Title: Itsy, Bitsy Spider
Author: Morgana
Author’s Email: morganalebeau@yahoo.com
Web page: http://www.paranoid.nl/avalon
Pairings: Elrond/Celebrían mentioned, Erestor/Glorfindel
Rating: PG 13
Summary; Glorfindel learns why Erestor is afraid of spiders.
Disclaimer: Not mine. These characters belong to Professor Tolkien. No copyright infringement is intended. I'm not making any money out of these stories!
Warning: AU of course.
Beta read by Patricia and DA, thanks!
All remaining mistakes are mine.
Itsy, Bitsy Spider
Glorfindel sat opposite Erestor’s desk in the Advisor’s study. He joined Erestor there most mornings to work on the duty rosters and to discuss incidents near their borders if any had happened. That day was no exception and they were working on the rotation schedules. Glorfindel always took the easy way out and let Erestor do most of the planning, which also gave him more time to study the dark-haired Elf.
Erestor and he had been friends for some years. Well, sort of friends. They behaved during working hours and when Elrond was close, but some times, either one would snap at the other for no apparent reason. They always apologized later, but there was often a tension between them.
A tension which only Erestor had learned to read and label. He liked Glorfindel too much – more than Glorfindel liked him – and he knew that his courtship – if he would try any – was doomed to fail. So he tried to keep his distance, but sometimes, Glorfindel would make a remark that would annoy him, which then resulted in him needing to put some distance between. That, thankfully, hadn’t happened yet that day and the mood between them was relaxed.
Erestor handed Glorfindel the rosters and said, “Done.” Putting the rotation schedules together had been hard work and he leaned back in his chair and massaged his brow. “That should work.”
Glorfindel studied the rosters and nodded his head. “I will not be leading many patrols during the next month.”
“Do you mind?” Erestor would hate having to change the rosters again.
“Nay, actually I do not. It is nice to have some time off.” For it meant he could spend his time with Elrond and the Elflings. The twins were toddlers now and regularly got themselves into trouble. Elrond and Celebrían always welcomed a pair of helpful hands these days.
Relieved, Erestor released the breath he had been holding and moved forward on the chair. His desk was piled with paperwork and since the rosters were taken care of, he had to concentrate on his correspondence.
But then Erestor froze.
Glorfindel had been in the process of standing when he noticed that Erestor had seemingly stopped breathing. Leaning forward, he studied the dark eyes which were transfixed on something on the desk. Sweat appeared on Erestor’s brow and the Advisor’s elegant hands turned into claws. “Erestor? What is amiss?” He had never seen Erestor give in to his emotions like this before. What had upset the Chief Advisor?
Erestor was unable to answer. He could only stare in terror at the tiny spider that had crawled out from beneath a stack of letters. The horrible creature was moving toward him on its eight, hairy legs.
Glorfindel followed the direction of Erestor’s stare and lifted an eyebrow upon discovering the tiny spider moving over the desk. It really was tiny and Glorfindel snorted in disbelief. “Do not tell me you are afraid of spiders!”
But Erestor was having increasing difficulty breathing and the cold sweat formed a thick layer on his brow. The spider had changed course and was heading toward his right hand. He desperately wanted to pull his hand away, but he couldn’t move. His body no longer obeyed.
Erestor’s reaction amused Glorfindel at first and his initial reaction had been to make fun of the Advisor, but looking at the big, brown eyes, Glorfindel realized that the other Elf’s terror was real. Erestor wasn’t playing him. The Chief Advisor was deathly afraid of that little spider. /Glorfindel to the rescue,/ he thought and used a sheet of paper to catch the spider, which he carefully carried to the window. After opening it, he released the spider, which was happy to continue its way outside.
Glorfindel closed the window again and returned to the desk. Erestor was shaking like a leaf and his hands were opening and closing spasmodically. “What was that all about?” Glorfindel asked as he leaned in closer and placed his hands flat on the desk. He stood close to Erestor and saw the terror in the brown eyes. Erestor was apparently suffering from some sort of shock. “It is gone now. I put it outside.”
Erestor forced himself to react. The spider was gone – the threat -- was gone and he was making a fool of himself. In a moment, Glorfindel would start laughing at him and he would never live down this incident. He had kept his fear hidden for so many years and now Glorfindel had seen him freeze at the sight of that little spider.
“Erestor? It is gone.” Glorfindel placed a hand on Erestor’s shoulder, but the Advisor immediately shook it off. “Are you all right?”
Erestor wanted to scream at the blond Elf that he was *not* all right and that it was clear for everyone to see that he had felt terrified of the tiny critter, but the words didn’t leave his lips. His vocal cords refused to cooperate.
“Erestor? I do not know what happened, but you are safe now.” Growing genuinely worried for Erestor’s well-being, Glorfindel sat on his heels so he could study the dark eyes better. “The spider is gone.”
Erestor stopped shaking and drew in a deep breath. He hated himself for losing control like that in front of Glorfindel. Why had the warrior still been there when the pest had appeared? Now he had lost face!
“I did not know you were afraid of spiders,” Glorfindel said, frowning deeply. He had never noticed anything like that before.
Erestor composed himself and he found his voice again. “I would appreciate it if you did not mention this incident to anyone, especially the twins. I do not want them to adopt my fear.”
Glorfindel nodded. “I will be discreet.”
“Thank you.” Erestor rubbed his face with his hands and then drew in another deep breath. “Thank you for putting it outside.” He wanted Glorfindel out immediately so he could deal with the fear that still lingered in his mind. Seeing that tiny spider had reminded him sharply of what had happened all those years ago.
