onto his side. Tarot
rested in front of him and the harling was still curled protectively around
Lunar. "Aren’t you tired?” he asked, hoping Skye would join them too.
Skye felt
nervous when he lay down and moved closer to his son. Lunar happily wriggled
into place between Tarot and his hostling before sighing blissfully. Looking at
Pansea, Skye wondered what to think of the situation they were in. The two
harlings were sound asleep, but Skye didn’t think he would go to sleep that
easily...not with Pansea so close. “I owe you an apology,” Skye whispered
eventually.
Pansea frowned.
“I wouldn’t know what for.”
“For the way I
ignored you once Rain entered my life. I stopped talking to you. I am sorry
about that.”
“You were in
love,” Pansea replied, disliking the guilt in Skye’s eyes. Skye had suffered
enough. There was no reason for the har to apologize to him. “I just wish
things had worked out between the two of you. Lis is right...a harling needs
his hostling and his father.”
“I asked Rain
to stay… I almost begged him,” Skye whispered and shivered. “But Rain didn’t
want to be a father. He was angry with me for creating a pearl.” He had loved
Rain so much and had thought that a pearl would increase their happiness.
“Then he is a
fool,” Pansea stated and his fingers laced with Skye’s. “A harling is the most
precious gift a har can get.”
Skye managed a
smile and voiced his innermost thoughts before he knew it. “You should have
been Lunar’s father.”
The admission
made Pansea blink in surprise. “Skye, I didn’t think you were interested in me like
that!”
“I wasn’t… Not
until recently.” Skye closed his eyes. “Somehar told me you cared about me
deeply. I didn’t know that.”
Pansea shifted
uncomfortably. Maybe coming there had been a mistake. “I had always hoped you
would give me a chance.”
“But I only had
eyes for Rain. I am such an idiot.” Self-reproach colored Skye’s voice.
“No, don’t say
that.” Pansea reached for Skye and brushed some fair hair away from the other
har’s face. “You were in love with him.”
“I was a fool.
I still am.” Skye laughed bitterly but kept the sound down since he didn’t want
to wake the harlings. Averting his gaze, he moved his head away from Pansea’s
fingers.
Pansea’s breath
caught. Had he understood that hint correctly or was he reading things into
Skye’s behavior? He had no choice but to take a risk. “I like you still, Skye.
Nothing has changed on my part.” The astonishment in Skye’s eyes showed that he
had been right. Skye returned his feelings. /Oh, you must have been lonely this
last half year, raising Lunar on your own./ But Pansea
didn’t share his thoughts with Skye yet. It was too early to instigate
something as personal as mind touch.
“You shouldn’t.
Not after the mistakes I made.” Skye wished Pansea would stop stroking his
hair. Although he craved the contact, he felt he didn’t deserve it. “Some of
our friends had warned me. Opal had said Rain wasn’t the right har for me, but
I didn’t listen.”
“You were in
love and sometimes when you are head over heels about some har you don’t listen
to your friends' advice. I don’t blame you, Skye. I am just angry with Rain for
abandoning you.” He moved his hand until he was stroking Lunar’s hair instead
of Skye's. “Lunar is adorable. How can a har not want to have him for a son? I
don’t understand that.”
“Rain wanted
his freedom and he felt I was trying to tie him down.” Skye smiled shyly at
Pansea. “How about you, Pansea? You were raised to
host pearls just like me.”
“Lisia stopped
me from creating pearls with the wrong hara. Once I'd entered feybraiha, making
pearls was all I could think of, but Lisia talked some sense into me. It has
only been since I started taking care of Tarot that I realized what a
responsibility having a harling is.” At the mention of Lisia’s name, Skye’s
expression darkened.
“Ah yes. You
have Lis now.” Pansea had moved into the hostling’s rooms and Skye cursed
himself for being such a fool in the past.
Pansea blinked.
“Don’t tell me you think that… Oh Skye! Lis and I aren’t taking aruna! I only
moved into his rooms so we could take care of Tarot! Don’t tell me you think I
have feelings for Lis! He is our hostling, Skye! Just thinking about taking
aruna with Lis makes me…” The thought alone killed any arousal on his part.
A hopeful light
appeared in Skye’s eyes. “Do you mean that? Lis and you aren’t chesna?”
“Of
course not!” Pansea
laughed too loudly and the harlings started to wake up. Tarot opened his eyes
first and looked questioningly at Pansea. “Go back to sleep, Tarot,” Pansea urged
quietly. “All is well.”
Lunar stretched
in his hostling’s arms and released a joyous cry when he found Tarot close
again. “What are you doing here? I thought you were staying with Lis!”
“I wanted to
see you and Pansea took me to your hostling’s rooms.” Tarot rested his brow
against Lunar’s and gazed into the pale blue eyes affectionately. “You scared
me when you went under water.”
“I didn’t want
to do that.” Lunar’s hands patted Tarot’s back. “I lost my balance.” Yawning,
his eyes started to close again. “Am tired,” he whispered and then drifted off
into sleep again. A moment later, Tarot followed and the two harlings were
sound asleep.
“I think I have
been replaced,” Skye murmured and smiled warmly at Tarot. Lunar didn’t have
that many friends. Only Mist and Onyx liked the younger harling and he was
thrilled that Tarot had accepted Lunar. Lunar was a bit of an outcast because
his father had run out on them. Harlings could be cruel at that age and most of
them refused to become friends with his son.
Pansea extended
his arm and rested his hand on Skye’s hip. Gray eyes sought out
his own and held a mixture of hope and fear. /I won’t leave you like
Rain did,/ Pansea thought, but knew it was too early
to say that aloud. They had to build a foundation for their love first and at
its center had to be their two little harlings: Tarot and Lunar.
~~~
Lisia looked up
from the letter he was reading when Pansea slouched into his office. The young
har was dragging his feet and Lisia thought he knew why. “You and Tarot didn’t
return to bed last night.”
“Did you find
my note?” Nervously, Pansea shuffled his feet.
“I did. You
stayed at Skye’s room then?” Lisia couldn’t stop himself from grinning.
“Tarot didn’t
want to leave and Lunar wanted him to stay too. We have a problem, Lis.” Pansea
had found a solution to their problem, but he wasn’t sure Lisia would consent
to it.
“Sit down,
Pansea. You look tired.” The young har had probably spent the day wracking his brain
on how to tell Lisia about his infatuation with Skye. Lisia picked up two cups
of tea and then sat down opposite Pansea on the comfortable couch near the
window. “It is very unusual for two harlings that young to grow so attached to
each other.”
Pansea didn’t
make eye contact and blew onto the surface of his tea. His long, red hair
covered part of his face and he was well aware that he was hiding behind it. He
felt like he had betrayed Lisia. When the hostling had asked him to become
Tarot’s father, Pansea had accepted. He still loved the harling, but things had
changed. “He doesn’t want to leave Lunar’s side.”
“He is with
Skye and Lunar now?” Lisia felt it was time to steer Pansea in the direction he
wanted the younger har to go.
“Yes.” Pansea
nodded and sipped tea. “Lis, Tarot has taken a liking to both Lunar and Skye
and wants to be with them.” He swallowed hard. He didn’t want to hurt the
hostling’s feelings!
Lisia decided
to make things easier on Pansea. “Maybe you should move in with Skye instead
and take Tarot with you?” Pansea’s head whipped back and his aide’s large eyes
fastened on his. Lisia laughed. “Pansea, I am not *that* blind. Everyhar would
have noticed the tension between you and Skye the other day.” Pansea grew
flustered and Lisia chuckled. “I am happy for you! I was keeping an eye out for
a har that would be suited to you and Skye is an excellent choice. It also
helps that Tarot and Lunar are smitten with each other.” He grinned slyly. “You
always wanted your little family and now you are getting your chance.”
Pansea released
the breath he had been holding. It came as a relief that Lisia had realized the
attraction between Skye and him. “You are not angry with me then?”
“Why should I
be? I want what is best for all my harlings and Pansea,
you are one of my children too. I know that children eventually grow up and I
believe that Skye and you are good for each other, but take it slowly. He was
hurt when Rain left.”
Pansea nodded. “And what about Tarot? I know you love him and I don’t want
to take him away from you.”
“You are not
taking him away from me. I can still see him whenever I want and having a
loving family is the best thing that can happen to Tarot. Skye will love him,
Lunar already worships the ground Tarot walks on, and you will be glue that
keeps it all together. Oh, Pansea, Cobweb was so wrong about the harling!” It
still vexed him that Cobweb had shoved Tarot aside so easily. His eyes narrowed
and he nodded. “Yes, I will do that.”
Pansea felt
puzzled as he wondered what Lisia was referring to. “Do what, Lis?”
“I am going to
pay Forever a visit. I promised Tarot to find out more
about Azriel and Aleeme and I really want to talk to Cobweb about Tarot.” Lisia
wanted to confront Cobweb regarding his decision in sending Tarot to the
Pansea wasn’t
convinced Lisia’s decision to confront Cobweb was the right one. “Should you do
that, Lis?”
“Tarot has been
with us for eight months. He is a year old now and during all that time neither
Cobweb nor Swift inquired about his well-being.” Lisia nodded again. “Yes, I
believe it is time to confront them and find out where they stand.”
Pansea knew
Lisia well enough to know that he couldn’t change the hostling’s mind. “Skye
and I will take care of Tarot,” he promised.
“Of course you
will,” Lisia said and smiled. “And maybe Skye and you can work on deepening
your relationship.” He gave Pansea a wink which made the young har grow
flustered once more. Lisia was determined to do this. He *had* to do this for
Tarot’s sake. The harling deserved to know if he would be an outcast for the
rest of his life or if he still had a chance to be accepted into Cobweb’s
family at one point.
TBC
Part
3
Lisia
recognized Cobweb at once even though the har had changed over the years. When
they had first met at the breeding facility, Cobweb had still been very much
Terzian’s former consort in favoring his soume aspect and letting Swift take
charge. That had changed once Cobweb had been forced to protect his people and
take the lead some time back. Lisia hadn’t even recognized Cobweb at first when
the har had arrived at the
Cobweb, while
surprised that Lisia had left his precious harlings to visit with him, also
rejoiced at seeing his old friend again. Snake stood behind him and removed his
hands from Cobweb's shoulders, allowing him to advance on Lisia, who was in the
process of dismounting his sedu. “Lis, I am surprised to see you! I thought you
would never be able to pry yourself away from your harlings!” Cobweb embraced
Lisia and smiled into the caramel-colored hair. Although Lisia and he had
drifted apart recently he still considered Lisia a very good friend. They
shared a very special connection since Cobweb had been the first har with whom
Lisia had been ouana with. At that time, it had been a huge step for the
hostling, who had been raised to be soume only.
Lisia smiled a
smile that was partly genuine and partly fake. He was happy to see Cobweb
again, but he was also cross with him for abandoning Tarot. “Swift once invited
me to visit and I felt the time was right. The
“We are honored
to have you.” Cobweb guided Lisia over to the porch. “You remember Snake, don’t
you?”
Nodding, Lisia
smiled at Snake. “I remember you.” He was happy that Cobweb had found a new
chesnari. Terzian had never been any good for Cobweb. Terzian had even fathered
four pearls at the breeding facility without Cobweb knowing about it.
“I remember you
too, Lisia.” Snake smiled at the hostling. Lisia had impressed him with being
in charge of
Looking about,
Lisia saw Swift approach. A har dressed in elegantly draped clothes followed
him. That had to be Seel, his consort and Azriel’s hostling. Seeing them
reminded him why he was there in the first place, which was to gather
information about Azriel and Aleeme.
“Lis! I didn’t believe it when Cobweb told me
that you were visiting!” Swift embraced Lisia and then studied the hostling.
“My, you look well!” Not only the harlings were thriving at
Lisia smiled.
“I don’t have one. I dedicate myself to my harlings, you know that.”
“It is a shame
that you have no chesnari! You deserve one!” Swift took a step aside. “This is
Seel, the love of my life.”
The hostling
inclined his head in greeting. “I remember Swift talking about you whenever he
visited me. He loves you very much.”
Seel actually
blushed lightly. “I love him too.” He sought out Swift’s hand and squeezed it.
They were extremely close these days. They had to be with Azriel and Aleeme to
help them work through their past and supported each other so that they could be
there for their son and his chesnari.
“I will show
you to your room!” Cobweb claimed Lisia’s right hand and guided him into the
house.
“So this is Forever. I always wondered what it looked like.” Lisia liked
the old house and smiled when Cobweb gave him an adoring look. “You made me
curious talking about it the way you did.”
Cobweb opened
the door to Lisia’s temporary room and placed the other har’s luggage on the
bed. “I am glad you are here. I had always hoped you would visit one day!”
Lisia wanted
nothing more than to ask Cobweb about Azriel and Aleeme, but realized he had to
take this slow. He didn’t want Cobweb to realize yet why he had come to visit
the other har. He would only bring Tarot up once he had deemed the time right.
~~~
Skye watched
Lunar and Tarot play with their stuffed animals and smiled. Pansea had been
right: the two harlings were practically inseparable. One could even say they
were joined at the hip. Skye blushed as he realized that Pansea and he had
become closer as well. He had been stunned to hear that Lisia had wanted Pansea
to move in with him. As a result, they had gotten an offer to move into an
apartment, normally reserved for staff members, but since their family
consisted of four now, they had priority and so the patch work family had moved
in.
“Hello there.”
Pansea snuck up on Skye and wrapped his arms around the other har. Resting his
chin on Skye’s shoulder, he inhaled the sweet scent that perfumed the blond
hair deeply. “I smell lilies of the valley.”
“It’s my favorite.”
Skye trembled in Pansea’s embrace. He still hadn’t gotten used to the fact that
Pansea was living with them and that the other har desired him. They had shared
breath, but hadn’t taken aruna yet. They were waiting for something, but they
didn’t know yet what that was. Maybe they were waiting for the right moment.
Skye wanted to feel more secure about himself and
their relationship before taking aruna with Pansea. “They have been playing all
afternoon.”
Pansea smiled
into the fair hair and squeezed Skye tighter. “Hopefully they will tire in an
hour or so. Then I can have you to myself and won’t have to share you.”
Skye’s blush
deepened. He turned in the embrace and studied Pansea’s brown eyes. “Thank you
for taking this slow.”
“I need to go
slow too, Skye. I need to get to know you all over again and I enjoy having
dinner with you, watching you comb your hair, or rocking Tarot and Lunar. We
don’t need to hurry.”
Skye sighed
deeply and pressed closer. “Share breath with
me...please.” Even though he wanted to take it slow too, the need to share
breath and take aruna was strong.
Pansea glanced
at the two harlings, whose stuffed animals were wrestling each other, and
judged it safe to press his lips against Skye’s. It was the second time that he
tasted the blond har’s essence and he felt drunk on its exotic taste. Sliding
his hand into Skye’s fair hair, he massaged Skye’s neck and then cocked his
head to deepen the kiss and share breath. The world around them faded and they
didn’t notice that Lunar was giggling and Tarot staring at them in surprise.
“I told you
they liked each other!” Lunar elbowed Tarot gently in his side. “They are
sharing breath!”
Tarot continued
to stare at Pansea and Skye. He sensed the affection coursing between them and
experiencing it made him feel warm and tingly all over. It was the first time
ever that he had sensed such warm and deep feelings and he liked it. “I hope
they will continue to share breath.” Then the warm feelings might continue.
“They have to
stop eventually,” Lunar said wisely. “They need to breathe!” He was thrilled
that his hostling was in love, especially since he liked Pansea a lot. The fact
that the four of them lived together currently pleased him. “See?”
Tarot felt
disappointed when Pansea released Skye’s lips, but to his surprise, the warm
sensation stayed and soothed the restless fringes of his mind. Smiling at
Lunar, he let the other harling win their stuffed animals’ mock fight.
~~~
Staying at Forever differed greatly from his routine at the
Cobweb’s
expression was dark when he turned around, but the moment he saw Lisia, a
forced smile appeared on the har’s face. Lisia wondered why Cobweb found it
necessary to pretend in his presence, but received his answer a moment later.
“Lis, I want to
introduce you to some very dear friends.” Cobweb took Lisia’s arm and guided
him over to a dark-haired har with bewitching eyes. “This is Ulaume.”
Lisia’s breath
almost caught, but he managed to control his surprise. So this was Ulaume,
Aleeme’s father. One look at the long hair showed where Tarot had inherited his
animated mane. Ulaume’s hair possessed a life of its own as well. “I am Lisia,”
he greeted the other har and kept tight control over his thoughts, knowing that
all of the hara in the room could read his mind if they desired to do so.
Ulaume smiled,
but Lisia could tell that the har’s mind wasn’t focused on greeting him. Ulaume
was distracted and Lisia wondered why.
“And this is
Flick, Ulaume’s chesnari. You probably already know their names,” Cobweb added
as he introduced Flick to Lisia.
“I know your
reputations. Your names are always spoken with the greatest of respect,” Lisia
replied and smiled at Flick. The first thing he noticed about Flick was the
kind eyes. He almost asked them if Aleeme was accompanying them, but held his
tongue just in time.
“Cobweb also
told us about you and the way you run the
“It is hardly a
burden,” Lisia answered. “The harlings give me strength and love.” Lisia’s gaze
shifted to Cobweb and he wondered if the other har even remembered sending
Tarot to the
“Dinner is
being served,” Swift stated and gestured for them to take their seats. Lisia
ended up seated in-between Cobweb and Ulaume. He found it hard to take his eyes
off of Ulaume’s lively hair and the other har noticed it. “I am sorry,” Lisia
said, trying to gather his first bit of information. ”But I find your hair
fascinating. It seems to possess a life of its own.”
“It is a legacy
from the tribe who incepted me. They are called the Snake People.”
Lisia
considered his options and decided against mentioning knowing a harling whose
hair had a life of its own, but since he wanted to make some progress he asked,
“Do you have any harlings, Ulaume?” The sad shadow that darkened Ulaume’s eyes
informed Lisia to tread carefully.
“Yes, two
actually, but…” Ulaume swallowed hard and looked at Flick for help.
“Our firstborn,
Aleeme, Azriel’s consort is in Immanion, recovering from…from a traumatic
experience.” Flick twined his fingers with Ulaume’s and squeezed them to show
his support. “He has made some progress, but is still far from healed.”
Ulaume quickly
added, “Our second son’s name is Orien. He didn’t accompany us this time. He
stayed at home.” He desperately wanted to change the subject. Lisia probably
didn’t know how much pain the question caused them.