“You are welcome,” Glorfindel answered as he rose from the floor. “I had better leave now,” he said as he realized that Erestor wanted to be alone.
Erestor nodded thankfully. “Aye, please.”
Glorfindel walked toward the doorway, opened the door, and stepped into the corridor. Erestor’s reaction however continued to worry and puzzle him. What had caused such a fierce reaction?
~~~
“You are not yourself today,” Elrond remarked as they sat in the Elf-Lord’s chambers that evening. Celebrían was playing with the twins on the rug and Elrond and Erestor had settled down near the fireplace. “Did Glorfindel say something that annoyed you?”
Erestor shook his head and stared at his hands resting idly in his lap. That tiny spider had almost succeeded in reaching them. “There was a spider on my desk today,” he said, knowing Elrond would understand why it had upset him. “I did not see it until it was already crawling toward me.” He shivered under the force of the memories. “Thankfully Glorfindel was there and removed it for me. He knows now, Elrond.”
“And did he make fun of you like you thought he would?” Elrond sipped his herbal tea and smiled when he saw Elladan press a sloppy kiss onto Elrohir’s cheek.
“Nay, he did not. That surprised me.” Erestor listened to the chuckling that left Elrohir’s lips at being kissed like that. “He removed the spider and tried to calm me down.”
“I always told you that you had nothing to fear from Glorfindel. He wants to be your friend.” Elrond’s gaze shifted from his family to Erestor and he thought about his dear friend’s problems. “You should tell him.”
Erestor’s eyes opened and he frowned at Elrond. “Tell him what?” Elrond couldn’t possibly know that he had feelings for Glorfindel!
“You should tell him what happened in Mirkwood. I am serious, Erestor.”
Erestor shuddered. “I do not want to experience that day again.” He had locked it out for a reason – to keep his sanity.
“But do you not think Glorfindel should know?” Elrond considered his options. How could he convince Erestor to confide in Glorfindel? “He is probably wondering right now why that tiny spider terrified you.”
Erestor rationally knew that Elrond was right: Glorfindel should know. Glorfindel was Elrond’s Captain and responsible for everyone’s safety. What if he froze like that when they were on the road and under attack and he would endanger the rest of the group just because there was a spider dangling in the trees and weaving its web? He couldn’t take that risk. Elrond was right. He had to tell Glorfindel, but he was not looking forward to baring his soul to the seasoned warrior.
~~~
Glorfindel was surprised to see Erestor step onto the balcony. Behind him, loud noises came from the Hall of Fire, since most of the Elves had gathered there to eat, drink, and listen to the minstrels’ songs. Glorfindel however preferred the peace and quiet of Imladris itself and never grew tired of staring at the moon and stars or admiring the lovely green forests and the Bruinen, its water shining like silver in the moonlight.
“Can I speak with you? Or am I intruding?” Erestor hoped Glorfindel wouldn’t insist on having his privacy restored because he wasn’t certain he would ever find the courage again to approach the warrior about this subject.
Glorfindel turned around so he faced Erestor and smiled encouragingly. Erestor was wringing his hands, giving Glorfindel the impression that the Advisor didn’t even know he was doing so. Erestor was nervous and Glorfindel had seldom seen the other Elf like that. The only time he could remember was when Celebrían had been about to give birth to the twins. “Nay, you are not intruding. We can speak.” Was this about the incident that had happened that morning with the spider?
“I am not usually that easily frightened,” Erestor began, hiding behind his raven hair. He wore it loose on purpose as he used it as a curtain to shield his features from curious looks and Glorfindel was definitely giving him one of those. “But I *am* afraid of spiders – for a reason,” he added belatedly.
“Go on. I am listening.” Glorfindel studied Erestor’s body language and concluded that the other Elf was reluctant to open up to him. He had to tread carefully and the last thing he should do was to make fun of his friend. Aye, although they occasionally didn’t cooperate, he did think of Erestor as a friend...a dear friend even.
“It happened two centuries ago,” Erestor started and quickly hid his hands within his long sleeves. He tended to fumble with fabric whenever he was nervous and he didn’t want to appear weak or vulnerable in front of Glorfindel. It was bad enough he had to tell him! “Elrond sent me on a mission to Mirkwood. I was to talk to Thranduil and see if we could establish a truce.”
Glorfindel nodded and took a step closer to Erestor. The dark-haired Elf was shaking himself to pieces, but didn’t seem to notice he was trembling. Glorfindel wanted to reach out again and place a hand on Erestor’s shoulder, but remembered that Erestor had shunned his touch that morning and so decided he wasn’t going to make a fool of himself by trying again.
Erestor drew in a deep breath, placed his hands on the balustrade, and clawed at the stone. “We were attacked before we reached Thranduil. A group of ten spiders ambushed us and I had to watch as one guard after another was stabbed, poisoned, and eventually eaten. I fought for my life that day and…” His voice failed him and he closed his eyes in an attempt to compose himself, but that was a mistake as the memories attacked him once more.
Glorfindel jumped off the balustrade and, throwing caution to the wind, wrapped his arms around Erestor’s waist. He didn’t speak, he merely pulled Erestor close and held him tight.
Erestor was so lost in his memories that he didn’t register the embrace. He only knew that he had somehow found the strength to finish his story. “Only two of us escaped that day...one of the archers and me. We fled into the forest, though we were both wounded. The spiders had done some serious damage and my companion had been poisoned. I tried to suck the poison from the wound, but it had already spread through his body and he died the next day. I was all alone, injured, tired, and traumatized. I roamed the forest for days before Thranduil’s sentries found me. They took me home and Thranduil himself cared for me and nursed me back to health. Recovery took me a year and it was two years before I felt brave enough to travel back to Imladris. I was too afraid to cross the forest that housed those monsters.”
Glorfindel tightened his hold on Erestor and felt grateful when the other Elf’s trembling began to lessen. Erestor bowed his head and hunched his shoulders. He looked defeated.
“Maybe now you understand why I am afraid of spiders – even tiny ones. They remind me of the horrors I saw that day in Mirkwood Forest.” Erestor swallowed convulsively and tears escaped his eyes. “I will never forget how one of those monsters attacked the Captain of my escort, speared him with one of its hairy legs, and then lifted him. Blood sprang from his chest and his mouth and he suffered convulsions which seemed to last for minutes, but I know it was only seconds…” That image haunted him still and caused him to have nightmares some nights.
“But you are safe now.” Glorfindel could have said so many other things, like: ‘If I had been Captain, none of that would have happened’, or ‘I would have kept you safe’, but saying those things seemed irrelevant. Erestor had lived those horrors and had been injured in mind and body.
“I do not want you to think I am mad,” Erestor said, blinking his watering eyes. “I noticed the way you looked at me this morning – like I had lost my mind. After all, it was only a tiny spider.”
Glorfindel couldn’t help his reaction as he grew increasingly aware of Erestor’s scent that invaded his nostrils. And Erestor felt nice in his arms too – warm and pliant. Glorfindel blinked; such feelings were highly inappropriate at the moment. And why was he experiencing them now? He had never desired Erestor before. It had to be the close proximity they were in.
“I *did* wonder about your reaction,” Glorfindel said eventually.
“Now you know why I am terrified of spiders.” Erestor had regained control over his emotions and finally realized that he was in Glorfindel’s arms. The warrior’s hold on him was strong and Erestor wondered what had made Glorfindel reach out to him. It felt nice though, being held like that.
“I will gladly remove any spiders that sneak into your life, regardless of their size.” Glorfindel sucked in his breath – that sounded more romantic than he had intended.
“Will you?” Erestor was equally baffled. “Let me turn around so I can see your face?”
Glorfindel suddenly felt apprehensive, but complied and loosened his hold on Erestor.
The dark-haired Elf turned in the embrace and cocked his head, studying Glorfindel’s face in the moonlight. “I might have misjudged you,” he admitted shyly. “I thought you would ridicule me.”
Glorfindel squirmed uncomfortably. “That thought did cross my mind at first – to make fun of you – but then I realized you were really terrified and all I wanted was to take away that fear.” He timidly peeked at Erestor’s eyes, which still carried hints of the tears they had recently shed. “I might not always show it, but I do care about you.”
Erestor gave the warrior a sad smile. “I care about you as well, Glorfindel.” For one moment, his imagination obtained the better of him and he was convinced that Glorfindel was going to lean in closer and kiss him, but nothing happened. A pang of disappointment coursed through him when Glorfindel released him from the embrace.
Composing himself, Erestor took a step away from the warrior. “Thank you for…for being understanding.” His heart ached though. For one moment he had thought his dreams would come true and Glorfindel would declare that he loved him. But he had been deluding himself. Glorfindel didn’t love him. The warrior didn’t even know that Erestor was in love with him! A sigh escaped Erestor and he started to walk toward the Hall, returning privacy to Glorfindel.
Glorfindel felt confused. When he had been holding Erestor, he had felt something odd. Something he hadn’t felt in ages – since Ecthelion’s death to be exact. He recognized the feelings, but having them took him aback, especially since they were aimed at Erestor. His gaze shifted from the ground to Erestor’s form and he saw the hunched shoulders and the bowed head. Erestor looked miserable.
“Erestor? Wait!”
Erestor’s heart missed a beat and he turned his head to see why Glorfindel had called him back.
“Would you like to walk in the gardens? Or talk some more over a glass of wine?” Glorfindel blinked. His reluctance to let Erestor leave surprised even himself. The truth was that he wanted to spend more time in the Advisor’s company and learn more about him.
“I would like that,” Erestor answered and hoped his voice didn’t tremble as much as he thought it did.
“What do you prefer? To go for a walk or have a drink?” Glorfindel smiled and walked up to Erestor.
Erestor seldom ventured into the gardens since there was a risk he might encounter spiders there. Glorfindel might not have noticed it, but he spent most of his time inside the Last Homely House. “Maybe drink a glass of miruvor and listen to Lindir sing?” Erestor’s heartbeat sped up and he almost reached for Glorfindel’s hand with the intention of wrapping his fingers around the warrior’s, but stopped himself just in time. He didn’t know why Glorfindel wanted to spend the evening in his company, for it couldn’t be because the warrior was interested in him in *that* way, but he would allow himself to enjoy Glorfindel’s company since he didn’t know when he would have the pleasure of it again.
~~~
They spent the evening nursing a glass of wine and talking softly about the twins. The Elflings were a ‘safe’ topic, since both Elves loved the twins and they needed the common ground to start building a friendship. They only stopped talking to listen to Lindir sing.
It was already late when they rose from their chairs to leave for their rooms. As their quarters were located in the same wing, Glorfindel suggested they walked together. Erestor accepted and fell into step beside the warrior.