Lisia frowned
and pretended to think deeply. “Azriel… Swift, isn’t that the name of your harling?”
Swift grew
uncomfortable and Seel placed a hand on his knee beneath the table. “Yes, it
is.”
“Is he here? I
would love to meet him.” Lisia hated playing games, but Cobweb had started this
when he had sent Tarot to him.
It was Snake
who answered Lisia when he realized that the question had upset Swift and Seel.
And Cobweb was too taken aback to answer either. “Azriel is in Immanion too.
They were both injured during the war in Fulminir. Ponclast…hurt them.” He
hoped saying that would suffice.
“I am sorry I
brought it up.” Lisia offered Swift and Seel an
apologetic look. “I heard rumors, but wasn’t sure these things had really
happened. I feel for all of you. I know what it is like to lose a harling, be
it in mind or in body.”
Knowing Lisia’s
apology was sincere, Swift accept it. “We don’t like discussing them. The pain
is still very close and as long as they require healing we…”
Swift paused and swallowed hard before continuing. “We want them to recover,
but the steps they are taking are small and take lots of time. Azriel is making
the best progress, but it will be a long time before they can return to
Forever.”
Snake, also
eager to change their subject, asked Lisia, “You visited Immanion once, didn’t
you?”
“I did. I
pleaded my case before the Hegemony and Swift was a great support. I couldn’t
have done it without him.” Lisia also realized he had to step away from
discussing Azriel and Aleeme, but at least he had succeeded in making them talk
about the two hara.
~~~
Lisia returned
to his room earlier than he normally would have since he wanted time to think
everything over. All four hara, Swift, Seel, Ulaume, and Flick, were still
greatly affected by what had happened to Azriel and Aleeme and he wasn’t sure
if addressing the matter was the right thing to do. He should probably focus on
talking to Cobweb and maybe Snake since the two of them seemed inseparable.
~~~
Tarot liked
being squeezed in the middle and pulled Lunar close. It had become their habit
to sleep with Pansea and Skye on either side of them while Tarot curled around
Lunar. Tarot liked it that way. It made him feel safe, cherished, and warm.
Pansea and Skye had shared breath again when they had already been in bed and
Tarot and Lunar had giggled like mad. Both harlings were happy that the adults
liked each other so much.
Tarot looked at
Skye and saw warmth gazing back at him. Skye was happy and Tarot felt Pansea’s
warm feelings brush against his mind as well. It wouldn’t be long before those
two took the next step with aruna. That thought worried Tarot since the only
‘aruna’ he had ever witnessed had been Ponclast forcing himself on Aleeme.
“It won’t be
like that,” Pansea murmured and patted Tarot’s hair. The strands reacted by
curling themselves around his fingers. “Aruna is different from the travesty
you witnessed. We take aruna because we desire and love each other. It is not
meant to hurt a har.”
Skye nodded.
“Pansea is right.” Pansea had told him the truth about Tarot and Skye had been
shocked to learn that the harling had been forced to watch a har perform pelki on his hostling. He didn’t know that Ponclast had
been that har or Aleeme was the victim. The names meant nothing to him.
“I believe
you,” Tarot whispered and his hair let go of Pansea’s wrist “I always knew that
what he did to my hostling wasn’t right.”
Pansea pressed
closer to Tarot and held him tight. He hoped that once it was time for Tarot to
go through feybraiha that he could leave those horrid memories behind him.
~~~
Lisia went for
a stroll the next evening in the hope that he would run into Cobweb. He had
spent most of the day exploring the old mansion since Swift, Seel, Ulaume, and
Flick had retired into Terzian’s old study. Lisia had a good idea of what they
had discussed that afternoon. Azriel and Aleeme were still in Immanion in the
care of healers. Lisia was dying to find out the condition the two hara were
in.
He was lucky
when he found Cobweb meditating in the back of the garden. He was sitting
cross-legged on the grass as the breeze played with his long, raven hair. The
eyes were closed, but opened the moment Lisia came to a halt in front of him.
“My good friend,” Lisia said and seated himself on the grass, mirroring
Cobweb’s position. He placed his hands palms up on his knees and studied Cobweb’s
mysterious eyes.
Cobweb drew in
a deep breath as his gaze become more focused and alert. “Why are you here,
Lis?”
Lisia nodded.
He had hoped that Cobweb would find the courage to confront him directly. “Why
do you think I am here?”
Cobweb’s eyes
flashed angrily. “I am not in the mood to play games.”
“Fine
then.” Lisia stared
deeply into Cobweb’s eyes and explained, “Almost a year ago you had Paran
deliver a harling to the
The older har
flinched. He had been afraid that the harling was the reason why Lisia was
visiting Forever. “As if I could
ever forget him! I curse his existence every day of my life!”
Lisia drew in
his breath sharply. “You have no right to say that. You don’t even know Tarot.”
“Ah, you gave
the little monster a name then? Does he even understand what you try to tell
him?” Cobweb glared at Lisia. “Why bring him up now? Has he become a burden?”
The hostling of
“I saw the
expression in his eyes, Lis. I know what he is. He is an abomination.”
“I can’t
believe you said that!” Lisia jumped to his feet and paced restlessly. “He is a
harling, Cobweb! An innocent harling! It wasn’t his fault that Ponclast raped
Aleeme!”
Cobweb jumped
to his feet as well and his long fingers dug into the fabric of Lisia’s robes
and grabbed hold of him. “You have no idea what you are talking about! You
weren’t there! You didn’t see Aleeme… Azriel… You didn’t…” Cobweb released
Lisia and turned away, trying to compose himself. He couldn’t let his emotions
get the better of him. “You don’t know the extent of the damage which Ponclast
did to them.”
“You are wrong.
I do know. I lived it in Tarot’s memories. I saw it all.”
Cobweb spun
around and glared at Lisia.
“That harling
tried to defend his hostling whenever Ponclast appeared to torment Azriel and
Aleeme. That harling was beaten and kicked by Ponclast and ignored by his
hostling. That harling tried to distract Ponclast whenever he focused on
Azriel. That harling cried night after night because of what he witnessed and
the pain it caused him!”
“You are wrong!
I saw the harling! He is unnatural!” Cobweb’s hands became fists and he swung
them at Lisia threateningly. “Aleeme was practically dead when
“But Tarot
isn’t to blame for that. Cobweb, he is just another victim!”
“I don’t want
you to ever bring him up again, do you hear me?”
Cobweb was
practically screaming and Lisia took a step back, stunned by the venom that
echoed in Cobweb’s voice. “How can you hate so easily, Cobweb? You didn’t even
try to get to know the child.” His eyes narrowed. “Tarot is Ulaume’s high har.
Do Ulaume and Flick know he exists? Did you ever tell him?”
“They know he
exists,” Cobweb snapped. “But they have no desire to meet him either.”
“And
what about Aleeme?
Did he ever inquire after his son?”
Cobweb’s anger
seemed to vaporize. “Aleeme is… He is not well.” Defeated, he wrapped his arms
around his waist and hugged himself. “Aleeme barely responds to anyhar. Not
even the healers.”
“And
Azriel?”
“Azriel is
responding, but… He is traumatized. The healers believe it will take at least
another year for Azriel to function normally again.”
“And
Aleeme?”
“They can’t
tell. As long as he remains unresponsive they can’t heal his wounded psyche.”
Cobweb radiated
defeat and Lisia felt a great sympathy for the other har. He carefully wrapped
an arm around Cobweb’s shoulder and drew him close. “I understand it hurts. I
saw through Tarot’s eyes and I know what Ponclast did to them, but you can’t
give up hope, Cobweb. And you can’t blame the harling for Ponclast’s actions.”
Lisia’s heart missed a beat when Cobweb’s swimming eyes met his. The other har
was doing his best not to burst into tears.
“Lis, I can’t
care about this harling, don’t you understand? Ponclast raped Aleeme and forced
him to birth his pearl. This harling…”
“This harling
loves his hostling and let Ponclast kick and beat him in order to draw him away
from Aleeme. Tarot isn’t a monster, Cobweb. I am not asking you to welcome him
into your family – not yet – but please reconsider your ideas about him. Tarot
is a lovely harling. At first, he had some problems adjusting, but all he
needed was some tender loving care. Do you think life was easy on him being
Ponclast’s prisoner?” A tear escaped Cobweb’s eyes and Lisia wiped it away. “Tarot
isn’t a monster.”
Cobweb drew in
a few deep breaths as he tried to regain control over his raging emotions. “Why
did you name him that?”
“I didn’t. He
told me his name was Tarot.” Lisia frowned. “Maybe I should have asked him if
he had named himself or if Aleeme had.”
“I can’t
imagine Aleeme caring enough about that harling to name him.”
“You don’t know
that. I will ask Tarot when I get back.” Lisia guided Cobweb toward the pond
where the distressed har could wash his face if he desired so.
Cobweb knelt,
splashed some water onto his face, and managed to get a grip on his emotions.
When he rose again, he felt a lot calmer. “What is the harling like?”
“He is bright
and lovable. You might not believe it, but he is well-liked. He even saved
another harling from drowning.” Lisia folded an arm around Cobweb’s waist and
started to walk him back to the mansion. “Pansea and I took care of him at
first, but then Tarot struck up a friendship with the harling he rescued. His
name is Lunar. And now Pansea and Tarot are living with Lunar and his hostling,
Skye.”
Cobweb had to
admit that it didn’t sound like a monster was living in the
“Aleeme? He talks about his hostling a lot. And Azriel too. He hates Ponclast. I believe that Tarot sees
Aleeme and Azriel as his hostling and father. Ponclast is just the har who hurt
them.” They slowed down when the mansion came into sight since they weren’t
done talking yet. “He loves Aleeme very much, Cobweb. Maybe you should consider
telling Ulaume and Flick about their high har.”
“Ulaume
inquired about him,” Cobweb admitted. “But I told him that I didn’t know what
had happened to him.”
“They have a
right to know, my friend.” Lisia came to a standstill and so did Cobweb. He
lifted the handsome face with a gentle finger. “Tarot has found a family in the
Cobweb shook
his head. “That can never happen. Aleeme lost his mind. The healers aren’t sure
they can reclaim him.”
“I am sorry to
hear that.” Lisia sent Cobweb a wave of sympathy and understanding, but then
added, “Did you ever consider the possibility of Tarot having a healing
influence on Aleeme?”
Cobweb shook
his head. “Aleeme is too far gone to notice Tarot. Aleeme has locked himself up
in his head.”
Lisia nodded
once. “It might be too early to consider putting Aleeme and Tarot together. Aleeme
needs more time and Tarot has all the time in the world. He can wait.”
“What do you
want from me, Lis?” Cobweb searched Lisia’s gaze.
“I want you to
give Tarot a chance to meet his hostling when the time comes. Not now, but when Aleeme feels stronger.”
“And should
that time never come?”
“Then I hope
Azriel will have recovered enough to talk to Tarot. Whether you want to accept
it or not, the three of them are connected. Azriel, Aleeme, and Tarot share a
history together and Aleeme and Tarot are blood. You don’t have to answer me
now. Talk it over with Snake, if you want. And certainly discuss the matter
with Swift, Seel, Ulaume, and Flick. You don’t have to do so now, but don’t put
it off forever. You *will* have to discuss this among yourselves eventually.”
Cobweb sighed
deeply. He had always known that.
TBC
Part
4
Skye sighed and
leaned against Pansea. “Aren’t they cute like that?” Tarot and Lunar had
cuddled up to each other on the couch and were holding each other in their
sleep.
“Tarot is very
protective of Lunar. One of the older harlings was teasing Lunar during play
time and Tarot came to his defense.” Pansea remembered the frightened look on
the older harling’s face when Tarot had confronted him with his behavior. The
teasing had stopped at once. “Tarot looks upon Lunar as his brother.”
Skye frowned.
“I am not so sure about that. Yes, Tarot loves Lunar, but not as a sibling.”
Skye looked at Pansea from over his shoulder. “I can see them becoming chesna
in time.”
“And
what about us? Do
you see us becoming chesna in time too?” Pansea turned Skye in their embrace
and smiled sweetly at him. “I would like that.” His feelings for Skye had
deepened since he had moved in with the blond har. “And Tarot would like that
too.”
Skye blushed.
“Before we can discuss becoming chesna, we should take aruna, Pansea.”
Pansea enfolded
Skye in a tight hug and smiled. “I would love to take aruna with you.” He
rested his brow against Skye’s and his lips sought out their counterpart. “If
you want me, that is.”
Skye’s blushed
deepened. “But the harlings…”
“I can ask one
of the other hostlings to watch them, if you would like to take aruna with me.
I am sure they wouldn’t mind. Tarot and Lunar are easy to watch over.”
“When would you
like to… What day…? When…?” Skye hated the fact that he was stuttering.
“How
about tomorrow evening?”
Pansea should be able to find a harling sitter during the day.
Skye swallowed
nervously. “That sounds perfect.” It would give him the time he needed to
mentally prepare himself for the intimacy. It had been a while since he had
last taken aruna.
“Agreed. Tomorrow evening it is.”
~~~
Cobweb couldn’t
sleep. He hadn’t been able to sleep since he had talked with Lisia. He hadn’t
told Snake about the conversation yet nor had he approached Ulaume and Flick.
He was still trying to accept that Ponclast’s harling wasn’t the monster he had
thought him to be.
“What’s wrong?”
Snake curled protectively around Cobweb and rubbed his chesnari’s shoulder. He
loved holding Cobweb while sleeping, but for some reason, sleep continued to
elude the other har. “I can tell that something is on your mind, but you shield
your thoughts. Why would you do that? I thought you trusted me.” The fact that Cobweb wasn’t confiding in him hurt. After all
they had been through Snake had thought they trusted each other
unconditionally.
Cobweb raised
his gaze and sighed. “Do you remember Paran telling us about Aleeme and Azriel?
And that they had found a harling in the room with Aleeme? Aleeme’s
harling?”
Snake was
surprised that Cobweb was bringing the matter up. For the last year, the
subject had been off-limits. “I remember.”
“I sent him to
Lisia at the
Certain things
suddenly made sense. Snake had always wondered what had happened to the child.
“Is that the reason why Lisia is here?”
“He wanted to
talk to me about the harling, yes.” Cobweb shifted in the embrace until he had
attained a more comfortable position. “The harling even has a name these days.”
Snake remained quiet and gave Cobweb the time he needed to sort out his
thoughts. “Snake, I…” Cobweb averted his gaze. “I always thought the harling
was a travesty. Even Paran assured me that he wasn’t normal.”
“Did you see
the harling in question?”
Cobweb shook
his head. “Only in Paran’s mind. I didn’t want to meet
him in person. When Paran’s message reached me I told him not to take the
harling to Forever. I didn’t want to raise that child under my roof. Ponclast
raped Aleeme, Snake. Aleeme never wanted to host that pearl.”
Snake stroked
Cobweb’s dark hair soothingly. “So why is Lisia here?”
“He wants to
know where I stand. He wants me to give the harling a chance, but I am not sure
I can. I don’t want to confront Azriel and Aleeme with that harling...ever.
Tarot should never have come into existence.”
“But he lives.”
Snake moistened his lips and tried to think of a way to advise Cobweb in the
matter. “What does Lisia want from you?”
“At
the moment – nothing.
But he wants me to see the harling when I feel ready to do so. According to him,
Tarot is an adorable harling.” Cobweb’s face contorted. “I can’t believe that.
I know what monster fathered him.”
Snake continued
to caress Cobweb’s hair calmly. “But you also know Aleeme. And no matter what
you say, Aleeme is that harling’s hostling. Maybe Tarot inherited more
characteristics from Aleeme than he did from Ponclast? Did you ever consider
that possibility?”
Cobweb
shrugged. “I am afraid to discuss this matter with Ulaume and Flick.”
“I assume they
know about the harling’s existence?” Since Cobweb was opening up to him, Snake
wanted to find out as much as he could.
“Yes, but they
never inquired more about him. I never told them what happened to the harling
and they never asked.” Cobweb sighed again and closed his eyes. “What do I do,
Snake?”
“You can’t
forget about Swift and Seel either. They deserve to
know what happened to the harling.” Cobweb nodded and Snake added, “But not
yet. You should talk to Ulaume and Flick first. After all, this is about *their*
high har.”
“I am not sure
I can handle that.” Cobweb tucked his head beneath Snake’s chin and rubbed his
cheek against his chesnari’s chest. “I should have talked to them right after I
had found out about the harling, but back then I wasn’t up for that. And now it
has been too long to bring it up again.”
“Why don’t you
ask Lisia to help you? Maybe he knows of a way to start off that conversation?
After all, isn’t that why he is here?” Snake had quickly caught on to the
reason for Lisia's presence. “I don’t blame Lisia. He probably feels the
harling belongs at Forever or with Ulaume and Flick. But I also understand why
you sent the harling away. It is a complicated matter and therefore, you need
to discuss it in depth.”
Cobweb wasn’t
looking forward to that conversation, but he also knew it had to be done. This
was one matter he couldn’t ignore.
~~~
The next day,
Lisia found Ulaume in the library. Flick was nowhere in sight and Lisia
realized that this was his chance to talk to the other har in private. “I hope
I am not disturbing you,” he said as he entered the room and pretended to be
interested in some of the books.
Ulaume was
pulled away from his musings as he forced himself to smile at Lisia. “The books
are available to all hara.” He didn’t know what to make of the hostling. At his
request, Cobweb had told him Lisia’s history and he felt sorry for the other
har who had birthed and lost so many pearls. The mere thought of having been
forced to abandon Aleeme or Orien’s pearl hurt. “Do you like to read?”
“I seldom have
the time to do so. My harlings keep me busy.” Lisia selected a temporary book
and took it with him when he seated himself on the couch opposite Ulaume.
“Though the place isn’t that crowded anymore. We only have ten young harlings
living with us at the present. Hostlings are no longer encouraged to create
pearls.”
Ulaume studied
the other har and smiled at sight of the fair strand of hair that framed
Lisia’s face. His own hair reacted and danced against his shoulders. “It has
been a while since I raised a harling. My sons are…” Ulaume’s voice died as his
thoughts turned to Aleeme unexpectedly.
“I am sure your
son will recover. All he needs is time.” Lisia wanted to comfort Ulaume.
“I hope you are
right.” Ulaume’s eyes took on a distant expression. “The last time I saw
Aleeme, he didn’t recognize me. I am not even sure he knew someone was there
with him.”
Lisia recalled
the things Tarot had told him, like how he had sensed emotions in Azriel and
Aleeme, even toward the end. “Did you sense anything from him?”