“I had a most pleasant evening,” Glorfindel said, smiling brightly at Erestor. The Chief Advisor was pleasant company to be around with once they had both relaxed and stopped arguing.
“I enjoyed your company too,” Erestor admitted softly. He had been careful when drinking his wine and was still sober. He had been tempted to drink more, but had been afraid of losing control if he did, so he had stopped himself short. “Maybe we could do this again?”
They had reached the door to Erestor’s rooms and came to a halt. Glorfindel nodded at hearing Erestor’s suggestion and said, “I like to spend my evenings at the Bruinen. Will you join me there tomorrow evening?” The request hit Erestor like a cold shower and his discomfort shone from his eyes. Glorfindel noticed it and frowned. “What did I do wrong?”
“You did nothing wrong.” Erestor felt embarrassed. “Glorfindel, I… I do not venture outside anymore. There are too many spiders in the gardens, the forest, and also near the Bruinen.”
Glorfindel arched an eyebrow. “You no longer go outside?” He hadn’t realized that Erestor’s fear was so overwhelming that it limited the Advisor in such a way.
“Seldom… Only when I can not avoid it and then the entire time I feel uncomfortable.”
“Erestor, there are no Mirkwood spiders in Imladris.” But Glorfindel realized that convincing Erestor would take more than just those words. “Do you not think it is about time you faced and overcame your fear?” An indignant expression appeared on Erestor’s face and Glorfindel quickly raised his hand to smother the Advisor’s protests. “I do not want to belittle your fear, my friend. I understand that they are real and you have valid grounds to feel that way. I am merely offering you my help.”
Erestor had wanted to lash out at Glorfindel, but the warrior’s words calmed him. “Glorfindel, I appreciate what you are trying to do, but I do not believe you can help me. Whenever I am faced with a spider – no matter how tiny – I freeze. You saw what happened this morning. I was paralyzed.”
“Please, Erestor. Give me one chance to help you. If it fails, I will never ask again.” Glorfindel used his most pleading look on Erestor, hoping it would work. “I do not like the fact that your fear limits you in such a way.”
Erestor wavered to accept. “Glorfindel, I am not sure I can do this.”
“Please, give me just one chance…just one… That is all I am asking.” In an attempt to convince Erestor, Glorfindel stepped forward and rested his hands on Erestor’s hunched shoulders. He half expected the Advisor to shrug them off, but this time, Erestor allowed it. Squeezing gently, he looked deeply into Erestor’s eyes. “Please, Erestor.”
Erestor couldn’t possibly deny Glorfindel when the warrior looked at him in such a pleading way. “One chance, Glorfindel...that is all I am giving you.”
“And that is enough!” Glorfindel didn’t know what made him do it, but he pulled Erestor close and buried him in a hug. It was the first time ever that Erestor allowed him to embrace him. Glorfindel rubbed the tense back and rested his chin on Erestor’s right shoulder. The fact that Erestor felt so good – so right – in his arms still amazed him. “Trust me.”
Erestor didn’t know what possessed him, but he nodded and accepted what Glorfindel was offering. “I trust you.” He always had, right from the start. But Glorfindel didn’t know that.
“Thank you.” Glorfindel actually regretted pulling back, but he had to release Erestor eventually since it was time for them to retire for the night. “And remember, if you need someone to remove a spider from your rooms, no matter what size the critter is, you can count on me. Call me.”
Erestor smiled. “Thank you. That offer means a lot to me.” They stood opposite each other, neither Elf wanting to say goodbye for the night. “I will see you tomorrow,” Erestor said when the silence became awkward. “Remember, we have to attend the council meeting in the morning.”
Glorfindel’s expression brightened at hearing that. “Aye, I remember. Maybe we could walk to the council room together? I can knock on your door when I am ready to leave.”
Erestor’s smile warmed. “Aye, you may knock on my door. I will be ready.”
The silence returned and both Elves actually gave each other shy looks.
“I should be going…” Glorfindel took a step away from Erestor. Saying goodbye, even for the night, was harder than it had ever been. “I will see you in the morning.”
Erestor forced himself to open his door. He wanted to follow Glorfindel into the Captain’s rooms, but that was out of the question. “I wish you sweet dreams, Glorfindel.”
Glorfindel blushed as he realized that he wanted those dreams to be about Erestor. “And may your sleep be peaceful and restful.” He opened the door to his chambers and quickly stepped inside. He closed the door behind him, leaned against it, and shook his head. What had happened that day? Things had changed when Erestor had confided in him. When Erestor had done that, Glorfindel had realized there was more to the Advisor than he had always thought. And the next day, he would not only spend more time with Erestor, but he would also do his best to heal the Advisor of his fear.
~~~
Elrond realized something had changed upon entering his study. Erestor was seated behind his desk working on the latest reports. Glorfindel was sitting opposite him, at times peeking at the writing Advisor. Elrond narrowed his eyes and studied Glorfindel in depth. He knew Erestor harbored romantic feelings for Glorfindel, but until this very moment, Elrond had believed they were unrequited. But looking at Glorfindel, Elrond wasn’t that certain any more. Glorfindel looked interested in Erestor and that was a first.
“Good morning,” Elrond said in an attempt to gain their attention. They hadn’t noticed his arrival since they had been focused on each other. This was quite an interesting development! One he wanted to know more of!
“Good morning, Elrond.” Erestor rose from behind his desk and walked over to Elrond’s desk carrying reports, which he placed on the half-Elf’s desk. “I already checked these.”
“And what did you find?” Elrond sat down and arranged his formal robes around him.