Ulaume blinked
in surprise at that. “I didn’t reach out to him. I was afraid of what I would
feel.”
“But I did.”
Flick stood in the doorway before making his way over to Ulaume and sitting
down beside his chesnari. “I sensed something.”
Ulaume’s eyes
widened. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Because
you were too distressed.” Flick folded an arm around Ulaume’s shoulder and pulled him close. “I
sensed recognition in him. Aleeme knew we were there.”
Tears streamed
from Ulaume’s eyes. “Then why didn’t I sense it? You aren’t being cruel to me
in feeding me false hope, are you?”
“I am being
honest with you. I would never lie to you.” Flick kissed the palm of Ulaume’s
hand and then rested it against his chest close to his heart. “Aleeme knew we
were there. He is getting better. It's just taking a long time.”
“Our little
harling…” Ulaume sobbed unashamedly and clung to Flick. “I want to kill
Ponclast over and over again for what he did to our son!”
Lisia bit the
tip of his tongue. He wanted to bring up Tarot, but didn’t know how to do that.
In the end, Flick helped him unintentionally.
“We must be
strong for our son’s sake. Aleeme will need us once he returns to us and
remembers…remembers what happened in that room.” Flick wiped away Ulaume’s
tears with the sleeve of his tunic.
Lisia took a
chance and said, “I heard Aleeme conceived a pearl and birthed it.”
Ulaume winced
and Flick briefly closed his eyes. “Yes,” Flick replied. “And he almost died
delivering a second pearl.”
“I don’t want
to hurt your feelings, but can you tell me what happened to those pearls?”
Lisia hated pushing them, but felt he had to if he wanted to make any progress.
“Lisia, I don’t
think this is the time or place…” Flick started, but then Cobweb appeared in
the doorway and he stopped talking.
Having sensed
Ulaume’s emotional uproar, Cobweb had sought them out and wasn't surprised to
find Lisia with them. “Lis is right. We need to discuss the harling.”
“Cobweb, not
now,” Flick stated. “Don’t you see the state Lor is in?”
Cobweb made his
way over to the couch Lisia was sitting on and seated himself
next to the hostling. “I am sorry, but this needs to be done.” He felt deeply
for Ulaume and sent him comforting thoughts. “I should have prepared you for
this, but… I wasn’t sure I could discuss the matter until now.”
“You're not
making any sense.” Ulaume forced himself to get a grip. Cobweb wanted to talk
to him and he couldn’t cave in now. “Prepared us for what? Discuss what
matter?”
Cobweb looked
over at Lisia and, after the hostling had nodded, he answered, “We need to
discuss Aleeme’s harling.”
Ulaume’s breath
caught and he felt Flick tense up. “Why?” Ulaume asked. He had managed to block
out the harling’s existence until now.
“Because
Lisia reminded me of my duties.” Cobweb shifted on the couch until he could take
Ulaume’s hand in his.
Flick felt more
balanced than Ulaume, so he responded, “You never told us what happened to the
child.”
Cobweb sighed
deeply and bowed his head. “I sent the harling to the
Ulaume’s
wondering gaze settled on Lisia’s face. “Is that the reason for your visit?”
Lisia nodded.
“I need to know where you stand for Tarot’s sake. He needs to know if he has a
family here or not.”
“Tarot? The harling’s name is…Tarot?” Ulaume’s
large eyes were filled with surprise.
“That’s what he
told me, yes. You seem surprised, but at the same time, you appear to recognize
the name.” Lisia wondered about Ulaume’s reaction.
Ulaume’s voice
had taken on a distant tone when he spoke again. “We had found tarot cards,
Aleeme and I…and I had been teaching him how to read them. That had happened
only a few weeks before Azriel and Aleeme had been abducted.” Ulaume looked at
Flick and freed his hand from Cobweb’s hold. He placed them on either side of
Flick’s face. “Can it be that Aleeme named the harling?”
“I had always
wondered where that name had come from. I doubt Tarot gave himself that name.
It would make sense if Aleeme had named him,” Lisia remarked.
Flick grabbed
hold of Ulaume’s hands and guided them onto his lap where he rubbed the
trembling fingers. “Everything is possible, Lor.” Turning his head, his gaze
fastened on Lisia. “Tarot is living with you?”
“He was until
recently. He was adopted into a family.” Lisia saw no reason to lie. “Tarot is
relatively happy. He has healed this last year. He had been damaged when he'd
arrived. Ponclast had made him watch the things he had done to Azriel and
Aleeme.” Ulaume cringed and Flick pulled his chesnari close again. “Tarot’s
mind was wide open and I witnessed Ponclast’s actions as well. I don’t know if
you will believe me when I say that Tarot tried to turn Ponclast’s wrath onto
himself and away from Aleeme. I have felt Tarot’s love for his hostling.” He
turned his head and fixed a firm stare at Cobweb while addressing him.
“Although we gave Tarot a substitute hostling, he still longs for Aleeme.”
Ulaume rested
his head against Flick’s shoulder. “I never considered the fact that the
harling might long for Aleeme.” He had suppressed the fact that Aleeme was a
hostling and had birthed a pearl. He had tried to forget that the harling even
existed.
“Aleeme is in
no condition to face the harling,” Flick said firmly.
“He doesn’t
have to, at least not yet. It was never my intention to force a meeting on him
while he is still healing,” Lisia explained.
Tipping his
head, Ulaume looked at Lisia. “What *was* your intention then?”
“I am merely
here to remind you that Tarot is still out there and that he shouldn’t be
forgotten. I understand that his existence pains you because it reminds you of
what Ponclast had done, but I ask you not to take this out on the harling.
Tarot is just another victim of this madness.” Lisia gazed at Ulaume
beseechingly.
However, it was
Flick who answered him. “I understand what you are trying to say, but… This has
come as a bit of a shock. Give us some time to deal with this.”
Lisia nodded.
“I understand. Take all the time you need.” He could wait since he had achieved
his goal. He had reminded them that Tarot still existed and shouldn’t be
ignored.
~~~
Tarot didn’t
like the fact that Sand, Mist’s hostling, was going to take care of them that
night, but then Lunar explained to him why Pansea and Skye wanted to be alone.
He felt stupid for not realizing the truth earlier. Accepting his lot that
evening, he let Sand entertain them and hoped that Pansea and Skye enjoyed
aruna. He would check on them later to see that neither of them was injured.
Memories of Ponclast forcing himself on Aleeme flashed in his mind, but then
Lunar wrapped his arms around him and the images faded.
~~~
Pansea shared
breath with Skye and let his fingers glide through the blond hair. It had taken
them a while to figure out their roles during aruna, but once they had started
touching each other their bodies had made the decision for them. Pansea had
turned ouana and Skye soume. They had taken aruna slowly, enjoying feeling the
other har’s body. It had been perfect and afterwards they had lain in each
other’s arms, feeling tired, but sated.
Skye rested his
head against Pansea’s shoulder and sighed contentedly. He lay facing Pansea and
cuddled closer, draping a leg possessively over Pansea’s thigh. “I had
forgotten what taking aruna could be like,” Skye whispered against Pansea’s
chest and his breath caressed Pansea’s skin. The other har trembled against
him.
Pansea kissed
the crown of Skye’s hair. “Next time I want you to be ouana.” Skye tensed
against him and Pansea knew why.
“I have never
been ouana before,” Skye admitted. His long fingers moved down Pansea’s chest
and came to rest on the flat abdomen. “I am not sure I will be able to perform
satisfactorily.” He had gone through feybraiha one year before the Gelaming
army had arrived at the breeding facility and had only been soume so far. Eager
to change the subject because he felt embarrassed, he added, “I gained a
harling, you know. I didn’t even have to host and birth his pearl. I love Tarot
though. And I love you.” He raised his head and pressed an old-fashioned kiss onto
Pansea’s lips. “I am glad we talked about our feelings that day.” If it hadn’t
been for Tarot, they might never have opened up to each other.
~~~
Tarot and Lunar
tiptoed into their new apartment and headed for the bed. Sand had escorted them
back in the morning and the rising sun bathed the bed in a golden glow. Pansea
and Skye seemed to possess a glow of their own though and the harlings giggled.
“They took
aruna,” Lunar murmured, careful not to wake the sleeping hara. “They look
happy.”
Tarot was
relieved to see them smiling in their sleep. He sensed their happiness and
pulled Lunar along with him. “Let’s climb onto the bed.” He wanted to be close
to them and soak up their warmth. Together, the harlings managed to push,
shove, and lift each other up the side of the bed. Crawling over to the two
hara, they let themselves fall onto the mattress. Tarot pulled Pansea’s arms
around him and Lunar did the same with Skye’s. The two harlings lay facing each
other and couldn’t stop giggling.
Skye opened an
eye and looked at them. He couldn’t grow mad with them though. Rooning Pansea had left him feeling sated and happy. “What
are the two of you doing here? Weren’t you staying with Sand?” He tickled
Lunar, lightly running his fingertips down his harling’s side.
“Stop it!”
Lunar tried to brush his hostling’s hand away and eventually succeeded.
Lunar’s cry
woke Pansea from his sleep and a smile formed on the young har’s face as he
watched Lunar kicking and Tarot chuckling. He joined Skye in tickling them and
in no time, Tarot was trying to crawl away from his tormenting hands. “Oh no,
you are staying.”
In the end,
Tarot tried to tickle Pansea back and got help from an unexpected source named
Skye. They ended up tickling and laughing at each other.
~~~
“Lisia? Can I talk to you?” Flick
had thought everything over and needed to talk some more with the hostling.
He had encountered Lisia by chance in the corridor and decided to use the
opportunity to talk to him.
“Of
course.” Lisia
gestured for Flick to follow him into one of the rooms. He walked over to the
window and looked out over the woods that surrounded Forever
before turning around and smiled encouragingly at Flick. “What do you want to
know?”
“I want to talk
to you about the harling.” Flick walked over to a chair and rested his hand on
the back. “About Tarot. I want to know what he is
like.”
Lisia’s smile
turned warmer. “I can tell you one thing: he inherited one characteristic from
Ulaume. Tarot’s hair is alive as well.”
Flick swallowed
hard. The harling had gotten a face all of a sudden. “He has Lor’s hair?” That was one thing he hadn’t counted on. “What
does he look like?” He wanted to see the harling for himself, but that was
impossible. He didn’t think Lisia would agree to sharing breath with him so he
could see for himself.
Lisia cocked
his head and wondered on what he would gain if he allowed Flick into his mind.
Tarot might find a friend in Flick if Lisia allowed the mind touch. “Would you
like to share breath and see?”
“I was about to
suggest that.” Sharing breath was a practical way of sharing information. “Can
you show me what happened after he arrived at the
Lisia
understood and nodded. “I will share breath with you. Come over here.”
Flick covered
the distance between them and touched his lips to Lisia's. While sharing
breath, Flick witnessed everything that had happened in the
“Tarot needed
time to adjust, but once he did, he became popular. At the moment, living with
Pansea, Skye, and Lunar is the best thing that could happen to him. He has a
family now.”
Flick nodded
once. “I agree.” Tarot needed that family and removing him from that situation
would only hurt the harling. “What do you suggest we do?”
Lisia had been
expecting that question. “I would suggest not approaching Tarot for another
year. From what Ulaume has told me, Azriel and Aleeme need
another year at the very least to recover. Then, in a year, come to the
Nodding, Flick
agreed with Lisia. “That way Ulaume and I have a year to make up our mind.” He
had a year to talk everything over with his chesnari. What he had seen in Lisia’s
mind had helped and he realized that the hostling was right: they couldn’t
ignore the fact that Ulaume and he had a high har.
~~~
Ulaume turned
around when he sensed Flick’s return. “Did you talk to Lisia?” He hadn’t known
a peaceful moment since Lisia had reminded him of the harling’s existence.
“I did and we
get a reprieve. We have a year to decide what to do regarding Tarot.” Flick
pulled Ulaume into his arms and shared breath with his love, showing the things
he had seen in Lisia’s mind. “That’s Tarot,” he whispered into Ulaume’s mouth.
Eyes filling
with tears, Ulaume relived the traumatic events that had shaped Tarot. “Lisia
spoke the truth. The harling tried to defend Aleeme. Oh, Flick, Tarot is very
clearly Aleeme’s harling…and my high har.” He had seen Tarot’s hair move in
Flick’s mind. “I need that year to accept this.”
“You have time.
We have time.” Flick hugged Ulaume tight and comforted his chesnari.
~~~
Cobweb had
mixed feelings when he said his temporary goodbyes to Lisia along with Flick
and Ulaume, who were also present. The hostling was ready to return to the
One look at
Ulaume showed Lisia that Flick had told his chesnari about Tarot and he sensed
acceptance in Ulaume’s mind. He had a feeling that Flick and Ulaume would
accept Tarot more readily than Cobweb. Lisia still hoped that Cobweb would tell
Swift and Seel about Tarot. They also deserved to know the harling needed his
family. “Hopefully we will meet again in a year,” he said in farewell to
Ulaume, Flick, and Cobweb. “Please consider telling Swift and Seel about Tarot
too.”
Cobweb nodded
his head. “I need time.”
“I understand
that, my dear friend, and you have a year.” Lisia raised his hand in goodbye
and turned his horse around. “The next time we will meet I will hopefully
welcome you to the
“Lor and I will
be there,” Flick stated. He couldn’t speak for Cobweb, but Ulaume and he had
talked and had made the decision to visit with Tarot in a year.
Lisia smiled at
hearing Flick’s resolution. His visit to Forever hadn’t been in vain then. He
had accomplished some of his goals.
TBC
Part
5
Ulaume entered
Aleeme’s room in the healing wing of the palace in Immanion and sat down on the
edge of the bed. The har in it stared blankly at the wall, having been propped
up against a pile of pillows and covered in a warm blanket. “Hello, my son.”
Ulaume leaned in closer and pressed a parental kiss onto Aleeme’s brow. “I have
missed you.”
Flick would
visit with Aleeme later since Ulaume had asked his chesnari to give him a few
hours alone with their son. For the moment, Flick was visiting with Pell and
Cal.
“We visited Forever and talked to Cobweb and Snake.” Ulaume continued in
an effort to attract Aleeme’s attention, but the emerald eyes remained dead.
“We also met a har called Lisia. He is in charge of the
Although Aleeme
had somewhat healed in body, his mind was still extremely fragile. The healing
which
“Forever is
such a lovely place, Aleeme. Maybe we could visit Cobweb in a short while.
Would you like that? Leave this place and go to Forever?” Ulaume didn’t really
expect a reply and as expected didn’t get one. Aleeme remained quiet. Ulaume
twined his hands with his son's and rubbed the skin. “Aleeme, can you hear me?”
He looked his son in the eye in the hope that Aleeme would blink. “You can
squeeze my hand if you want to.”
But Aleeme
showed no reaction and tears built in Ulaume’s eyes. “I want you back,” he
murmured and pulled Aleeme into an embrace. Rocking his son, he cried bitter
tears. Aleeme had been in this state for more than a year now and he was losing
hope that his son would ever regain his wits. “Please, I love you.” But Aleeme
was a dead weight against him, unresponsive and heavy.
In his despair,
Ulaume resorted to doing the one thing he really didn’t want to do: he brought
up Tarot. “Lisia mentioned that he is caring for a harling. The harling is a
little over a year old and Lisia said that his hair has a will of its own. It
curls itself around his wrist.” Aleeme shivered against him and Ulaume surmised
that his son was cold, so he hugged him tighter. “His name is Tarot…” Ulaume
sucked in his breath when Aleeme suddenly whimpered. “Aleeme?”
Ulaume quickly searched his son’s eyes and then reached out mentally. Stunned,
he found that Aleeme was aware of what was happening. “Aleeme?”
The green eyes
filled with an emotion which Ulaume couldn’t label. His own tears continued to
flow, relieved and happy as he was that his son had reacted to hearing Tarot’s
name. “Aleeme, do you know that name?”
Aleeme trembled
against him and Ulaume rubbed his son’s back soothingly. “Aleeme, you *know*
that name, don’t you?” Focusing his thoughts, he probed the tendrils of
Aleeme’s mind. For the first time in over a year, Aleeme responded to him and
Ulaume found new hope in that fact. “Aleeme? Can you
look at me?” He was afraid to hope that Aleeme would focus his gaze upon him,
but then the miracle happened and the eyes fixed on him. “Aleeme!”
Aleeme
whimpered pitifully and pressed himself against Ulaume. He hadn’t wanted to
leave his secret place where he had been safe, but the name his father had
mentioned had made him remember that he wasn’t alone. There was a harling too.
“Don’t tire
yourself out.” Ulaume continued to rock Aleeme slowly. He guided his son’s head
to his shoulder and whispered soothingly.
Ulaume’s calm
presence helped Aleeme fight his dreadful memories and he managed to calm down.
Ulaume had pulled him from his trance and now the memories came crashing in on
him. He saw Ponclast’s ugly visage in his mind, Azriel being restrained and
left to rot in his own waste, and at his side near the bed was the harling who
had tried to draw Ponclast’s attention away from him. Tarot…
Ulaume, who had
joined Aleeme’s mind, cried out softly when he sensed the recognition in
Aleeme’s thoughts. “You remember Tarot!”
Aleeme started
to pant as more horrid memories invaded his mind. He had managed to lock them
out for so long, but since his barriers were down, they swamped him.
“I am there for
you. I am holding you and I won’t let go. You are not alone.” Ulaume
concentrated on sending Aleeme calm encouraging thoughts. “I had almost given
up on the fact that you would ever react to me! Azriel will be relieved to hear
that you have woken from the stupor you were in as well.” Azriel was staying in
the same healing wing, but in a room down the corridor. Ulaume knew that Azriel
visited with Aleeme at least once a day and would sit beside the bed for an
hour until one of the healers came and shooed the recovering har back to his
bed.
Aleeme let
Ulaume rock him. It was good to have his father close. Although he wasn’t in
any physical pain, his mind screamed with anguish.
“Hush now,”
Ulaume whispered and soothed the ripples in Aleeme’s mind. “Don’t worry about
anything at the moment. Just try to calm down.”
Aleeme focused
on Ulaume’s voice and presence and managed to regain his calm. He had been in a
daze for over a year and his body ached because he hadn’t moved his limbs for a
long time. He wasn’t sure he wanted to be ‘awake’. He would have preferred to
stay in his catatonic state.