“Nothing out of the ordinary. There have been no disturbances,” Glorfindel answered in Erestor’s stead.
Elrond was curious to see how Erestor would react to Glorfindel answering for him. Normally, doing that would earn Glorfindel a tongue-lashing. But this time, nothing like that happened. Erestor merely nodded and returned to his desk. Elrond cocked his head and stared at Erestor. In the end, he decided to opt for a direct approach. “Erestor, did you tell Glorfindel about the spiders?”
Erestor looked up from the report which he had just placed in front of him. “I did,” he said, nodding his head. “Glorfindel knows what happened in Mirkwood all those years ago.”
“And I offered him my services,” Glorfindel added quickly. “If there needs to be any spider slaying done, I will do it for him.” Although, his eventual aim was to cure Erestor of his fear so the Advisor could deal with the critters himself. But in the meantime, he would assure Erestor of his support.
“Excellent!” Elrond smiled and leaned back into the comfort of his chair. /I should have ordered Erestor to tell Glorfindel a long time ago. It obviously brought them closer together. I hoped that would happen, but I could not be sure./ Since he had his answer, Elrond enjoyed the relaxed atmosphere and spent most of the day working on the paperwork with Erestor and Glorfindel assisting him.
~~~
“Erestor? Will you stay another hour? We really need to finish this.” Elrond disliked making the request, especially since it was obvious that Glorfindel was eager to call it a day and hog Erestor for the rest of the evening. Elrond had watched them the entire day and had seen Glorfindel smile repeatedly at Erestor.
“Of course I will.” Erestor managed to hide his disappointment. He had been about to ask Elrond permission to leave early, but the half-Elf had specifically asked him to stay!
Glorfindel frowned, but then perked up. Actually, this could work out well if he planned everything carefully. He hadn’t forgotten about his promise to help Erestor overcome his fear of spiders and intended to do so that evening. “I will head for the Bruinen for a refreshing swim. Join me there when you can. And Erestor...dress informally, leggings would be best, and bring two swords.” Elrond, who had overheard every word, grinned.
“Why?” Erestor gave Glorfindel a questioning look. “Do you expect danger to find us out there?”
“Nay, my friend. We are going to spar. I need the exercise and you probably do too.” Glorfindel briefly touched Erestor’s hand and the gesture made Erestor suck in his breath. Feeling encouraged, Glorfindel’s smile broadened. It was obvious that Erestor liked him back. “I will see you there.” After uttering the words, he exited Elrond’s study.
Elrond chuckled and by doing so, drew Erestor’s attention. “Why are you laughing?” Erestor asked puzzled.
“This is the first time in over a hundred years that you have been challenged to a sparring match. I hope you are still in shape.” Elrond’s words however didn’t quite match his thoughts. He was chuckling because Erestor hadn’t yet realized that Glorfindel was only using the sparring as an excuse – probably to instigate physical closeness.
“I never excelled at sword fighting and you know it.”
Elrond nodded. Erestor however *was* a talented archer. “We will make this quick. You do not wish to keep Glorfindel waiting, do you?” As expected, Erestor blushed. “Is there something you want to tell me, Erestor? About Glorfindel?” he added, hoping to steer his friend in the right direction.
“What is there to tell?” Erestor was on his guard.
“There is no shame in loving him, Erestor. Why do you not tell him? He might return your feelings. The way he looked at you today suggests he cares for you.”
“Did you notice that too? I thought I was imagining it. He *was* looking at me, was he not?”
Elrond walked over to Erestor, placed a hand on his Advisor’s shoulder, and nodded. “He *was* looking at you in that way. You should seize the moment, Erestor.”
Erestor smiled happily. He agreed with Elrond. If Glorfindel was really interested in him, he would be a fool *not* to act on it!
~~~
Glorfindel sat cross-legged on the riverbank and focused his thoughts. It had been decades since he had last tried to send out a mental call and he wasn’t certain he would still manage. But for his plan to work it was important that he could reach Erestor’s mind.
~~~
Erestor collected the two swords which usually served as decoration for his room. They hung on the wall and, although it had been centuries since they last saw battle, their blades were still sharp. Turning around, Erestor was confronted with his reflection in the mirror. He hardly recognized himself. He hadn’t worn leggings since that fateful trip into Mirkwood and had actually had to search for the garments at the bottom of his closet. The green shirt and brown leggings allowed him to blend in with the forest, a quality which had helped him escape enemies in the past – spiders even.
He drew in a deep breath and stared at his reflection. On the outside, he appeared to be a normal Elf, but on the inside, he had been damaged. The Mirkwood spiders had changed him, had put the fear of the monsters in him, and Erestor didn’t know if he could keep his word and visit Glorfindel at the Bruinen. In order to be there, he would have to cross the forest and he just knew the trees, leaves, and bushes were full of spiders. Tiny spiders perhaps, but they still made him flash back to their larger cousins.
“Glorfindel is right,” he said aloud in an effort to find the courage to rise to the challenge. “There are no Mirkwood spiders in Imladris. I am safe here.” But he wouldn’t feel safe the moment he left the Last Homely House. “I can not do this.”
/Erestor? Is Elrond still keeping you? Ask him to let you go… It is already becoming late. The sun is about to set./
Glorfindel’s thoughts twined around his loud and clear and, in his surprise, Erestor dropped the swords onto the floor. /Glorfindel?/ The warrior had never instigated any far-speaking before and Erestor was baffled that Glorfindel was doing it now. Sharing thoughts was considered to be an intimate means of communication, one set aside for lovers.
/Hurry, Erestor!/
Glorfindel’s presence retreated from his mind and Erestor picked the swords up from the floor. His hands still trembled though. What did that intimate touch in his mind from Glorfindel mean? Elrond was right then – Glorfindel wanted more from him and that thought made him happy.
“I will set my fear aside for you, Glorfindel,” Erestor promised. “Only for you.”
He made his way into the corridor and toward the exit then stepped into the open. It was a scary experience because he hadn’t ventured outside for years. The huge space around him felt almost threatening.
/There are spiders out there,/ Erestor couldn’t help thinking. /Hundreds, maybe thousands of spiders!/
/I will keep you safe. Come to me, Erestor. Do not keep me waiting any longer./
Erestor sighed and began to walk away from the Last Homely House. His feet dragged over the ground and he kept his gaze fixed on the earth. /I can do this… I can do this… I *will* do this…for Glorfindel./ He continued to repeat the words in his mind and, in the end, he started to believe them – a little bit.
~~~
Glorfindel discovered the cave while he was waiting for Erestor to join him. Although he had often been at the Bruinen before, he had never noticed the cave. He ventured inside deeper and deeper. His curiosity took the better of him and, since Elven sight was perfect in the dark, he explored the cave.
Suddenly, the hair on the back of his neck stood rigid and his instincts alerted him that something was wrong. A terrible shriek sounded from behind him and he turned around, ready to face the possible intruder.
Glorfindel froze, suddenly facing Erestor’s nightmare. It was a huge Mirkwood spider that had snuck up on him and it was agitated. It reared its front legs, cocked its ugly head, and attacked.
~~~
Erestor had reached the outskirts of the woods that presented a natural barrier between the Bruinen and Imladris when a terrible pain slashed through his head. He clutched his head, collapsed onto his knees, and rocked, trying to weather the storm. The mental attack had taken him by surprise and he suffered through it until the agony eventually subsided. “Glorfindel,” he whispered in-between deep panting.
His vision turned blurry and he felt unsteady as he pushed himself back to his feet. He rested one hand against the trunk of a tree and rubbed his brow with the other one. “What happened? Glorfindel? Glorfindel!” he screamed the last call of the beloved name into the woods.
Erestor felt trapped. Whatever had happened to Glorfindel was serious enough to incapacitate him. He didn’t sense the warrior’s thoughts currently and could only reach the conclusion that Glorfindel had lost consciousness. “What do I do?” he whispered, questioning the forest for answers.
He couldn’t go back to the Last Homely House to fetch reinforcements. He would lose precious time by doing that and Glorfindel might not have that time. But he couldn’t continue either. He felt wobbly and didn’t know if he would be any help if he encountered any danger on his way to Glorfindel.
Danger – Danger was lurking in these woods for it had taken out Glorfindel.
“What do I do?” he repeated the question, but he still didn’t receive an answer. “Well, at least I am armed.” But was he still in shape? Would he be able to help Glorfindel defeat the danger that hid in the woods? Did he have a choice?
Erestor curled his fingers around the hilt of one sword and drew it from its sheath. He felt grateful that he had brought two – he might need them. He was about to resume his journey deeper into the woods when his gaze came upon a branch to his right. The branch was occupied: a spider was busy weaving its web there.
Erestor’s mouth went dry, his hands became sweaty, and the sword almost fled his grip. For one moment, Erestor was back in Mirkwood forest and was running away from the group of spiders that were hunting him. In his mind, he saw the fallen guards, stabbed, poisoned, and being readied for consumption. He couldn’t do this after all!
/Erestor!/
Suddenly Glorfindel was back in his mind, calling to him in obvious distress. Erestor tried to calm the warrior, but since Erestor was experiencing a panic attack himself, he was of little help to Glorfindel.
/Erestor, go home! Fetch Elrond and the guards. Do not come closer! I repeat, do not come closer and go home!/
/Nay! Glorfindel, I can sense your distress! I am not deserting you!/ Once he was reminded of why he had to continue, Erestor found a way to deal with his fear. His fingers wrapped tightly around the hilt and he resolutely headed toward the Bruinen. /Keep sending me your thoughts. It will help me find you./
/Nay, Erestor, go back! You need to fetch help! You can not do this alone!/ Glorfindel panicked and revealed the truth. /One of those spiders invaded our lands, Erestor. One of Mirkwood’s spiders roams these woods. Go back!/
Erestor froze in his tracks. “What?” He must have misunderstood! But he was close now. He sensed Glorfindel’s presence and used the warrior’s thoughts to hone in on him. Following the link guided him to a cave near the river. “Are you in there?”
“Erestor, stay away! The monster might still be in here!”
Erestor’s nerves raged while his heart pounded like mad and pumped the blood through his veins at record speed. Erestor almost began to hyperventilate as he came to realize that he had to face his worst nightmare, but he would do so for Glorfindel. He had seen those spiders suck their victims dry and he wouldn’t let that happen to Glorfindel – never!
Raising his sword, Erestor ventured into the cave. Lessons which he had thought long forgotten resurfaced and guided him through the dark soundlessly and without giving away his position. There was still a bit of the warrior inside him, even when he hadn’t let him out for years.
Erestor approached the back of the cave though so far there were no signs of the spider. For one moment, Erestor considered the possibility of Glorfindel making it up, but he instantly dismissed the idea. Why would Glorfindel do that? What purpose would that serve?