Ulaume’s eyes
widened when he felt Aleeme reach out to touch his mind. He opened his mind and
lured Aleeme deeper inside until he could curl his thoughts around his son’s
frightened presence. He desperately wanted to reach out to Flick and let his
chesnari know that Aleeme was reacting, but he was scared that he would upset
the precious balance in his son’s mind which was still linked to his. “Did you
give him that name?”
Aleeme nodded,
weakly rubbing his face against his father’s shoulder. “I did.”
Ulaume’s heart
missed a beat at hearing Aleeme’s voice. “Oh, I am so glad you returned to us!
I was afraid that I had lost you forever!”
Aleeme didn’t
know how to react like that. Had it been up to him, he would have never
returned to the living.
~~~
Flick almost
doubled over when Ulaume’s thoughts slammed into his mind with a force that he
had never experienced before. Cal, who was standing next to him, reached out
and steadied his swaying friend. Flick groaned and tried to make sense out of
the cobweb of thoughts and emotions that invaded his mind. /Please, Lor, calm
down!/
/How can I
possibly calm down when Aleeme woke up! Flick, he was aware of my presence! He
talked to me! You have to come at once!/
/Flick, you
have to come to Aleeme’s room right now!/ Ulaume
guided the sleeping Aleeme back onto the mattress and tucked the blanket in
around his frame. /Our son has returned to us! You should let Swift and Seel
know too!/ Somehar had to visit with Azriel later and
carefully prepare the har for the news that his chesnari had regained his
awareness.
Flick looked at
“I will come with
you,”
~~~
Flick forced
himself to calmly enter Aleeme’s sick room. Ulaume had stretched out next to
their son and was holding him. Ulaume’s eyes however were open and were already
seeking him out. “Lor, is it true? Did he react?” Flick made his way over to
the bed and sat down on the other side. He rested his hand on his son’s dark
hair and tried to read Aleeme’s mental state. To his surprise Aleeme’s mind was
open.
“He talked to
me. He confirmed that he had named the harling Tarot. It was that name that had
brought him out of his state.” Ulaume held his son close and reached out with
his right hand so he could twine his fingers with Flick’s. “He is merely
asleep. Can you feel the difference?”
Flick nodded.
He had already sensed that something had changed within his son’s mind.
~~~
A few minutes later,
“Hello,”
Azriel’s brown
eyes filled with emotions when he raised them to look at
Azriel’s hand
inside
“He did. He
talked to Ulaume.”
Azriel
continued to tremble and tried to speak again, but his vocal cords refused to
cooperate and no sound left his lips. He tried again and managed to ask, “What
did he say?”
Hearing
that name set off a chain of reactions in Azriel. At first, he stared at
Azriel raised
his head. His face was wet with tears and his big, brown eyes stared into
Azriel shook
his head. “I don’t care. If the situation has changed, I will sense it.”
Flick vacated
his place on the bed and helped Azriel sit down. He arranged the thick material
of the morning robe around Azriel’s body and then went to stand next to
“Aleeme?” Azriel placed his hand on Aleeme’s
chest and held his breath. “Are you here with me?” He was afraid to get his
hopes up, but would
Aleeme stirred
in his sleep as he sensed Azriel’s presence and opened his eyes. His green eyes
had regained their expressiveness and Azriel flung himself at his chesnari,
hugging him loosely. Aleeme managed to raise a shaky arm and draped it across
Azriel’s shoulder. “I am here with you,” he whispered and savored having Azriel
close. “I am sorry I scared you, but I couldn’t return to you.”
Azriel cried
against Aleeme’s chest and tried to find the right words. Lifting his gaze, he
managed in-between sobs, “I love you so much.”
“I love you
too,
Ulaume nodded.
“Mentioning Tarot did the trick.” Surprise colored his eyes. “I never thought
that they might have accepted that harling. I had always assumed they would
hate him.”
“Because that’s
what Cobweb wanted us to believe,” Flick remarked. “Cobweb can’t accept the
harling, but we never took into account that Aleeme might accept being Tarot’s
hostling. We have been so stupid.” He was angry with himself for not realizing
this sooner. “Tarot is the key to their recovery.”
Ulaume nodded
thoughtfully. “We will work toward a family reunion eventually. I am sure
that’s what Aleeme wants.”
“But for now
you should concentrate on helping them heal,”
Ulaume nodded,
knowing
~~~
Cobweb shuffled
into the old study which had been Terzian’s once. Now it was Swift who sat
behind it reading reports and writing replies. At times like these Cobweb found
it hard to see a Parsic ruler when he looked at Swift. He only saw his son –
his former harling – whom he had tried to protect. He had paid a high price for
Swift’s protection though. For years, Terzian had kept him prisoner and Cobweb
had been forced to convince himself that Terzian loved him because it had been
the only way for him to cope with the situation. Only when Snake had entered
his life had he experienced love for the very first time.
Swift looked up
from his reading and smiled at his hostling. He was always happy to see Cobweb
and this time was no exception. “What brings you here?” A closer look at Cobweb
revealed that his hostling was nervous. Had something happened?
“I received a
message from Immanion.” Cobweb saw the way Swift’s shoulders slumped forward
and a tired shadow appeared in Swift’s eyes. “Yes, it is about Azriel and
Aleeme.”
Swift steeled
his heart for the bad news he was about to receive. For the last year, he had
had nothing but bad news. “What happened? Did their condition deteriorate?”
During the first six months, Seel and he hadn’t left Azriel’s side, but then
the healers had convinced them that there was little they could do to help
their son. So in the end, they had returned to Forever, but still visited their
son at least two times a month.
Cobweb shook
his head. “They are improving.” Swift’s reaction was instant. His son jumped to
his feet and marched over to him, wrapping his arms around his hostling, who
held his son in turn. “It happened during one of Ulaume’s visits. He mentioned
Tarot and Aleeme stirred.” Cobweb had been stunned to hear that Aleeme had
reacted in a positive way to hearing about the harling. He had been convinced
that Aleeme hated the child because that’s what he would have done. “It appears
Aleeme reacted to the name and confirmed he had given it to the harling.”
Swift held
tightly to Cobweb. “And what about Azriel? How did he
react to hearing that Aleeme was aware of his surroundings again?”
“They
reconciled. Pellaz sent me a message saying that Azriel and Aleeme fell asleep
in each other’s arms.” That news had warmed Cobweb’s heart.
Wiping away his
tears, Swift raised his gaze to look at his hostling. “I had given up hope.”
Seeing only the
hurting harling whom he had consoled when Swift had been little, Cobweb tried
to soothe him. “You should go to Immanion. Tell Seel what happened. You should
go together.”
“Aren’t you
coming too?” Swift would feel better if his hostling remained at his side.
“I am not sure
I should. I was the one who had tried to hide Tarot from everyone and now it
seems that the harling is the key to Aleeme and Azriel’s recovery. I made a
mistake.”
“Azriel would
love to see you. I am sure of that.”
Cobweb kissed
Swift’s hair. “We shouldn’t swamp him. Seel and you should go. I can visit at a
later time.”
Swift realized
that his hostling’s advice was wise, but he still wished Cobweb would come with
them.
~~~
Azriel couldn’t
stop staring into Aleeme’s eyes since the expression in them had been vacant
for so long, but now Aleeme was looking back at him. They were alone at the
moment. Cal and Pellaz had visited while Flick and Ulaume had rested and after
the two Tigrons had gone, Azriel and Aleeme had curled up together. He knew he
had to say something, but nothing seemed right. “Thank you for coming back to
life.”
Aleeme
moistened his lips. He still felt weak and it cost him much energy to say, “I
didn’t want to leave my secret place,
“What changed
your mind?” Azriel couldn’t be angry with his chesnari for wanting to stay
catatonic. Aleeme had suffered the most at Ponclast’s hands.
“Lor mentioned
Tarot. Do you remember him?” His green eyes searched Azriel curiously. He
wasn’t sure how coherent Azriel had been at the time.
“Of course I
remember him.” Azriel's heart stung painfully. Ponclast had forced him to watch
Aleeme birth that pearl, grabbing his hair and pulling at it, raising his head.
“Aleeme, what about the harling? Can we blame him
for…for ‘his’ actions?” He for one couldn’t.
Aleeme shook
his head lightly and his brow rubbed against Azriel’s. “I don’t blame the
harling. I never did.” He hated Ponclast for raping him, but he couldn’t blame
the harling. He had hated the pearl when he had hosted it, had cursed it when
he had birthed it, but once the harling had hatched from the pearl, he had
realized that he was dealing with an innocent. “I didn’t think he would
remember that I had named him. He was only a day old when I did.” After that,
Aleeme’s condition had quickly deteriorated. “I wish we had been able to
protect him from…”
“We couldn’t do
a thing,” Azriel remarked softly. “But we can make a change now. But you have
to grow strong again first.”
“So do you.”
Aleeme pressed the palm of his hand against Azriel’s cheek and lovingly stared
into his eyes. “We will heal together.” Tipping his head sideways, his lips
sought out Azriel’s. It was a first, tentative sharing of breath, but the
intimacy of it deepened the connection between them.
TBC
Part
6
Ulaume and
Flick sat with Aleeme. Azriel had ventured into the bathroom after announcing
he was going to take a bath. They welcomed Azriel’s initiative for it was the
first time in over a year that he wanted to clean himself up. Ulaume still
couldn’t believe that the mere mention of Tarot’s name had helped improve
Aleeme so much. Aleeme was actually sitting upright in bed and with Flick’s
help, was eating some vegetable soup. Aleeme still was too weak to leave the
bed, but Sheeva was hopeful that Aleeme’s condition would continue to improve.
“I am full,”
Aleeme announced and pushed the spoon away when Flick placed it at his lips.
“Stop now.”
Flick placed
the bowl onto the nightstand and smiled at his son. Aleeme *was* getting
better, there was no doubt about it. One thing Ulaume and he stayed clear of
was discussing Ponclast and what had happened at Fulminir. Sheeva had told them
not to pressure Aleeme into telling them. Maybe Aleeme would choose to confide
in Azriel solely and, if that was the case, hostling and father had to accept
that. However, they were determined to support their son any way they could.
“Do you want to rest now?”
Aleeme shook
his head. “I am not tired at the moment.” He turned his head so he could watch
Azriel soaking in the bath tub. The fact that his chesnari was close soothed
him. “What happened to Tarot?” He had to know, even if he dreaded hearing the
answer.
“A har called
Lisia took him in and found him a family.” Ulaume offered Aleeme his hand and
was touched when his son accepted the gesture and wrapped his fingers around
the hand.
“Lisia shared
breath with me and showed me what a bright and handsome harling Tarot is.”
Flick was still somewhat surprised that Aleeme cared so much about the harling.
He knew his son was a compassionate soul who wouldn’t have blamed the harling
for its existence, but he was still stunned to find out just how much Aleeme
cared about Tarot. “We agreed to visit with him in ten months. If you have
recovered enough by then you can join us.”
Aleeme’s expression
darkened. “I have to wait ten months to see my harling?”
Flick caressed
his son’s brow. “I love you. You are my son and I am your hostling. I loved you
when you were little and I love you now, but it escapes me how you can care so
deeply about Tarot.”
Aleeme
flinched. “Don’t blame the harling for what another har did.”
Flick brushed
his son’s hair away from his face. “I saw some of the things that happened in
that room. Tarot tried to keep Ponclast away from you.” Aleeme nodded as the
green eyes filled with tears. “Maybe we misjudged the situation.” Maybe Aleeme
would have come around sooner if they had taken Tarot to his hostling. “But you
need to concentrate on healing for now.”
Azriel entered
the room again wrapped up in warm morning robes. His hair was still damp and
smelled of lavender, which was Aleeme’s favorite scent. He sat down on the bed
with his back against the headboard and his fingers slid into Aleeme’s dark
hair and massaged his chesnari’s scalp. It was a gesture that introduced the
past to the present. In the past, he had often reached out to Aleeme that way
and to be able to do so again was nothing short of a miracle. “Flick is right.
We need to heal… *You* need to heal.”
Aleeme searched
Azriel’s eyes. “About Tarot… Will you accept him…?”
Aleeme didn’t
have to finish his question since Azriel understood what he was trying to say.
“I will accept him as my son. I will adopt him. He sprang from you and that is
reason enough for me to welcome him into our lives once the time is right.”
Ulaume stared
at them with his mouth wide open. They continued to surprise him. “You really
want to adopt Ponclast’s offspring?”
Azriel
flinched. He knew that Aleeme would never be able to host again so Tarot would
be the only harling his chesnari would ever have. “Yes, I do. The harling isn’t
to blame.” Accepting Tarot as his own would help heal Aleeme and tighten their
relationship. He was determined to do whatever was necessary to make sure
Aleeme healed and was happy again.
~~~
Swift was
nervous when Sheeva guided him to the larger room Azriel and Aleeme shared
these days. The two recovering hara had requested to be close to each other and
nohar had had the heart to deny them.
“Please remember that they are still emotionally unbalanced. Don’t be surprised
if one of them bursts out into tears,” the healer reminded him.
“We
understand.” Seel felt like he was ready to burst into tears as well. His heart
thundered like mad when they reached the door to Azriel and Aleeme’s room.
“What do we do? How do we act? Do we ask…?”
Sheeva shook
his head. “Hold back on any questions you might have and let Azriel and Aleeme
decide what they want to share. I watched them during the last few days and
they seem to confide in each other and nohar else – not even Flick or Ulaume.
Maybe it is best that way. Azriel and Aleeme lived it and know what the other
one went through.”
Swift nodded
once. “We won’t pressure them.” He knew better than that. “Can we see them
now?”
Opening the
door, Sheeva gestured for them to enter the room. Ulaume and Flick were already
present and looked up smiling at Swift and Seel. “You’re here,” Flick said and
went to welcome them.
Swift’s gaze
however was fixed on Azriel, who sat in a comfortable chair near Aleeme’s bed.
Although his son was wrapped up in a warm blanket, Azriel didn’t look that
vulnerable anymore. The eyes were alert and Azriel’s expression brightened at
seeing them. Seel beat him to his son as the hostling fell onto his knees so he
could hold and hug Azriel. Seel didn’t speak, but just held Azriel close.
Changing
direction, Swift's gaze moved from Azriel to Aleeme. He had seen Aleeme in his
catatonic state and smiled at seeing the vivid light in the green eyes. “Hello
Aleeme.” Aleeme returned his smile and Swift looked back to Seel and Azriel.
Since his chesnari had had the time to hold Azriel close, he wanted a moment of
his son’s time too. Seel sensed this and released Azriel from his hold before
taking a step aside so Swift could take his place.
“I can stand,”
Azriel muttered, not wanting them to kneel in order to hold him. It looked
awkward and he wanted to show them that he was improving.
Swift placed
his hands around his son’s waist and steadied him when he rose from the chair.
Once he had Azriel locked in an embrace, he allowed himself to believe that
this was really happening. He hadn’t seen so much will to live in his son’s
eyes for over a year. “You look so much better. Seel and I couldn’t believe the
good news when we heard it. We had to see for ourselves that you had improved
and that Aleeme was responsive again.”
Azriel soaked
up all the attention his father was bestowing on him. “It is good to see the
two of you too.” He rested his chin on Swift’s shoulder so he could also look
Seel in the eye. “I am sorry that we caused you pain, but we needed time to
work through everything that had happened.” And he had been better at doing
that than Aleeme. Aleeme carried the deepest emotional scars. “I am glad you
are here now.” He reached for Seel and drew his hostling into the embrace.
Holding them both, he smiled and soaked up their love.
~~~
During the next
few days, Sheeva and his healers worked with Azriel and Aleeme on healing their
physical bodies. Mending the mind was something only Azriel and Aleeme could do
and Sheeva never coerced them into talking because he saw that they were
improving emotionally as well as physically. Ulaume, Flick, Swift, and Seel
also stayed close and spent the remaining hours of the day with their sons. The
nights belonged solely to Azriel and Aleeme, who slept in each other’s arms.
Aruna was something they were hesitant to think about since Aleeme had been
hurt so badly by Ponclast, but they both knew that if they wanted to fully
recover they had to face that problem one day...but not yet.
It was already
evening and Ulaume and Flick were keeping Aleeme company.
Swift and Seel had taken Azriel out for a walk in the gardens since they wanted
to build their son’s stamina and that gave Aleeme a chance to talk to his
father and hostling without Azriel present.
Aleeme felt
stronger these days. Sheeva had taught him a way to lock out the memories that
hurt him the most and, once he had perfected that method, no ugly images could
sneak up on him. That helped him recover more quickly. Seated on a chair near
the fireplace, Aleeme gazed at his hostling sitting opposite him. Ulaume sat
next to Aleeme and his father had taken hold of his hand. Flick was smiling at
him and Aleeme sensed his hostling’s happiness. He hoped that he wasn’t going
to ruin that feeling by asking Flick some questions. “You said you saw Tarot in
Lisia’s mind.”
Their son’s
unexpected remark startled both Flick and Ulaume, who had been enjoying the
peaceful moment. After exchanging a look with Ulaume, Flick replied, “We did.
Lisia showed us.”
“Will you show
me too?” Aleeme had to know what had happened to his son. “Please show me in my
mind?” Since they were so closely related, sharing breath wasn’t necessary and
Flick carefully poured a number of images into his mind. Aleeme closed his eyes
to savor the mental pictures and a smile appeared on his face. Flick had only
shown him the happy moments his hostling had encountered in Lisia’s mind and
Aleeme was aware of that. He knew that the harling must have been a mess when
he had arrived at the
Ulaume squeezed
his son’s hand. If Aleeme wanted to be reconciled with Tarot, he would do his
best to see that happen.
~~~
Swift and Seel
had both claimed one of their son’s hands, so Azriel walked in-between them as
they made their way through the gardens. Azriel had been strangely quiet that
day and neither Swift nor Seel wanted to interrupt his thoughts. If Azriel
wanted to hear their opinion, their son would ask for it.
Azriel had been
biting his bottom lip before suddenly asking, “Why didn’t Cobweb come with
you?”
Swift drew in a
deep breath. “He didn’t want to overwhelm you. He thought that having the two
of us around would exhaust you as it was.”
Azriel could
tell it was a lie the moment Swift had replied. “What’s the real reason?”
Swift looked at
Seel, who just shrugged his shoulders, silently saying that his chesnari should
make the decision whether to tell Aleeme or not. In the end, Swift made his
decision and explained, “Cobweb didn’t come because he feels guilty.” His son
looked at him quizzically and Swift felt forced to add, “Cobweb didn’t want
Tarot around and sent him to Lisia. I don’t think Cobweb likes the idea of
having that harling around.”
Azriel tensed.
“Isn’t that mine and Aleeme’s decision to make?”
Swift nodded.
“Cobweb reacted impulsively. You know what he is like.”
“He sent Tarot
away?” Azriel blinked. He knew Cobweb as a loving har. “I don’t understand why
he did that.”
Swift hated
having to be blunt with Azriel. “He didn’t want to raise a child created during
pelki at Forever.” He involuntarily gasped when
Azriel freed himself of their hold. Both Swift and Seel let go and watched
Azriel angrily walk away from them.
Once there was
some distance between them, Azriel turned and stared at them. “You weren’t
there. You don’t know what happened.” And he certainly wasn’t going to tell
them the details. “But you need to know that Aleeme accepted that harling. He
birthed that pearl. He *is* Tarot’s hostling and neither he, nor I, blame the
child for Ponclast’s actions.”
“I am sorry
that it took us so long to understand that,” Swift responded. “Let us make
amends.”
Azriel, feeling
tired after that emotional outburst, bowed his head. “I don’t believe there is
much you can do. Aleeme and I must heal ourselves and we are working on that.”
He raised his gaze again. “It would definitely help if you were more supportive
of the fact that Aleeme and I want to form a family eventually and that we want
Tarot to be a part of that. Aleeme is barren, Swift. He can never host a pearl
again. Tarot is the only harling he will have hosted. Yes, I can host any
pearls we might create, but I am not sure we will ever create a pearl again.
What happened in that room shaped us.”
“Therefore we
found it hard to imagine that you wanted Tarot close,” Seel offered.
“That is where
you went wrong. Tarot is as much a part of this as Aleeme and I am. He belongs
with us. You should have brought him to us after…” Azriel swallowed hard. “I
need to be alone for a moment.” Walking away from them, he headed for a
secluded part of the garden. Their conversation had caused his emotions to go berserk.
~~~
Ulaume, Flick,
Swift, and Seel gathered in one of the rooms to discuss their course of action.
They had been in Immanion with their sons for a month and both Azriel and
Aleeme were recovering. Azriel had made the biggest progress and, except for
some added lines on his brow and around his eyes, he seemed to be reverting
back to the ‘old’ Azriel with each passing day. Aleeme however needed more
time. The har was able to get out of bed and walk short distances, but still
needed somehar at his side at all times. It was Aleeme’s mental state they
worried about the most. Repeatedly, Aleeme had voiced the request that sounded
more and more like a demand as time passed by: he should be allowed to see his
harling.
Now the four of
them had gathered to decide what to do on that matter. Should they ask Lisia to
bring Tarot to Immanion? Should they take Azriel and Aleeme to the
“Is it a good
idea to stray from the original plan?” Seel asked at last. “We are going to
visit Lisia and Tarot in another eight months. Maybe it would be best if we
waited.”
Ulaume
disagreed however. “Just being able to talk about Tarot is helping Aleeme heal.
Why set back his recovery by making him wait?”
Swift remarked
thoughtfully, ”Azriel says he has accepted Tarot in
their lives, but can we be really sure he doesn’t harbor any resentment?
Actually seeing the harling might have a negative effect on Azriel and I don’t
want to take any risks.”
Seel quickly
nodded. “We can’t forget the fact that this harling was conceived during pelki.” Like his chesnari, he was inclined to keep Azriel,
Aleeme, and Tarot apart.
“I can’t
believe I am hearing this!”
Four heads
turned in the direction of the doorway where Azriel stood. The har was strong
enough to move about by himself and had been exploring
this part of the palace. Dressed in a comfortable shirt and a long skirt with
his hair once more shining darkly, he looked like he had never been sick.
“Please you
must understand that we only want what is best for you!” Swift responded.
“Or for you,”
Azriel retorted from between gritted teeth. “It is you who has a problem with
Tarot’s heritage!”
“And you
don’t?” Seel questioned softly. “Doesn’t it matter to you that Ponclast is
Tarot’s father?”
Resolution
appeared on Azriel’s face when he answered, “It matters more to me that Aleeme
is the harling’s hostling. Why can’t you understand that? Aleeme will never
host a pearl again. Ponclast damaged him! No matter what you do or say, Tarot
is Aleeme’s son and you can try to keep us apart, but you will fail. The moment
Aleeme and I are able to leave unaided we will travel to the
Ulaume nodded
to show he understood. “But please bear in mind what is best for Tarot. He has
found a family in the
Azriel sighed.
“Aren’t you listening? We want to see him! We want to talk to him and touch
him! We need time as well!”
Swift knew he
had lost the fight and conceded. “What do you want to happen?” They had been
wrong in wanting to make a decision without involving Aleeme and Azriel. The
two hara had to make this decision and not the four of them!
“We want to go
to the
Swift wrung his
hands as he nervously asked, “Do you want to raise the harling at Forever?”
Azriel
flinched, but then straightened his shoulders. He had heard more of their
conversation than they thought. “If Cobweb doesn’t want Tarot at Forever, then
we will go with Ulaume and Flick.” Watching the couple, he asked, “You will
allow this, won’t you?” He was under the impression that Ulaume and Flick were
more accepting of the matter. The two hara didn’t disappoint him and nodded.
Shifting his gaze from Flick and Ulaume to Swift and Seel, he stated, “You have
one month to get used to the idea that Aleeme and I will raise the harling.
Talk to Cobweb and tell him about our plans. If he can’t accept Tarot living at
Forever, we will live with Flick and Ulaume.” Azriel closed the door behind him
with a bang and then leaned against the wall. The confrontation had drained him
more than he wanted them to know.
~~~
“What’s wrong?”
Aleeme asked upon Azriel’s return to their rooms. Azriel radiated anger and
confusion. He extended his arms and caught Azriel in his hold when the other
har sat down on the bed close to him.
“They don’t
want us to see Tarot.”
Aleeme
swallowed convulsively having expected as much. “It is hard for them to
understand why we want Tarot with us.” A connection had formed between the
three of them in their prison and Ponclast had been their mutual enemy. In his
mind, he saw Tarot come to his defense when Ponclast was trying to force
himself upon him. The harling had been too small, too weak, and without proper
means to defend his hostling and Aleeme had felt guilty for being unable to
protect Tarot from Ponclast’s wrath. “They think he is a monster. I saw it in
Seel’s mind.”
Azriel pulled
Aleeme close and they rocked together. “I finally found out what had happened
to Ponclast.” Their parents hadn’t thought them fit to know yet.
Aleeme raised
his head and looked deeply into Azriel’s eyes. “Is he dead?” He hoped so!
“He was
banished to another realm. It is a one way route so he can never come back. We
don’t have to fear him ever again.”
“How did you
find out?” The news reassured Aleeme that they were safe.
“I asked
“Do you think
they will let us go?” Aleeme loved them for worrying about them, but at the
moment, their care felt suffocating.
“If they don’t
come around I will ask
“That’s
Cobweb’s influence on them.” Aleeme rested his head against Azriel’s chest and
listened to the calm and steady beat of his chesnari’s heart. “I want Tarot
back,
Azriel kissed
his chesnari’s brow and sighed deeply. “I will make sure the three of us are
united again.”
~~~
That evening,
Swift and Flick visited their sons. They had judged it wise to go with only two
instead of four. That way, Azriel and Aleeme might not feel outnumbered. It had
caused Flick pain to realize that they had unwillingly hurt the traumatized
hara. “May we enter?” he asked as Swift and he stood in the doorway.
Azriel looked
up and asked, “What do you want?” He prepared himself for another confrontation
and felt Aleeme tremble in his arms. They hadn’t moved yet and were still
curled up on the bed.
“We talked,”
Swift said and gave his son a look that begged Azriel to forgive him. “We
realized we had made a mistake. We don’t have the right to keep Tarot away from
you, regardless of Cobweb’s feelings in the matter.”
Aleeme sighed
in relief. “You will support us then?”
Flick nodded.
“We want to help you heal and if that means accepting Tarot in our lives we
will do that. We realized that he is just another victim. He doesn’t deserve to
be punished for Ponclast’s crimes.”
Aleeme locked
eyes with his hostling. “You might want to send a message to Lisia that we will
visit in a month. We don’t want to startle anyhar and certainly not somehar who
cared for Tarot.”
Azriel added,
“Tarot should also know that we are coming to see him. He needs to be
prepared.”
Flick nodded
again. “Lor and I will take care of that.” Maybe one of them could visit the
~~~
Aleeme worked
hard to get back into shape. He started by taking short walks aided by Azriel
or Flick and Ulaume. He needed his chesnari, hostling, and father
the most. Although Swift and Seel offered to spend time with him, Aleeme
gracefully declined while suggesting that they should spend time with Azriel
instead, which they eventually did. That gave Aleeme a chance to enjoy Flick
and Ulaume’s company.
Flick and
Ulaume felt immensely proud of their son who was fighting for his recovery.
Each day, Aleeme managed to take one more step, succeeded in eating more, and
was growing stronger as the end of the month quickly approached.
One evening,
Azriel, Aleeme, Ulaume, and Flick were sitting together talking softly and even
laughing occasionally when somehar brought up an amusing event from their
childhood. Azriel and Aleeme still didn’t confide in anyhar outside of each
other regarding their past torment and Flick and Ulaume had accepted that.
Aleeme was
seated close to Azriel and rubbing his chesnari’s fingers while looking
dreamily into the fire. The fire place was constantly lit not just for heat,
but also because Aleeme loved looking at the flames. “Somehar needs to go the
Flick nodded.
“Lor and I discussed this.”
“What did you
decide?” Azriel pressed closer to his chesnari and closed his eyes. The bright
light of the flames hurt his eyes if he stared at them for too long.
“Lor will visit
Lisia and talk to Tarot.” Flick had wanted to go too, but the fact that Tarot
had inherited some traits from Ulaume made Ulaume the best choice. They could
connect in a way Flick might not be able to. Their hair would show their
kinship and Flick hoped that Tarot would instantly take a liking to Ulaume.
“That is a good
plan.” Aleeme smiled gratefully at his father. “The two of you seem to have
fewer problems accepting this than Swift and Seel.”
“They are doing
their best to accept this,” Flick responded. “But it is different for them.
Tarot isn’t their high harling.”
Azriel nodded.
“I understand that, but I still wish they would welcome Tarot in their lives.”
“They will
eventually. Give them time. It was quite a shock to them to find out that you
love Tarot and then there is Cobweb who influenced them unintentionally.”
Ulaume rested his upper body against Flick’s as he leaned in closer. He savored
this moment of peace and wished it would never end, but he had to leave the
next day. He would use one of the sedim to make his journey to the
TBC
Part
7
Lisia didn’t
know what to make of the fact that Ulaume had announced that he was visiting.
He hadn’t expected Ulaume to come to the
“Did the
message say why Ulaume was coming here?” Pansea was of two minds about this. He
wanted Tarot to be reunited with his family, but at the same time, he didn’t
want to lose the harling.
Lisia placed a
hand on Pansea’s shoulder. “You knew this could happen.” They had both known
that one day Tarot’s kin might get involved.
“For Tarot’s
sake I hope Ulaume brings good news. He deserves that.” Pansea looked at the
lightening that colored the sky, announcing the sedu’s
arrival. He steeled himself and tried to prepare himself for every possible
outcome.
~~~
Ulaume felt
equally nervous when he walked up to Lisia and Pansea. These hara had taken
Tarot in and were still caring for him. What had Cobweb been thinking in
sending the harling away? “Greetings,” he said and inclined his head. His hair
moved about wildly, showing his nervousness. Pansea’s breath caught at seeing
the hair come alive. It was obvious that Tarot and Ulaume were related.
“Greetings,
Ulaume,” Lisia replied formally. “You are most welcome here.”
Ulaume sensed
tension, discomfort, and nervousness oozing from Lisia and Pansea. He
understood why they felt apprehensive and wanted to take their worries away. “I
am here to talk about Tarot, not to take him away.”
Pansea sighed
in relief. “You must understand...I was worried you would demand we hand him
over.”
Ulaume smiled
warmly. It was obvious that Lisia and Pansea cared deeply about Tarot. “I am
here to talk. I would love to meet with Tarot at one point, but mostly I am
here to prepare the way for my son.”
Lisia’s eyes
widened slightly. “Aleeme wants to come to the
“Aleeme wants
to see Tarot very much. He has recovered sufficiently to travel to the
“I want what is
best for the harling,” Pansea answered and swept his unruly, red hair back
behind his ears. “I don’t want him traumatized again. It took him a long time
to get over his imprisonment and the abuse he suffered at Ponclast’s hands.”
“The fact that
Cobweb sent him here instead of taking care of the harling himself tells me how
unwelcome Tarot is in that family. We never told Tarot the truth, but I believe
he has sensed the fact that somehar important didn’t want him and that it was
the reason why he was sent here,” Lisia added.
“Cobweb made a
mistake. He probably realizes that now.” The last time Ulaume and Swift had
talked, the Parsic leader had told him that Cobweb regretted ignoring Tarot.
“Everyhar needed time to come to terms with what had happened to Azriel and
Aleeme.”
“You probably
want to freshen up and rest,” Pansea remarked. “Would you agree to wait until
tomorrow to meet with Tarot? That would give me time to prepare him for your
visit.”
Ulaume nodded.
“I have no intention of rushing you. Tomorrow will do.” Although he was dying
to meet his high har, Ulaume knew that being patient was the smart thing to do.
“Thank you for caring for him,” he said and looked first at Lisia and then at
Pansea. “That means a lot to me, Aleeme, and Azriel, that you are raising him
as your own.”
“It is the
least we can do.” Pansea felt reassured by Ulaume’s manner. “I will bring Tarot
to you in the morning. Then you can talk to him. Prepare to deal with a very
sensitive and bright harling.”
Ulaume grinned.
“I will.”
~~~
Cobweb paced
Terzian’s old study restlessly. Since Swift and Seel had gone, he was in charge
of Forever. But he didn’t feel up to the job at the moment and it was Snake who
was making sure everything ran smoothly at the mansion. Cobweb was preoccupied.
His thoughts continued to spin around Tarot and his decision to send the
harling to Lisia. Had he made a mistake back then?
“You must stop
torturing yourself this way,” Snake ordered and curled his arms around his
chesnari. “You did what you thought was right.”
“But that
doesn’t change the fact that I made a huge mistake.” Cobweb bowed his head in
defeat. “How can I live with myself knowing that I slowed down their recovery?”
Snake pulled
Cobweb close and whispered in his ear, “If this is so important to you then go
to Immanion and explain yourself to Azriel and Aleeme.”
Cobweb
shivered. “I am not sure I can face them.”
“Do you want me
to come with you? Tyson and Moon can take over our duties for a short while.
They are ready for that.”
Cobweb turned
in the embrace and gazed lovingly into Snake’s eyes. “If I do this then I have
to do this alone.”
Snake pressed a
kiss onto Cobweb’s brow. “I understand, Cobweb. I really do.”
~~~
Ulaume spent
the evening in Lisia’s company and got to know the hostling much better. Lisia
told him the history of the place and the part he had played when the structure
had still been a breeding facility. Ulaume thought he understood why Cobweb had
chosen to send Tarot there. Maybe it hadn’t been solely because Cobweb hadn’t
wanted the harling at Forever. Maybe Cobweb had thought sending Tarot to Lisia
had been for the best.
“Please excuse
my curiosity, but did you host yourself?” Lisia had offered Ulaume much of his
personal story and was curious to learn more about the other har.
“I did. I
hosted our second pearl. Our second son’s name is Orien.” Ulaume smiled.
Lisia returned
the smile. Ulaume was a very lucky har to have hosted only once. Lisia would
never forget the pain he had been in when he had delivered his last few pearls.
“And what about Aleeme? Has he improved?” Why else
would Ulaume be there?
“He did.”
Ulaume shifted on his chair, reached for his tea, and blew onto the surface in
order to cool it. “I visited him after the two of us talked and when I
mentioned Tarot’s name, Aleeme reacted. He had been locked in a catatonic state
ever since
“Tarot’s name
worked a miracle then.” Lisia sipped his coffee. The Gelaming had introduced
the drink to them and Lisia savored it. “You will find that Tarot is a very
charming harling. I can tell that he inherited your animated hair. His hair
moves about like yours.”
“I gathered as
much.” Ulaume drew in a deep breath. “I feel restless because I have to wait
until tomorrow to see Tarot.”
“Pansea needs
that much time to prepare Tarot.” Lisia offered Ulaume one of the sandwiches
the househara had brought earlier that evening. “What are your plans where
Tarot is concerned?”
“I shall be
honest with you. It is Aleeme and Azriel’s intention to bond with Tarot.”
Lisia inclined
his head thoughtfully. “I understand why Aleeme wants to bond with Tarot, but
why Azriel? He didn’t father the pearl.”
“Azriel wants
to adopt Tarot if the harling lets him. I believe the two of them want to raise
Tarot.” Ulaume watched Lisia cautiously. “Do you think that will cause
problems? I know that Pansea and Skye are taking care of Tarot at the moment.”
“You did me the
courtesy of being honest and I will do the same. Giving up Tarot will cause
Pansea and Skye much pain, but they will step back because Aleeme is Tarot’s
hostling. Personally I believe that Tarot should be given a choice in the
matter. If he wants to stay with Pansea and Skye, Aleeme should accept that.”
“Such a
decision would hurt Aleeme and Azriel, but I believe they would accept that.
Tarot’s well-being is their first priority.”
Lisia smiled at
that. It sounded like Aleeme was a wise har. “Honestly, I believe that Tarot
will choose to live with Aleeme because he never stopped longing for his
hostling. Tarot still seeks me out on a regular basis to ask me if there has
been any news on Aleeme. He loves his hostling.”
“And his
hostling loves him,” Ulaume replied. Wouldn’t it be amazing if everything
worked out for Aleeme and Tarot?
~~~
Cobweb arrived
in Immanion in the dead of night. Snake had sent a message ahead to Swift so
that the har was there to welcome Cobweb to the city. Swift was surprised to
see such a deep frown on his hostling’s brow. The eyes were dark and brooding.
“Why are you here?” Snake hadn’t given him any details.
“Can I talk to
Azriel and Aleeme? Or are they asleep already?”
Swift looked at
the window that belonged to Azriel and Aleeme’s apartment. “The light is still
on.”
“Will they
agree to see me at this late hour?”
“Can’t it wait
until tomorrow?”
Cobweb shook his head. “I would prefer to do this now.”