“Glorfindel?” Erestor swallowed hard upon locating Glorfindel’s cocooned form. The spider had wrapped its web around him and had hung Glorfindel from the ceiling. The white threads kept the warrior in place and prevented him from making any movement. “I will cut you loose.”
“Erestor, be careful. It might still be here.” Glorfindel couldn’t believe that Erestor was doing this. The Advisor, who had frozen at the sight of a tiny spider the other day, was now running the risk of facing a Mirkwood spider for his sake.
Erestor cut Glorfindel loose, but wasn’t quick enough to catch the Captain when he fell onto the ground. He hurried over to him and knelt at Glorfindel’s side. “Are you injured?”
Glorfindel took stock and shook his head. “I am not. I merely need to get the blood flow going again.” Just how long had he been suspended from the ceiling? “Erestor, go back to the Last Homely House and warn them. I am going after that spider.”
“Nay, you are not. Not alone.” Erestor knew from personal experience what damage a Mirkwood spider could do and he wasn’t going to allow Glorfindel to hunt it alone.
“Erestor, we do not have the time to argue about-” Glorfindel didn’t receive a chance to finish his sentence as another one of the horrible shrieks echoed through the cave.
The spider was back. It stood with its back against the wall to make sure that no Elf could attack it from behind and directed its beady black eyes on its prey. Raising a front leg, it shrieked again, planning on spearing the blond Elf’s chest with its claw.
Shocked, Erestor froze. His worst nightmare had come true. The huge spider had somehow escaped Mirkwood forest and had penetrated Elrond’s lands. It had found shelter in this cave and now it planned on taking out the two Elves who had discovered its presence. They were going to die there – Erestor was convinced of that. The spider would kill first Glorfindel and then him. It had already raised its claw to bury the barbed hooks in the Captain’s chest and once it had done so, it would lift its prey and play with him before sucking him dry.
Glorfindel was about to raise the sword which he had unhooked from Erestor’s belt but then the Advisor released a howling scream. Erestor threw his sword and it buried itself between the spider’s eyes. It ate itself a way deep into the skull and the monster wailed in pain and fear.
“Erestor!” Uncertain if the attack alone would take out the spider, Glorfindel moved and pulled Erestor out of the danger zone. With one arm curled around Erestor’s waist, he maneuvered the Advisor toward the exit and then told him to run. But Erestor shook his head.
“Finish it, Glorfindel!” Erestor raised his hand and pointed at the staggering spider that loomed behind them. “Kill it!”
“Stay here! I do not want to have to worry about you!”
Erestor nodded. “Be careful!”
Glorfindel turned around, charged, and plunged his sword in the beast’s chest. That, combined with the damage which Erestor’s sword had already caused, ended the spider’s existence. It released a terrible screech and then collapsed, its legs no longer able to support the weight. The eight legs twitched, convulsions shook the hairy body, and then the eyes glazed over. The spider was dead.
With the danger gone, Erestor returned to Glorfindel’s side. “Kick it. Make sure it is dead.”
Glorfindel complied and kicked one of the legs. There was no reaction. “It is dead.” Erestor leaned heavily against Glorfindel and the Captain promptly wrapped an arm around him. Erestor had surprised the two of them by throwing that sword. “You did well,” Glorfindel told Erestor. He pulled him close and smiled when the raven head used his shoulder as a pillow. “You bested your fear.”
Erestor stared at the dead spider in disgust. “The reports did not mention spider activity. How did it get here? And why was it not noticed? Elrond could have taken his family to the Bruinen for a picnic and they would have been defenseless.”
“I will inform the sentries to be more alert, although I do not believe that there will be more spiders invading our lands. They live in Mirkwood...that is their home. They have no business here.”
“Tell your guards to be alert. If there is even an inkling of a suspicion that there might be more spiders hiding in these woods, I want it reported and the spiders killed.”
Glorfindel nodded. “You are right. Of course you are right. We should have caught this one before it could use the cover of the woods to hide.”
“I want to leave this place.” Erestor took Glorfindel’s hand in his and dragged the Captain with him. Once they were outside and standing underneath the moon’s silver beams, Erestor drew in a series of deep breaths. “I was scared for you.” He turned around, tightening his hold on Glorfindel’s hand as he stared into the blue eyes. “When I heard your thoughts in my mind… Why did you reach out to me in that way? You were not in any danger that first time you contacted me.”
Glorfindel guiltily averted his gaze and stared at the grass. “I had made plans, Erestor. I wanted to make you believe that I was in danger and that you had to come to the rescue. That way, I hoped you would forget your fear of spiders.”
Erestor shook his head and his eyes shone with disbelief. “You were going to manipulate me.”
“I promised to help you overcome your fear and I asked you for one chance to do so. You told me yes and I acted.” Glorfindel slowly raised his head and hesitantly made eye contact with Erestor. “Are you angry with me?”
“I should be,” Erestor mumbled. “I want to be angry with you…”
“But?” Glorfindel asked hopefully.
“I am much too happy we survived that spider’s attack. I can not be angry with you. I still see you hanging from the ceiling, cocooned in its web.” Would he ever forget that particular image? “Now another nightmare will haunt my sleep.”
Glorfindel swallowed hard. “Erestor? I did not do this on purpose. I did not know there was a spider roaming the woods.”
Erestor had calmed and, although he was still annoyed that Glorfindel had planned to trick him, he had already forgiven the Captain. After all, that was what you did when you loved someone. “We should return to the Last Homely House. Elrond might be worried. He surely picked up on some of the commotion.” Elrond was connected to the lands and would have felt the disturbance.