Swift raised a
hand and gestured for his hostling to step into the next corridor. “In that
case, follow me.”
~~~
“Cobweb is
here? But why…?” Azriel frowned and looked at Aleeme to gauge his chesnari’s
reaction. Aleeme looked puzzled, but at the same time also curious.
“I believe I
know why he is here,” Swift answered as he patted the back of his son’s hand.
“He has come to apologize.”
“For sending
Tarot away,” Azriel murmured and then exchanged another look with Aleeme. He
wanted Aleeme to decide if they should tell Cobweb to enter or not.
Aleeme needed a
moment to think everything over. He then looked at Swift and asked, “What
impression does he make on you? You know him best.”
“He wants to
make amends. He knows what he did was wrong.” Swift pleaded on his hostling’s
behalf. “I believe he made that decision because he thought it was right for
the harling.”
Aleeme nodded.
“You can tell Cobweb to come inside. We will talk to him.” Aleeme planned on
letting Cobweb do most of the talking though.
~~~
Cobweb felt ill
at ease as he entered the apartment. Swift had told him about the progress the
two traumatized hara had made, but he was still stunned to see their alert
gazes. Aleeme was fully aware of his presence and the other har’s mind felt
surprisingly strong. The last time he had tried to reach out to Aleeme, the har
had been lost to him. His next look was for Azriel and his emotions got the
better of him as he saw his high har take in his appearance. Cobweb had wanted
to keep his distance until he had apologized, but he rushed forward to draw
Azriel into a hug.
Azriel allowed
it, knowing how much Cobweb loved him. He also realized that he couldn’t stay
cross with Cobweb for he loved the other har too much to do that. Stunned,
Azriel felt something wet against his cheek and found that Cobweb was weeping
softly. “Don’t cry, Cobweb. We are getting better.”
The mystical
har forced himself to get a grip on his emotions
again. “I am sorry. I am sorry that I made the wrong decision back then.” He
bowed his head and didn’t dare to meet their gazes yet. “It’s true. I ran away
from my responsibility. I should have taken the harling under my wing, but I
didn’t feel up to it. I thought that Lisia would make a much better caregiver.”
Azriel rubbed
Cobweb’s back. “I understand why you did it.” After exchanging a look with
Aleeme and receiving a nod from his chesnari, he added, “We forgive you. You
can let go of your guilt.”
Cobweb wiped
away his tears and tentatively made eye contact with his high har. “I had hoped
you would understand.” His gaze traveled from Azriel’s face to Aleeme’s. “If I
had known that having Tarot close would have aided your recovery I would have
made sure he was there, but I thought…”
“You don’t need
to say it,” Aleeme interrupted softly. He didn’t want to hear the words again.
He knew by now that they had expected him to hate the harling. “Ulaume is
speaking with Lisia at the moment and he will meet Tarot in the morning. In two
days, Azriel and I will travel to the
Cobweb
swallowed hard. Aleeme had said ‘their' son. That meant Azriel had adopted
Tarot as his own.
“If you want to
join us, you are welcome to do so.” Aleeme realized he should keep the party to
a minimum, but too many hara had an interest in Tarot these days. “Flick will
also accompany us.” Swift and Seel would meet Tarot at a later stage, allowing
for Flick and Ulaume to talk to the harling first. Tarot wasn’t their high
harling after all.
Cobweb had
wiped away his tears and even managed a smile. “I would love to accompany you.”
It warmed his heart that they had forgiven him so readily. He hadn’t expected
that.
Aleeme nodded
once. In two days time, Flick, Cobweb, Azriel, and he would travel to the
~~~
Tarot knew
something was wrong when Pansea wanted to talk to him alone. He didn’t want to
part from Lunar even for the shortest amount of time, but Pansea insisted that
they talk in private. They even went into the adults’ bedroom so they wouldn’t
be disturbed by any unexpected visitors. Pansea and Skye’s bedroom was off
limits to the harlings most of the time, but that didn’t stop them from
listening at the door and giggling every time the two hara took aruna. “What’s
wrong?” Tarot asked as he balanced on Pansea’s knee. “Did I do something
wrong?” He had been good so far to his knowledge and had kept Lunar and himself
out of trouble.
“You did
nothing wrong.” In order to reassure the harling, Pansea placed a loving kiss
onto the dark hair, which reacted by caressing his face in turn. Pansea didn’t
think it was a conscious reaction on the harling’s part. The hair just had a
life of its own. “A visitor has arrived.”
Tarot’s eyes
took on a feverish gleam. “Is it my hostling?”
Pansea smiled.
Tarot had never hidden his love for Aleeme or the fact that he was hoping his
hostling would come for him. “Not quite. It is your high father, Ulaume.”
Tarot blinked
in surprise. He didn’t know that name. “Not Aleeme?” he asked in
disappointment.
“Not yet.”
Pansea knew Tarot would understand the hint.
Tarot’s
features cleared at once and the harling smiled brightly. “He will be coming
for me then?”
Pansea nodded.
“But your high father wants to talk to you first.”
“Can I talk to
him now?” Tarot tried to hop off of Pansea’s knee, but the har caught him
before Tarot’s feet touched the floor.
“I will take
you to Ulaume in the morning. It is already late and harlings as young as you
should be in bed and asleep by now.” The problem however was that Tarot was
much too excited to go to sleep. Maybe he should have waited with telling the
harling until the morning, but then he might have overwhelmed Tarot. “You can
stay up with Skye and me for another hour.”
“Can Lunar stay up too?” It was rare that the adults allowed them
to stay up late and Tarot wanted Lunar to profit from it as well.
Knowing that
saying no would only cause more upheaval, Pansea nodded. “He can keep you
company.” He hoped that Skye didn’t mind him making such a decision.
~~~
Under normal
circumstances Skye would never allow Lunar to stay up so late, but for that
night he made an exception. Pansea and Skye had amused the harlings by playing
games with them and within the hour Tarot and Lunar had grown sleepy. They had
placed the harlings in bed and had then stood back, watching them.
“I don’t want
to lose Tarot,” Skye murmured eventually. “But I also realize that Aleeme has
every right to take him to Immanion with him.” He was old and experienced
enough to deal with losing Tarot to Aleeme and so was Pansea. When the
Pansea curled
an arm around his chesnari and kissed Skye’s temple. “Please don’t worry too
much. We don’t even know what Aleeme’s plans are. Maybe if we approach this
situation in the right way we can convince him to live at the
Skye raised an
eyebrow. “You have a plan?”
Pansea grinned
conspiratorially. “I might have.”
~~~
Ulaume felt
excited when Lisia guided him into the hostling’s study. Tarot and Ulaume would
meet on ‘neutral’ grounds so to speak. “I can’t believe I am this nervous. I
have seen Tarot from what Flick found in your mind and I know what he is like,
but still…” Still he found it hard to keep his trembling hands under control.
“Tarot has
grown since Flick and I shared breath.” Lisia seated himself behind his desk
and pushed himself deeper into the comfort of his chair. “And after meeting
Tarot, I imagine meeting Lunar will be next on your agenda.”
Ulaume frowned.
“Lunar? Isn’t that the name of Skye’s son?” Why would he want to meet the
harling?
“Tarot and
Lunar are as close as brothers.” Lisia felt it was only right to prepare Ulaume
for the possible problems that might arise if they took Tarot away from the
Ulaume hadn’t
expected to hear anything like that. This might complicate matters. A knock on
the door caught his attention and Ulaume turned around so he could see his high
har the moment Tarot walked into the room.
“Enter,” Lisia
called out and rose from behind his desk.
Pansea opened
the door and then stepped inside. Tarot had turned shy during the last few
minutes and dragged his feet, so Pansea gave him a little push. Batting his
eyes at the strange har, Tarot first noticed the lively hair. He instantly made
the connection that they were indeed related and took another step closer to
Ulaume. Shuffling his feet and wringing his hands, he stood in front of the
adult, who looked tall and a bit intimidating.
Ulaume’s heart
almost burst with recognition where the harling was concerned. It had taken him
only one look to realize that Tarot was his high har indeed. The dark hair was
already moving restlessly and strands were trying to reach out to his. Sinking
down onto a knee, Ulaume smiled and raised a hand. He gestured for the harling
to approach. “My name is Ulaume, but you can call me Lor if that is easier for
you.” He fought back the tears that formed in his eyes. He was probing Tarot’s
mind and found only interest, innocence, and affection in the harling’s
thoughts. Ponclast’s evil hadn’t touched the child.
Tarot blushed
weakly and when Pansea gave him another gentle shove, he ended up standing in
front of Ulaume. “Are you my high father?” He liked the har. He liked the way
the har’s hair moved and watched with interest how strands of their hair
touched and then twined around each other. “You have funny hair too. Just like
me.”
Ulaume returned
the giddy smile Tarot was giving him. “I am afraid you inherited your hair from
me.” He wanted to embrace his high son, but wasn’t sure he would be rushing
Tarot. It was best to go slowly. “Aleeme’s hair isn’t like that. It must have
skipped a generation.” How would the harling react to hearing Aleeme’s name?
Tarot’s eyes
attained a feverish gleam once more and excitedly waved his hands at Ulaume.
“Did you see my hostling? Did you speak to him? Is he getting better?”
Ulaume
swallowed hard at the love in Tarot’s mind which the harling bore for Aleeme.
Carefully, he rested a hand on the harling’s shoulder and nodded his head.
“Aleeme has recovered and will join us shortly. Do you want to meet him?”
Ulaume wasn’t prepared for Tarot’s reaction when the harling excitedly jumped
at him and wrapped his arms around his neck.
“Can I? Please?
Can I? I asked Lis about Aleeme, but he told me my hostling was still too weak
to see me!”
“He was ill for
a very long time,” Ulaume replied and carefully hugged his high son close. To
his surprise he felt tendrils of Tarot’s mind probe his. He had never heard of
a harling being able to do that at such a tender age. It did serve to remind
him that Tarot was no ordinary harling. Ponclast’s power had been conferred
onto the harling, but Tarot didn’t seem to be aware of that. “He will arrive
tomorrow evening.”
That
information sent Tarot into a tizzy. His hostling was coming for him! Aleeme
would arrive the next day! He was so excited that he started to shake like a
leaf.
“Calm down,
little one,” Ulaume ordered and sent Tarot calming thoughts. “Aleeme might have
recovered, but he can’t deal with stress yet. You will have to be on your best
behavior.” Hopefully that would settle the harling’s nerves.
“I always am!”
Tarot replied indignantly.
“That’s true,”
Pansea agreed. He forced a smile onto his face though he would have preferred
to snatch Tarot from Ulaume’s arms. He had to be strong though and carry out
their plan. “He always behaves and keeps Lunar safe.”
Ulaume
recognized the name. “Lunar is the name of your…”
“Lunar is my
best friend in the whole world.” Suddenly a defiant look appeared on Tarot’s
face. “You are not going to take him away from me, are you? I won’t allow it!
Lunar belongs with me!”
The vehemence
that accompanied the harling’s words stunned all of the adults. They had known
that Tarot and Lunar were close, but had never heard a harling say something
like that. Tarot looked ready to do battle if it meant that he could keep Lunar
close.
“I have no
intention of separating the two of you,” Ulaume assured the upset harling. But
inwardly he was pondering the situation which had just become complicated. He
hadn’t considered the fact that Tarot might not want to leave his adopted
family.
TBC
Part
8
Ulaume sat on
the floor of Lisia’s study and was playing with his high son. Lisia’s office
was filled with stuffed animals, materials to draw, and harbored other games
which harlings might like to play. He had spent the last hour playing and had
gotten to know Tarot a bit better. For a harling of nineteen months old he was
extremely intelligent.
Someone knocked
on the door and Tarot turned his head toward the doorway. Then he grabbed a
strand of Ulaume’s hair and tugged at it. “Now you are going to meet Skye and
Lunar!”
Curious, Ulaume
watched the hostling and harling that entered the room. It was easy to see that
they were related. Except for the different eye color, Skye and Lunar’s
features were identical. The harling would become quite a beauty judging by the
way Skye looked. Tarot grabbed Ulaume's hand and pulled him along and Ulaume
had no choice but to get to his feet and follow his high son. Suddenly Tarot
let go and the harling pulled Lunar into a tight embrace.
Ulaume smiled
at Skye in the hope of soothing him since he sensed the hostling’s tension.
Watching Tarot hug Lunar, Ulaume understood Skye’s concern. It would be cruel
to separate the two harlings. If Aleeme was really determined to become Tarot’s
hostling, his son might have to make the
Skye gracefully
inclined his head. “Thank you. You’re very kind.” One look at Ulaume had told
Skye that the other har had sensed the connection between the two harlings.
Ulaume would be their ally and not their enemy.
~~~
“I wish you
sweet dreams, Tarot.” Ulaume pressed a kiss onto his high har’s brow. The next
moment, Tarot pulled Lunar in front of Ulaume and the look which Tarot shot
Ulaume was that his high har expected him to kiss Lunar
goodnight too. “And you too, Lunar.” The two harlings were opposites
character-wise Ulaume had already realized. Tarot was outgoing, expressive, and
spoke his mind. Lunar was quiet and kept to himself mostly. Ulaume pressed a
kiss onto Lunar’s brow and realized the difference didn’t end there. Tarot’s
brow had felt hot, feverish even and Lunar’s was as cool as winter.
“Night Lor,”
Tarot said and then pulled Lunar along with him. The fair-haired harling gave
Ulaume a last, thoughtful look before following Tarot into the corridor. Skye
was going to take them back to their apartment while Pansea would stay to
answer any questions Ulaume might have about the harlings.
Ulaume waited
until Skye had closed the door behind him and turned to Pansea. “I have never
seen two harlings so attached to each other to such a degree.”
Pansea
shrugged. “They formed an instant friendship. We introduced Tarot to a few
harlings his age thinking they would be good company. But Tarot only formed a
bond with Lunar. That connection deepened after he saved Lunar from drowning.”
Ulaume drew in
a deep breath as he considered the matter. “Separating them would be cruel. It
would damage both of them and it would take them a long time to get over the
separation.”
Relieved,
Pansea nodded. “That’s exactly what Skye and I are
worried about. We want Tarot to live with his hostling, if Aleeme wants that,
but we don’t want Tarot or Lunar hurt in the process.”
Ulaume tapped
his fingers against the armrest and suggested, “Maybe Aleeme and Azriel could
live here?” He looked to Lisia for an answer to his question. “Is that a
possibility?”
Lisia’s joy
showed when he smiled broadly. “It is my opinion that it would be best for the
harlings if Aleeme and Azriel moved into one of the apartments situated close
to Skye’s. That way the harlings can still be together.”
Ulaume liked
the idea. “Originally Aleeme and Azriel wanted to take Tarot to where Flick and
I live.”
Lisia’s
expression hardened. “Don’t tell me Cobweb still doesn’t want Tarot close?”
Ulaume’s
features contorted. “The last time we talked he still disliked that idea, yes.”
Lisia glared at
Ulaume. He wasn’t angry with his guest, but with Cobweb. “I don’t understand
Cobweb. How can he not like a harling like that?”
Ulaume
shrugged. “A lot of hara were hurt when Ponclast abducted Aleeme and Azriel and
everyhar copes with the fall out in their own way.”
Lisia knew
Ulaume was right, but that didn’t lessen his anger.
~~~
The next
morning Ulaume woke because he was no longer alone in the room. Blinking, he
elbowed himself upright and found two harlings seated on the bed next to him.
“What are you doing here?” And how had the harlings managed to get away from
Pansea and Skye’s watchful eyes? Looking at them closer, Ulaume realized that
they looked troubled. Tarot was squeezing Lunar’s hand and the blond harling
was biting his bottom lip.
“We need to
talk to you,” Tarot stated and inched closer to Lunar so he could lean his
upper body against the other harling. “We don’t want you to separate us. We
must stay together."
Ulaume moved
until he sat cross-legged and then tried to read the harlings' fears in their
minds. To his surprise, Lunar’s mind was locked tightly. Not for the first time
did he wonder about their telepathic abilities. ‘Normal’ harlings that age
didn’t possess such powers. Was that the reason why Lunar spoke so seldom? Did
Lunar and Tarot converse telepathically?
“It is easier
that way,” Lunar answered softly. His big, pale-blue eyes remained focused on Ulaume’s
face.
“You read my
mind just now.” That was quite an accomplishment for such a young harling!
“You wanted to
know so I told you.” Lunar looked defensively at Ulaume. “I won’t let Tarot
go.”
Ulaume was
touched that they cared so deeply for each other and wanted to reassure them.
“You won’t be separated. Maybe Aleeme and Azriel can move into one of these
apartments and live in the
Tarot’s
expression brightened at once. “That is a great idea! We want that don’t we,
Lunar?”
Lunar nodded as
well. “I want Tarot to have his hostling close like Skye is close to me, but I
also want him to remain my friend. We can’t be separated.”
Ulaume wondered
about Lunar’s statement, but then chalked it up to the fact that they were just
harlings and as close as brothers. “You can stay together. I promise.”
~~~
Two certain
harlings found themselves in trouble an hour later. Pansea and Skye had
searched the building for them and Skye had scolded them when they had been
found. Tarot and Lunar had had to listen to one of Skye’s lectures and had then
promised the hostling to never leave their room without telling an adult. In
the end, they were forgiven mostly because Aleeme and Azriel were going to
arrive that evening.
While the two
harlings played with Ulaume and Skye, Pansea and Lisia sat back and watched.
They knew that their lives were about to change – Tarot’s mostly, but that
would also affect the lives of Lunar, Skye, and Pansea.
~~~
In Immanion,
Flick, Cobweb, Aleeme, and Azriel readied themselves for their journey. They
had decided to use Cobweb’s and Flick’s sedim since Aleeme and Azriel had
little experience traveling the Otherlanes themselves. Aleeme would ride with
his hostling and Azriel would share Cobweb’s sedu.
Flick mounted
his sedu and then reached for his son. Aleeme wrapped his fingers around
Flick’s arm and climbed into place behind his hostling. Once Aleeme was safely
seated, Azriel took his place behind Cobweb and the four hara turned the sedim
around. A moment later, the air started to vibrate and then the four of them were
gone.
~~~
Lisia, Pansea,
and Ulaume were waiting in the courtyard for the party of visiting hara to
arrive. Lisia knew that the next few hours would shape Tarot’s future and
therefore he had suggested Ulaume talked to Aleeme and Azriel before they were
reunited. Ulaume should tell them about the close connection between Tarot and
Lunar and the solution that they had come up with to ensure that the two
harlings weren’t separated.
“They are about
to appear. I smell it in the air.” Ulaume’s eyes glowed eagerly and two sedim
took shape in front of them the next moment. Ulaume called out triumphantly
when he saw Aleeme and walked over to lift his son from the sedu’s
back. “Welcome to the
Aleeme looked
about curiously. The place looked friendly enough. Gardens and even outdoor
play pens made it very clear that harlings ruled there. A smile formed on his
face. He liked the place.
Azriel
dismounted without any help, eager to demonstrate that he had fully recovered
and immediately joined his chesnari’s side. “Did the trip tire you?” Aleeme
still looked pale and also needed to add more weight, but the har was able to
walk without any assistance.
“Not overly.”
Aleeme’s eyes searched their surroundings and once Ulaume had let go of him, he
saw Lisia for the first time. “I saw your face in a dream.” He had seen Lisia’s
face when his hostling had shared certain images with him. “You are Tarot’s
caregiver.”
Lisia inclined
his head politely. “At first I was, but now Pansea has taken over that role.
Tarot has been living with Pansea and his chesnari Skye for a year now. He has
also befriended Skye’s harling, Lunar.”
“Then I need to
thank you as well,” Aleeme stated and grabbed Pansea’s hand so he could squeeze
it. “Thank you for giving my son a home.”
Pansea blushed.
“He is a joy to have around.”
Azriel wrapped
an arm around Aleeme’s shoulders and then asked Lisia, “Can we see Tarot?”
“In a moment,”
Ulaume quickly replied. “We need to talk first.” Surprised, he noticed that
Cobweb had joined the party as well. “What are you doing here?”
Cobweb met
Ulaume’s gaze and looked apologetic. “I am here to make amends. I realized my
mistake.”
Ulaume blinked,
but didn’t say anything. “We can discuss the past later. First we need to talk
about the present and the future.” Leading the party into the building, Ulaume
and Lisia guided them into the apartment which had been readied for them.
“What do we
need to talk about?” Aleeme asked as he sat down on the couch. “Why can’t I see
Tarot right away?”
“Because there
are some things you need to know,” Lisia explained. He pulled up a chair and
sat down close to Aleeme, who was once more flanked by Azriel. “Tarot is very
excited to meet you again – the both of you.”
Aleeme smiled.
“I knew it.” He had always known that Tarot wanted to see him too.
“Pansea and
Skye have done their best to prepare Tarot for meeting you, and so did Ulaume,
but the child is nervous and it is hard to predict how he will react to seeing
you. If he shuts down, don’t be discouraged. And if he jumps you, catch him.”
That was all the advice Lisia could offer Aleeme and Azriel.
“You also need
to know that Tarot has adopted another harling as his brother. Skye’s son Lunar
and Tarot are joined at the hip. I am afraid that they are a package deal,”
Ulaume added and rubbed his son’s fingers after sitting down on the couch next
to them. “This morning they snuck out on Skye and Pansea to tell me that they
wouldn’t allow us to separate them.” Aleeme’s face darkened and Ulaume quickly
added, “That’s why I want you to think about moving into this apartment.”
Azriel blinked.
Had he heard correctly? “You want us to live here?”
“Our apartment
is next door,” Pansea said. “The harlings would benefit from this arrangement.”
It was a lot to
take in for Aleeme, but then he smiled at Pansea. The other har had guessed
correctly that he wanted Tarot to live with them. “Azriel and I like that
idea,” he said after Azriel squeezed his hand.
“I will go get
Tarot ready.” Pansea walked over to the doorway and then stopped before turning
around. “Do you mind if I bring Lunar as well? I will make sure he stays in the
back.”
“Bring Lunar
with you,” Azriel replied. If Tarot really cared that much about the other
harling it wouldn’t be fair to cut Lunar out.
~~~
Tarot tugged at
Lunar’s hand and tried to make the other harling walk faster. Lunar, knowing how important this meeting was for Tarot, hurried
up. /Don’t go too fast!/ Tarot immediately
stopped pulling and looked at him guiltily. /It’s okay, just don’t pull at my
arm./
“I'm sorry,”
Tarot murmured and stared at the floor. “But my hostling is waiting for me in
that room.”
Lunar pulled
Tarot close and hugged the other harling. /I know that, but he will still be
there even if we get there a minute later./
Skye smiled at
them. Seeing them interact like that warmed his heart. For a long time, he had
been afraid that Lunar would remain an outcast and wouldn’t make friends, but
since Lunar had Tarot, Skye knew his son had a friend he could count on for the
rest of his life. “Come on now. We shouldn’t keep your hostling waiting.”
Tarot raced
forward once more and this time Lunar ran after him. Skye laughed and opened
the door before Tarot could crash into it.
The moment the
door opened, Tarot stumbled inside. His eyes dashed wildly around as he
searched for his hostling. He found Aleeme seated on the couch with Azriel
sitting next to him. Tarot didn’t know the other two dark-haired hara and
ignored them for the moment. “You are really here!” He was so excited that he
actually let go of Lunar’s hand and ran toward Aleeme. His hostling looked much
better than he had in his memory and Tarot flung himself at the har. Since he
was still too small to hug Aleeme properly, he hugged his hostling’s knees
instead and started to cry softly. This was too much. He had wanted for this to
happen for so long!
Aleeme’s heart
had stopped beating for a few precious seconds when he had laid eyes on his son
again. “Tarot!” He lifted the harling onto his lap and
crushed his son to him. “Please don’t cry. There is no reason to cry.” He
rocked Tarot slowly and watched how the dark hair tried to wrap itself around
his arms, wrists, and fingers. Tarot wasn’t going to let go of him anytime
soon.
Azriel
swallowed hard. He sensed Tarot’s joy at being reunited with his hostling and
watched the two of them weep softly. Curling an arm around his chesnari, he
pulled them both close. He recalled the times that the child had tried to
distract Ponclast from targeting Aleeme or Azriel.
Flick slid his
hand into Ulaume’s and leaned against his chesnari. Although he was smiling,
tears flowed down his face, but they were tears of happiness at seeing Aleeme
and Tarot united again. He had never thought that seeing them together would
have such an impact on him.
Cobweb remained
at a distance close to Lisia. After all the mistakes he had made, he didn’t
feel he had the right to be there. But Aleeme and Azriel had made it very clear
that this was a way to make amends and Cobweb had welcomed that possibility.
Skye stood next
to Pansea and sat on his heels when Lunar tugged at his skirt in a request to
be lifted and settled in his arms. Although Lunar was a bit too old to be
carried about, Skye still indulged his son and certainly at this awkward
moment.
“I thought I
would never see you again!” Tarot lifted his head and looked at Aleeme. His tiny
fingers wiped at his hostling’s tears and then buried themselves in Aleeme’s
dark hair. “I was afraid you had died! Or that you didn’t want to see me
again!”
“Oh, Tarot, I
am sorry that I deserted you when you needed me the most, but I was in no shape
to care for you.” Aleeme continued to rock his son in his arms. “I was afraid
too. I was afraid you had forgotten about me or resented me for…”
Tarot didn’t
allow Aleeme to finish his sentence. “I love you,” he stated softly and with
eyes still swimming with tears. “I always will. You are my hostling.”
Cobweb lowered
his gaze and wished the floor would open and swallow him as he realized how
wrong his decisions had been in the past.
“Do you
remember me too?” Azriel smiled through his tears at Tarot.
A proud
expression appeared on Tarot’s face and the harling seemed to grow several
inches. “Of course I do! You’re Az!
You are my hostling’s Az!”
Smiling at the
harling, Azriel stroked Tarot’s cheek. He tipped his head and studied the
child. He was grateful that none of Ponclast’s features showed on Tarot’s face
and then the restlessly moving hair registered with Azriel. “You are Aleeme’s
harling indeed.”
Tarot giggled
and then freed a hand so he could point at Ulaume. “He said that I inherited it
from him. Is he your father, Aleeme?”
Aleeme nodded.
“Yes, he is.” He quickly exchanged a look with Ulaume and saw that his father
was also quickly wiping away his tears. “Why are we crying when this is a
joyous occasion? I have my harling back!”
Tarot cried out
in pleasure and buried his face against Aleeme’s chest. He couldn’t believe
that his hostling and Azriel looked so much better. “I am glad you are here!”
Aleeme was rubbing his back and Tarot sighed deeply. “I wanted this for so
long.”
Azriel sought
out Aleeme’s gaze and the two hara smiled at each other. Reconciling with Tarot
had gone better than they had dared hope.
Suddenly Tarot
moved and pushed away from Aleeme. “Lunar! You must say hello to him too!”
Aleeme
chuckled. So Pansea, Lisia, and Ulaume had been right. Tarot and Lunar were
inseparable. “Where is he then?”
Tarot turned
around and raised an arm. “Lunar, come over here!”
Skye placed
Lunar back onto the floor again and walked him over to the couch. “Say hello to
Aleeme and Azriel,” he instructed and smiled at his son.
Lunar, feeling bashful, grew flustered and averted his gaze. “Hello.” He
was shy by nature and didn’t do well when meeting new hara, even if one of them
was Tarot’s hostling.
“Hello Lunar,”
Aleeme replied and patted the harling’s fair hair. “It’s nice to meet you. I
have been told that Tarot and you are best friends.”
“Yes, we are!”
Tarot nodded fiercely. “He belongs with me!” Reaching out to Lunar, Tarot
managed to take hold of the harling’s hand and rubbed the fingers.
Aleeme locked
gazes with Pansea and realized that it had been a good thing they had talked
earlier. At least now they knew of a solution to make sure the two harlings
could stay together. “Tarot, would you like it if Az and I moved into this apartment and became Pansea
and Skye’s neighbors? That way Lunar and you can spend as much time together as
you want to.”
Tarot liked
that idea a lot. The harling had done some thinking as well and that had also
been the reason why he had sought Ulaume out that morning. He had been afraid
that Lunar and he would be separated. Although he wanted nothing more than to
live with Aleeme and Azriel, he couldn’t bear the thought of having to leave
Lunar. “Good idea!”
“Since you
approve and the matter has been settled, I believe it is time for you to be
hugged again!” Aleeme announced and hugged Tarot close again. His tears had
dried, but the scars in his heart were still there. Only time and Tarot’s love
could heal those.
~~~
“I will come to
you in the morning,” Tarot said as the two harlings said goodbye for the night.
/You can always talk to me here,/ he added in mind
touch and touched Lunar’s temple. /I love you…/
/I don’t want
to go to sleep without you./ Lunar pouted, but he
still knew that they had to go separate ways that night. Aleeme and Azriel
wanted to be alone with Tarot and Lunar had to go home with Pansea and Skye. /I
want you to be there when the sun rises./
“I will be
there.” Tarot waved goodbye to Lunar and then turned around. It was the first
time in several months that he was going to sleep without having Lunar close.
Aleeme had
stretched out on the bed and Azriel was busying himself with pushing down the
covers. Flick and Ulaume had left taking Lisia and Cobweb with them so the
three of them could be alone. “I like Flick too,” Tarot whispered as he climbed
onto the bed. “I like your family.”
“They are your
family too.” Aleeme opened his arms and caught Tarot in them. Azriel curled up
around them and the two hara exchanged several glances. Tarot snuggled up to
Aleeme and his head rested against his hostling’s chest. “Tarot… How much do
you remember of what happened in that room?” Tarot raised his gaze and Aleeme
read the answer to his question in his son’s green eyes. Only now did he
register that Tarot’s eyes were the same color as his. “You remember
everything.”
“I tried to
keep you safe, but he never listened.” Ponclast had always easily shoved or
kicked him out of the way. “I am sorry I was too little to protect you,” Tarot
whispered and swallowed hard. Tears started to build in his eyes again.
“No,” Azriel
responded. “Aleeme and I should have found a way to keep you safe, but we were
weakened and couldn’t protect you.”
“Please don’t
feel guilty for what Ponclast did to me,” Aleeme said, surprising himself that
he could actually speak the vile name. “You did your best and that is all that
counts.”
Tears still
leaked from his eyes, but Tarot didn’t feel that upset anymore. Mostly he felt
sad. “I am sorry he hurt you like that. Both of you,” he murmured and looked at
Azriel from over his shoulder. “I am glad you are better now.”
“And I am glad
we found you again.” Aleeme hugged his harling tightly and was embraced by
Azriel in turn. The two hara smiled at each other, happy to be reunited.
~~~
Tarot didn’t
sleep that night. He couldn’t stop looking at Aleeme, still finding it hard to
believe that his hostling had come for him. Turning in the embrace until he was
on his back, he smiled at Azriel and noticed, to his surprise, that the har was
awake as well. “Are you going to be my father?” he asked. He wanted a hostling
*and* a father.
“I would be
honored if you would have me.” Azriel’s fingers moved through Tarot’s lively
hair and grinned when one strand wrapped itself around his thumb. “We will be a
little family.”
“Can Lunar be
part of that family too?” Tarot would never forget about Lunar.
“Maybe later
once the two of you are grown up.” Azriel wouldn’t be surprised to see Tarot
and Lunar becoming chesna once they were adults. “You love him a lot, don’t
you?”
Tarot nodded. “Almost as much as I love Aleeme.”
~~~
The next
morning, Tarot tried to leave the bed, but Aleeme woke up and looked at him in
curiosity. “I promised to go to Lunar at sunrise. Can I?”
Aleeme didn’t
want to let his harling out of his sight, but nodded at any rate. He couldn’t
expect Tarot and Lunar to change their lives just because he had showed up. He
wanted the harling’s life to remain as ‘normal’ as possible. “Do you need me to
walk you there?”
Tarot started
to shake his head since he could find his way on his own, but then he nodded
because he wanted Aleeme’s company a moment longer. “Yes, take me there.”
In the end, it
was Tarot who guided Aleeme to the door and knocked on it. Tarot wasn’t
surprised to find Lunar opening the door since the harling was intelligent and
had found a way to push down the door handle even though he was a bit too small
to do so. Tarot slipped inside and hugged the other harling. “I always keep my
promises.”
Lunar hugged
Tarot back and then looked at Aleeme. “Are you coming inside too?”
Aleeme had
caught sight of Skye standing at the back of the room watching them. Skye
winked at him and Aleeme realized that the two harlings were being watched
over. “I will go back to Azriel. Ask Skye to bring you to our rooms when you
are done visiting Lunar.”
“I don’t need
Skye to take me! I can walk the distance myself! I am almost two years old!”
Tarot raised a hand and showed Aleeme two fingers.
Aleeme caressed
his son’s face with a loving look. “Yes, you are a very smart and brave
harling.” He kissed the crown of Tarot’s head and then made his way back to his
apartment so he could snuggle up to Azriel again. A new chapter in his life had
begun.
TBC
Part
9
During the next
few weeks, Aleeme and Azriel made themselves at home in the Harling Gardens.
Ulaume had fetched some of his son’s personal belongings while Cobweb had
returned to Forever to collect items that Azriel wanted to have with him. Tarot
brought flowers home and small animals which he found outside. Some of them had
been injured and Azriel helped the harling nurse them back to health.
Tarot visited
with Lunar every day. They spent most of the day together and parted during the
evening to go to their respective hostlings. However, it still happened that
one of them snuck over to the other’s apartment where the other harling let him
in. Skye as well as Aleeme had found the harlings snuggled up to each other
repeatedly.
Swift and Seel
also visited. Their visit was awkward since they didn’t know how to relate to
Tarot, but they did their best to befriend the harling for Azriel’s sake.
However Tarot sensed that they weren’t really glad to see him and distanced himself from them and was glad when they returned to
Forever.
Two months
later, Aleeme, Azriel, and Tarot had become a family. Ulaume had stayed while
Flick visited every week. Even Cobweb came to visit regularly. But Tarot’s
world mostly revolved around Aleeme, Azriel, and Lunar. He loved them best.
~~~
“I’m two now.
I’m old!” Tarot chuckled and smiled at Aleeme. His hostling had even gotten him
a present. “What’s in it?” The carefully wrapped box heightened his curiosity
and he wanted to rip away the paper right away, but he wanted Azriel to be
there as well.
“You are still
very young,” Aleeme replied and stroked his son’s hair. Tarot had set the
healing process into motion and the emotional scars which his imprisonment had
left behind on his soul were fading. “But also very wise for your age. What are
you waiting for? Open it.”
Tarot
immediately ripped the paper apart and opened the box. Inside was a stunning
outfit made of soft fabric in bright red and yellow colors. “I love it!” he
exclaimed and removed the shirt and pants from the box. Keeping it in front of
him, he showed the garments off. “Can I show Lunar?”
Aleeme nodded.
“Go show him then.”
Tarot was out
of the room in seconds and banged on the door to Skye’s apartment. “Lunar! I
need to show you something!” Pansea opened the door and let the harling inside.
Tarot almost tripped over the shirt, but managed to gain his footing again.
“Look Lunar!”
Lunar smiled at
Tarot. “Nice…” he commented and fingered the fabric. His birthday was in two
weeks and he hoped he would get a present too. “I have something for you too,
Tarot.” Suddenly, he looked disappointed. “It is not as pretty as the clothes
though.”
Tarot placed
the clothes on the bed and then walked over to Lunar. “What did you get me?”
Lunar was
seated on the floor and raised a hand, handing Tarot something wrapped in
bright green fabric. “It’s not much…” He lowered his gaze and stared at the
floor.
Reverently,
Tarot unwrapped his present and then smiled warmly at Lunar. “I love it!” It
was a stone that Lunar had polished until its exterior was smooth and flawless.
There was a hole in the middle so he could wear it on a leather thong as
jewelry.
Lunar peeked at
Tarot and said, “Pansea had to make the hole. I tried, but…” He showed Tarot
his bandaged ring finger. “I’m not strong enough.”
Tarot’s smile
faded. “You’re injured!”
“It’ll be gone
tomorrow. At least, that’s what Colden says.” Pansea had taken him to see the
healer. “I wanted to make something for you.” He’d had no other means to get
Tarot a present.
“The stone is
much prettier than the clothes,” Tarot stated and meaning every word of it.
Lunar had been hurt in order to create a nice present for him. Tarot hugged
Lunar close and grinned. Lunar’s birthday was coming up soon and Tarot was
already thinking up a present for Lunar in turn.
~~~
“You look
lovely,” Aleeme declared as he fussed over his son. Dressed in his new outfit
and wearing Lunar’s polished stone on a leather thong, the harling looked
absolutely adorable. They were getting ready to head over to Skye’s apartment
to celebrate Lunar’s third birthday. Although Lunar was smaller than Tarot, the
harling was a year older.