“Erestor?” Since Erestor’s fingers were still wrapped around his, Glorfindel raised the Advisor’s hand to his lips and pressed a kiss onto the back. “You should not be alone tonight.”
Erestor blinked. “Are you worried about those nightmares I mentioned?”
“That too, but… I want you close. I need you close… When I was locked up in that cocoon, I had time to think and I realized that I would have hated dying without having kissed you just once.” Seizing the moment, Glorfindel touched his lips to Erestor’s. Erestor was too surprised to pull away nor did he want to pull back. Glorfindel kissing him like that had surprised him, but he welcomed it nonetheless. Glorfindel reluctantly released Erestor’s lips and searched the other Elf’s dilated pupils. “Will you allow me into your bed tonight, Erestor?”
“By the Valar, yes, I will!” Erestor decided not to question his luck. If Glorfindel wanted him, the warrior could have him.
~~~
Elrond already awaited them in the courtyard when they made it back to the Last Homely House an hour later. The half-Elf had gathered the guards and gestured for Glorfindel and Erestor to approach upon catching sight of them. “I know what has happened,” he informed them. “I am angry with myself for not noticing the spider earlier.” He had been preoccupied with his family, enjoying the twins’ antics and had not been as alert as he should have been. “I am taking a squadron out there to search the woods for more threats.”
“I should come with you,” Glorfindel answered. “I am your Captain.”
“You showed enough courage for today. Enjoy the rest… You earned it.” Elrond’s gaze then shifted from Glorfindel’s face to Erestor’s and he smiled at his friend. “I told you that you could do it, but you never believed me.” He had spoken with Erestor countless times, trying to convince him that he could overcome his fear. “I suggest the two of you clean up and rest. I will inform you of my findings upon my return!” After his declaration, Elrond mounted his horse and steered the animal away from Glorfindel and Erestor. Raising a hand, he signaled the guards to leave.
There was little Glorfindel and Erestor could do but watch the patrol leave the courtyard and disappear in the distance. In the end, Erestor used his hold on Glorfindel’s hand to pull him into the house. Glorfindel let Erestor guide the way and wasn’t surprised when they ended up standing in front of Erestor’s rooms.
Erestor opened the door and gently pulled Glorfindel inside then closed the door again. Leading Glorfindel into the bathroom, he then had to let go of the warrior’s hand in order to turn the taps which would release the warm water into the pool carved into the floor. “You have the spider’s dark blood on you.” Erestor shivered at the sight of the blood in Glorfindel’s hair. “Let me remove it.”
Glorfindel smiled warmly at Erestor and both Elves removed their soiled clothes. Once the pool was filled, Erestor added some bath oil to it before taking Glorfindel’s hand in his again and led the warrior into the water.
All of this happened without them speaking another word. It was right and it was understood. At the moment they didn’t need words to express their feelings.
They washed each other’s hair while bestowing gentle caresses onto each other’s bodies before they ended up sitting close, holding each other. Glorfindel rested his head against Erestor’s shoulder and savored the peace and quiet.
They remained like that for a few more minutes, but when the water began to cool, they were forced to leave the pool. Erestor reached for a morning robe and wrapped the soft material around Glorfindel’s form. Then, he slipped into one as well and gathered Glorfindel’s hand in his once more.
Glorfindel turned questioning eyes to Erestor and allowed the dark-haired Elf to walk him to the bed. Lying down, Glorfindel stretched out onto his back, while Erestor moved onto his side. Erestor rested his head on Glorfindel’s shoulder, draped an arm across the warrior’s muscular chest, and placed his leg atop Glorfindel’s thigh.
“Already growing possessive of me?” Glorfindel asked, tempted to tease Erestor since the dark-haired Elf was staking his claim by wrapping himself around him.
“Aye, I am.” Erestor nuzzled Glorfindel’s throat and blissfully inhaled the warrior’s scent, which had mixed with the scented bath oil. “You smell of lilacs.”
“Do I?” Glorfindel raised a hand so he could run his fingers through Erestor’s still damp hair. “I am so proud of you, Erestor. You set aside your fear to save me. I owe you my life.”
Erestor raised his head so he could look into Glorfindel’s eyes. To his surprise, he found them swimming with tears. “I would do anything for you.”
Glorfindel swallowed nervously. “Erestor, I think I love you.”
“I thought as much. Even Elrond noticed you giving me certain looks.” Erestor rested his chin on Glorfindel’s chest and smiled lazily at the golden-haired Elf. “I have loved you for a long time. I just did not dare mention it to you out of fear of rejection.”
Glorfindel smiled and rubbed the raven strands between his fingers. “In a way, we owe that tiny spider that crawled out from between your papers. If it had not been for that critter, we would not have realized the truth.” Raising his head a little, he brought his lips closer to Erestor’s. “Are you still afraid of spiders, Erestor?”
Erestor chuckled momentarily and his eyes showed true mirth and happiness within them. “Maybe I am, maybe I am not. Glorfindel, my champion, will you slay them for me at any rate?”
Glorfindel’s lips brushed Erestor’s when he nodded his head. “Aye, I will. My sword is yours, along with my heart.”
“Poetically spoken, my love,” Erestor said and finally brought their lips together to instigate a kiss. Yes, in a way Glorfindel was right: that itsy, bitsy spider had brought them together and was the reason they were in bed, kissing. Glorfindel had cured him of his fear and for that he would always love his champion.
The end
After the story was posted I got this in the mail from Togro! I found it very amusing and was allowed to add it to the story! Thanks!