“Can we go
now?” Tarot was growing impatient. He wanted to give Lunar his present. He had
worked hard on making it although Aleeme had had to help him.
“Let’s go,”
Azriel suggested and took Tarot’s hand in his. As they made their way over to
Skye’s apartment, Azriel pondered the direction his life had taken. Living in
the
Ulaume appeared
in the corridor with Flick at his side. His chesnari was visiting and had
wanted to join the celebrations. In a few days, Flick would head home to care
for Orien, their second son, whom they had neglected lately.
“Flick!” Delighted to see the other har, Tarot
launched himself at Flick and was caught in strong arms. Flick whirled him
about and Tarot laughed loudly. “Put me down!” His clothes were getting all
wrinkled and he wanted to look pretty for Lunar!
Flick put Tarot
down again and helped the harling smooth the fabric. “You look just fine.”
Tarot smiled
gratefully and then walked over to the door to Skye’s apartment. “Lunar! Open
the door!”
It was Pansea
who opened the door and stepped aside to let them in. Pansea and Skye had
become good friends with Azriel and Aleeme in the last few months and they were
grateful that the other couple had accepted the offer to stay in the
“Lunar!” Tarot
ran toward the other harling and collided hard with Lunar. The two of them
toppled over, but landed safely on the rug. “I made you a present too!”
Aleeme and
Azriel had wanted to congratulate Lunar as well, but realized that they had to
wait their turn so they talked to Pansea and Skye instead. Ulaume and Flick
watched the harlings and smiled.
Lunar blinked
and watched Tarot with big eyes when the other harling brought out something
wrapped up in blue fabric. “Is that for me?” Tarot placed it on his lap and
Lunar carefully removed the fabric. Hidden inside the folds of the fabric was a
wooden frame holding a neatly written message behind a wall of glass. They had started their lessons two months ago and
Tarot had worked hard to write it
“I always
will,” Tarot stated and gave the other harling a wink. “I will never remove
it.”
~~~
One night
Aleeme and Azriel had the bed to themselves because Tarot had gotten his way
and was sleeping over at Lunar’s. For the last six months, they had shared
their bed with Tarot, but once they were resting that close together, a deep
sense of intimacy manifested between them.
“Az? Do you want to share breath?” Aleeme was naked under
the covers and moved closer to Azriel. They had taken several small steps over
the last few months and had rebuilt the old familiarity where their bodies were
concerned.
“Always,”
Azriel mumbled and pressed his lips onto Aleeme’s. Aleeme tasted the way he
always had, but the kiss differed. Aleeme closed his eyes and Azriel took great
care to keep any nasty memories out of their breath. He involuntarily sucked in
his breath as Aleeme’s fingers glided down his spine. Breaking off, he slid his
fingers into Aleeme’s hair and searched the green eyes. “Are you ready to take
this step?”
“Are you?”
Aleeme’s fingers moved in-between his chesnari’s legs and touched Azriel’s
soume-lam gently. Brushing his fingertips against the sensitive area, he
watched Azriel close his eyes in bliss.
Azriel
whimpered softly. “I’m more than ready…” He rolled Aleeme onto his back and
raised himself until his soume-lam was positioned above his chesnari’s
ouana-lim. It was quite a change from the way they had taken aruna in the past
since Aleeme had been soume and Azriel ouana, but he understood why things were
different now. It was easier for Aleeme to be ouana at the moment and Azriel
was happy to get whatever intimacy he could from his chesnari.
Burying his
face against Aleeme’s chest, Azriel twined their fingers and then lowered
himself onto the stem. With a low groan coming from the back of his throat, he
took in the ouana-lim and moaned when the petals brushed against the walls of
his soume-lam, activating one sikra after the other.
Once they were fully joined, he blanketed Aleeme’s upper body with his own and
rolled his chesnari on top of him.
Aleeme
stretched, threw back his head, and thrust. In a way, taking aruna with Azriel
was new since they had never taken it this way. Their fingers were still twined
and Aleeme squeezed hard, showing Azriel how much he wanted his love. Leaning
in closer, he claimed his chesnari’s lips and shared breath with Azriel once
more.
They lasted
surprisingly long. Sharing a mutual climax, they clung to each other. Aleeme
collapsed on top of his chesnari and wept silently. Azriel knew why his
chesnari was crying and didn’t speak. The fact that they had been able to take
aruna again had overwhelmed him too. “We have taken back control,” Azriel
whispered and ran his thumb along the curve of Aleeme’s ear. “Our life is our
own once more.” Ponclast no longer had a hold on them. They had finally
defeated him.
~~~
Tarot looked at
the ceiling and started to count the stars. He didn’t know where Skye had found
the luminous plastic in the form of a moon and stars which lit up Lunar’s
bedroom, but he was glad he had. Even though there were walls between him and
Aleeme and Azriel, he still sensed their joy at having been intimate again.
Lunar, whose head was resting on his chest, lifted his gaze and looked at him.
/They are happy./ Lunar had seen Tarot’s horrid past in the other harling’s
mind shortly after Tarot had rescued him. The two harlings had no secrets with
each other and Lunar knew exactly what Ponclast had done to him. /And I am
happy for you too. You have a hostling and a father now and the best thing is
that we can stay together./
Tarot nodded
and closed his eyes while humming a lullaby which Ulaume would sing whenever
the har was watching him. Lunar slipped into sleep first, but Tarot followed
quickly.
~~~
The next four
years passed by in peace and quiet. Tarot and Lunar continued to grow up while
Aleeme and Azriel found their place at the
Ulaume and
Flick continued to visit frequently and even Swift, Seel, and Cobweb joined
them at times. One time even
So, four years
later, another celebration was upon them. Tarot was going to turn six and Lunar
seven. They were no longer harlings exactly, but hadn’t entered feybraiha
either. They were at that awkward stage when they didn’t belong to either
group.
Lunar was
watching himself for the first signs of feybraiha since he was the oldest. Skye
expected the changes to appear shortly and Lunar was excited about it. A few
weeks ago he had taken special classes with Lisia and the hostling had
explained to him what exactly happened at feybraiha, so Lunar was eager for the
transformation to begin. He only worried that he might leave Tarot behind. Ever
since Lisia had brought up his upcoming feybraiha he had been thinking about
the har to take aruna with that first time. Had it been up to him, he would
have chosen Tarot, but he needed an experienced har to make the transformation
work. In the end, he had chosen Onyx, who was two years older. It helped that
he knew the har from childhood.
Leaning in
closer, Lunar watched from over Tarot’s shoulder as the other harling tended to
one of the vegetable gardens. Tarot was good at making things grow and had
saved many plants the last few years. He also had a touch of a healer about him
as he tended to injured animals and nursed them back to health again. “What are
you doing?”
“I am trying to
save this year’s potatoes. Some insect is nagging away at the stems.” Tarot
tipped back his head and gazed into Lunar’s midnight-blue eyes that had
darkened over the years from the pale blue. “I want to save this year’s
harvest.” Studying Lunar’s face, he wondered what was different. “Hey, you feel
hot.” A feverish sheen covered Lunar’s normally pale face.
“I don’t feel
that great,” Lunar admitted. “I itch all over.”
“I can’t
believe you didn’t realize it before. Lunar, you have started feybraiha!” Tarot
was happy for his best friend. “This is exciting!”
“For you
maybe,” Lunar retorted and scratched his arm. “To me, it’s just discomfort.”
“Pansea and
Skye will come for you shortly and will prepare you for aruna for the first
time. Do you still want it to be Onyx that first time?”
“I’d rather
have you,” Lunar replied, crestfallen. “But that’s not possible. I’ll wait for
you though. When you’re ready you can chose me if you want to. I will have some
experience at that point.”
“Thank you.
I’ll remember your offer when the time comes.” Abandoning his plants for the
time being, Tarot took Lunar’s hand in his and got to his feet. “Let’s see your
hostling. They need to know what is happening.”
“Tarot? We might not see each other for some
time once they know.” Lunar came to a halt and took Tarot’s hands in his. “I
want you to know that I only want you, even though I have to take aruna with
Onyx. I will wait for you.”
Tarot rested
his brow against Lunar’s and smiled. “I feel the same way. I want you and nohar
else.” If Lunar was determined to wait for him, so would he. He wanted them to
become chesna just like Pansea and Skye and Aleeme and Azriel. He wanted Lunar
to himself.
~~~
Tarot didn’t
see Lunar for the next three weeks and they were the longest ever. Every day he
hoped Lunar would seek him out, but Skye assured him that Lunar was merely
going through the necessary rituals and hadn’t forgotten about him, which was
Tarot’s greatest fear. What if Lunar decided that taking aruna with Onyx was
better than keeping his promise to Tarot?
Then one day
when he least expected it, long arms curled themselves around his waist and
pulled him against a warm body. Turning his head, he was about to tell the
other har off, but found himself looking at Lunar’s handsome face. His friend
had changed. Some of the light that had always been hidden inside of Lunar’s
core had found its way outside. “I thought you had forgotten about me!”
Lunar laughed
and shook his head. “I will never forget you!” But things had changed for him.
He was an adult now. He had gone through his rites of passage and was no longer
a harling. Aruna with Onyx had felt good, but he knew that aruna with Tarot
would feel even better.
“What was it
like? Is it like Lisia says it is?”
“It is even
better – taking aruna that is.” Lunar ruffled Tarot’s hair and the strands
playfully wrapped themselves around Lunar’s wrist. “It won’t be long until you
find out.” Hopefully Tarot would reach his feybraiha within the year.
~~~
“Aleeme? When will feybraiha start for me?”
Tarot sat next to his hostling on the couch and looked at him pleadingly. “It
has been a year since Lunar went though his feybraiha and I still am not
showing any signs.”
“It occurs
between five and eight years of age roughly. It is impossible to predict when
you are ready. You have to be patient.” Aleeme couldn’t believe how quickly the
last few years had passed by. Although Tarot was worried that feybraiha wasn’t
happening for him yet, Aleeme knew it wouldn’t take much longer for his son to
start showing the first signs. “You are growing up so quickly. You are six
years now… Feybraiha will start shortly for you and then you will be an adult.
You were so adorable as a harling.”
“I am still
adorable,” Tarot retorted jokingly. “At least, Lunar thinks so.”
“Are you afraid
that Lunar will find a chesnari before you have started feybraiha? Is that it?”
Aleeme had gotten to know his son pretty well over the years.
“Am I that
transparent?” Tarot grew flustered. “The thing is…everything is different. In
the past, Lunar followed me about. He was the smaller one… We were inseparable
and now…”
“You know that
hara need to take aruna at a regular base. That has nothing to do with the
feelings Lunar has for you.” Azriel and he also took aruna frequently and
lately Aleeme had even been able to be soume for his chesnari, which was
another major step in their relationship. “Lunar loves you. Don’t doubt his
feelings for you.”
“It is hard for
me at the moment,” Tarot admitted. “Lunar has changed, but in a good way,” he
added quickly. “His self-confidence has grown and he has become more
independent. I like that.”
“Just give it
time,” Aleeme advised. “It won’t be long until you start feybraiha as well.”
~~~
Lisia was
overseeing the oldest harlings’ lessons that day and Tarot was one of his
students. As he circled the harling, Lisia noticed the way Tarot kept
absentmindedly scratching his arm. Another probing look revealed that Tarot’s
face was flushed and Lisia smiled contentedly. He knew that Tarot was eagerly
awaiting his feybraiha to start and hearing that he was finally showing the
symptoms would probably delight him. Lisia pulled up a chair and sat down next
to Tarot. “Does it tingle?” he asked, wondering how long it would take the
harling to figure out why his skin was itching.
Tarot was
concentrating on his writing and only shrugged his shoulders. “I can manage.”
A few of the
other harlings had caught on and were giggling as Lisia winked at them. “Do you
know why it itches?
Getting annoyed
with Lisia’s questions because he wanted to finish his task, Tarot looked up
and stared right into Lisia’s smiling eyes. His jaw dropped and suddenly he
understood why Lisia had been asking him those questions. “Has it started?” His
eyes widened and he enthusiastically grabbed hold of Lisia’s right hand.
Lisia quickly
nodded his head. “Your feybraiha has started. I am happy for you.”
Tarot’s eyes
attained a dreamy look. He didn’t care too much about the fact that he would be
considered an adult in a few days. The only thing he could think of was that he
could take aruna with Lunar and in that way reclaim his best friend’s
attention.
~~~
Tarot had
wanted to talk to Lunar first, but Lisia had escorted him home where the
hostling and Aleeme had told Tarot everything he needed to know about the
upcoming rites. Tarot hadn’t really listened because all he could think of was
telling Lunar. After what seemed to be endless hours, Aleeme finally allowed
him to seek out Lunar.
Finally
sighting the blond har in the gardens, Tarot ran toward him. Unable to come to
a stop in time, he crashed into Lunar and the two of them tumbled onto the
ground. Luckily the grass and moss cushioned their fall.
Lunar had
wanted to scold the har for running him down, but when he saw that it was Tarot
who had crashed into him he remained quiet and searched the handsome face
instead. Having gone through feybraiha recently himself he instantly recognized
the symptoms. “It has started for you too!”
“Yes! We’ll be
able to take aruna shortly! Oh, Lunar, I’m so excited!” Tarot ended up
straddling Lunar’s waist and buried his fingers in the blond hair. Leaning in
closer, he brushed his lips against Lunar’s. “I want you.”
Lunar raised a
hand and caressed Tarot’s face as he smiled at his chesnari and future rooning partner. “I will be ouana and you will be soume and
we will truly be one when we take aruna. I always knew that I belonged with
you.” He had known it from the first moment they had met and now, finally, they
could make their bond final.
~~~
Tarot was
nervous in spite of all the advice he had gotten recently. Lisia, Pansea,
Lunar, and even Aleeme and Azriel had tried to explain to him what to expect
from the first time he took aruna. But as he sat on the bed, naked, trembling,
and waiting for Lunar to join him, he wondered if he would ever feel prepared.
He was worried
that he might disappoint Lunar, who was the experienced one of them. Their
changed roles left him feeling a bit awkward. In the past, Lunar had followed
him about and had taken his cue from him, but now the fair-haired har was the
one in control and Tarot didn’t know how to deal with that. He had always
thought that he’d have to take care of Lunar and protect him and now Lunar was
the one having to guide him.
“You don’t have
to be nervous,” Lunar whispered and entered the room. He had bathed, rubbed
scented oil onto his skin, and had brushed his hair until it shone like the
sun. Naked and with his skin glowing from the oil, he advanced on the bed and
sat down next to Tarot. “You are beautiful,” he murmured and let his fingers
glide down Tarot’s chest. “You are a harling no more, Tarot.” He loved seeing
the dark hair curl and uncurl as they reached for
strands of his fair hair before releasing it. “Do you trust me?”
“Always,” Tarot
replied and moved closer. Since Lunar was close his nervousness was fading. “I
want to touch you.”
Lunar smiled.
“Why don’t you let me touch you instead? I’m here to teach you, remember?” Lunar
placed his palms against Tarot’s chest and gently pushed the other har onto his
back. He straddled Tarot’s waist and bent down to finally claim the other har’s
lips properly. “Let me show you what sharing breath is like.”
Tarot’s toes
curled when Lunar released small puffs of affection into his mind. He clasped
his hands behind Lunar’s neck and made sure Lunar couldn’t stop. Feeling
Lunar’s naked body against his sparked his lust and he thrust wantonly against
the other har’s pelvis.
Lunar had to stop
sharing breath when they ran out of air. Gazing into Tarot’s eyes, his
fingertips traced the outline of the other har’s eyebrows before his right hand
traveled lower and between Tarot’s legs. “You are soume already.” His fingers
touched the moist center and probed inside.
Tarot closed
his eyes and threw back his head. A moan escaped his lips as he parted his legs
further. “Don’t play with me.”
Lunar nodded.
He remembered how eager he had been the first time and took pity on the other
har. “Let me guide you… You can be ouana later.”
“I don’t mind
being soume or ouana. I just want to know you.” Tarot’s right hand squeezed
Lunar’s buttock while his left reached for the other har’s ouana-lim.
Lunar caught
Tarot’s hand before the dark-haired har could touch the petals. “You might push
me over the edge.”
Tarot twined
his fingers with Lunar’s and looked pleadingly at the blond har. “Lunar… I need
this…”
Lunar shifted
on top of Tarot and positioned himself so his ouana-lim could enter Tarot’s
soume-lam. He took his time guiding himself inside and claimed Tarot’s lips
again. While sharing breath, he slid into place and the petals of his ouana-lim
rubbed against the folds of Tarot’s soume-lam, bringing them both pleasure. “We
are united, Tarot. We are one.”
Tarot nodded.
“I always wanted this…” Running his fingers along Lunar’s face, he focused on
the sensations washing over him. The pleasure was unimaginable and just when he
thought he couldn’t feel more bliss, Lunar started to move. Tarot arched his
back and cried out in ecstasy.
Wanting to make
Tarot feel as good as he could, Lunar concentrated on bringing them to a joined
high. Although he knew what to expect when they hit the top, the intensity of
the pleasure coursing through him still overwhelmed him. Lunar had been right
when he had thought that aruna with the right har would double the pleasure.
Burying his face in Tarot’s hair, Lunar let go.
Tarot’s body
was an endless ocean and he was floating on waves that threw him from one
direction into another. He had never felt anything like it before and was
afraid he might faint. Strands of his hair curled around Lunar’s wrists and
waist and, when Lunar collapsed on top of him, they didn’t release the blond
har. The hold the hair had on Lunar tightened instead.
Panting hard,
Lunar managed to raise his head so he could gaze at his chesnari. They might
have taken aruna only once, but they both knew they would be chesna for the
rest of their lives. They had always known that.
“I love you,”
Tarot whispered and rubbed Lunar’s cheek with his thumb. An affectionate sated
light had appeared in his green eyes and he couldn’t stop staring at the blond
har.
“I love you
too. I always did and I always will. You are my chesnari, Tarot, and I am
yours.”
Tarot folded an
arm around Lunar and pulled him close. Lunar blanketed Tarot’s body and wrapped
his arms around the dark-haired har. In a few hours they would take aruna again
and then Tarot would be ouana. Lunar smiled lazily, trying to imagine what his
life would be like now that they were chesna. “I will lead a happy life,” Lunar
remarked and his lips brushed Tarot’s skin. “We will be happy.”
Tarot smiled.
“We already are.”
The end