Title: The
Author: Morgana
Author’s Email:
Web page: http://www.paranoid.nl/avalon
Pairing:
Erestor/Legolas
Rating:
NC-17
Summary: After Erestor reveals his feelings to Glorfindel, Glorfindel finds it
hard to embrace those and in the end, Erestor runs away from Imladris. He ends
up in Mirkwood.
Disclaimer:
Not mine. These characters belong to Professor Tolkien. No copyright
infringement is intended. I'm not making any money out of these stories!
Warning: AU of course.
Beta read by Patricia and DA, thanks sweeties!
All
remaining mistakes are mine.
The
Glorfindel’s
head snapped up at hearing Erestor’s answer. At first, he thought – hoped – he
had misheard, but when he saw the misery reflected on Erestor’s face, he
realized he had heard correctly. Erestor had indeed whispered his name. “I do
not understand,” Glorfindel whispered. He felt nervous and even a bit upset.
Erestor
had become used to hiding behind his long hair, but since it had been braided
that morning, he no longer had the means to hide. He wore warrior’s braids now
for, with his coming of age, he had earned the right to do so and had savored
being allowed to wear his hair in that fashion. But now he realized the
disadvantages that came with the hair style.
“I
could not help falling in love with you,” he mumbled, wishing it was just the
two of them present. Still, it was fortunate that only Elrond and his family
could overhear his words, but Erestor still wanted the floor to swallow him.
Elrond
realized he had to act and quickly shooed Erestor and Glorfindel into an
adjoining room. The twins, Melpomaen, and Lindir followed and the minstrel
closed the door behind them. They all considered Erestor family and wanted to
offer support should Erestor need it.
Erestor
didn’t dare raise his gaze to look Glorfindel in the eye. He felt utterly
embarrassed and ashamed. It was Elrond’s fault; why had the Elf-Lord demanded
he answer? He bowed his head, wrapped his arms around his waist, and stared at
the floor.
Elrond
felt at a loss and gave Glorfindel a pleading look. What course of action would
be best? Thankfully Glorfindel had composed himself and even managed a weak
smile. He walked toward Erestor and came to a halt in front of the dark-haired
Elf. He felt sorry for Erestor, who must feel humiliated on this day which
should have been festive and joyous. “Erestor? We need
to talk.” Glorfindel took hold of Erestor’s arm and guided him to a corner of
the room since he wanted them to have some privacy. Elrond tried to follow, but
Glorfindel gave his friend a look that told him not to follow. “Sit down,
Erestor.”
Erestor
sat down on the windowsill. He still refused to meet Glorfindel’s gaze though.
He had never felt this embarrassed before. Glorfindel seated himself next to
Erestor and gathered one of the trembling hands into his. “Erestor?
Will you look at me?”
“I
would rather not.” Erestor was grateful that Elrond, the twins, Melpomaen, and
Lindir remained at a distance. He couldn’t deal with them at the moment. “I
feel ashamed.”
Glorfindel
did his best to put himself in Erestor’s place and quickly realized how
humiliated Erestor had to feel. “I never realized you had fallen in love with
me, Erestor.” It was the truth. He had never considered the fact that Erestor
could have fallen for him. “I am flattered. I really am, but…” How was he going
to explain this without hurting Erestor’s feelings?
All
Erestor heard was that one little word: but. He had known that Glorfindel
didn’t have feelings for him and that was the reason why he had wanted to keep
his feelings a secret. But then Elrond had forced him to admit the truth in
public. “But you do not love me back.”
Glorfindel
raised a hand and placed a finger beneath Erestor’s chin so he could lift the
handsome face. Erestor averted his gaze though and stared past him. Oh, he
really didn’t want to hurt the younger half-Elf, but he had no choice.
“Erestor, I love you like a son.” And that was the problem. He had helped
raised Erestor. The boy had slept in his arms. Glorfindel had kept the
nightmares away. He had ‘adopted’ Erestor – just as Elrond had – and he loved
Erestor like the other Elf was his own flesh and blood. “I look upon you as my
son, Erestor.”
Erestor
heard the damning words and closed his eyes. “That is why I never told you, but
Adar forced me. I never wanted you to know.” He successfully fought back his
tears. He wasn’t going to add to his embarrassment by crying in front of
Glorfindel. “I do not know when it happened, but suddenly, I was dreaming about
you in a romantic way. I tried to stop feeling that way, but my feelings
continued to deepen.”
Glorfindel
rubbed Erestor’s cold fingers between his. His facial features contorted with
worry and even pity. “I should not be surprised that this has happened. You think
of me as your hero and falling in love with me is logical.” Erestor didn’t
reply. He simply continued to stare at the wall. He knew what was coming. “I am
sorry, Erestor, but we can not be together in that way. I will always look upon
you as my child – my flesh and blood. I love you with all my being, but I can
not take the next step and become lovers. It would feel wrong.” Glorfindel was
trying to let Erestor down as gently as possible. “Do not despair though,
Erestor. You have become a handsome young Elf and any Elf would be happy to
become your lover. And I…I am more than content to be your Adar.”
But
Erestor didn’t want Glorfindel to think of him as his son! He wanted Glorfindel
to see him as a potential lover! He knew better though than to try to change
Glorfindel’s mind. He would only embarrass himself by pleading with Glorfindel
to accept him as his lover. “I am sorry if I caused you any embarrassment,”
Erestor said quietly.
“It
is my fault,” Elrond said as he had joined them after all. He had overheard
their conversation and realized that he was also to blame for Erestor’s
problems. “I should not have pressured you to tell me.”
Erestor
shrugged his shoulders. “I was always afraid that my secret would come out.”
Erestor bowed his head again and stared at the floor. “Now things will be
awkward between the two of us.” Things between Glorfindel and him had changed
forever. Glorfindel would never again feel comfortable when hugging him.
Glorfindel would always keep in mind that Erestor harbored feelings for him.
How could he continue living in Imladris like that?
“I
will always love you, Erestor.” Glorfindel wanted to pull Erestor into an
embrace, but felt insecure, not knowing how the half-Elf would interpret such a
gesture. “I will always be there for you.”
But
Erestor knew that things had changed forever. In a way he had lost the most
important person in the world. Glorfindel would never act normal around him
again.
~~~
“Erestor?” Melpomaen had finally located the elusive young
Elf in a secluded part of the gardens. He had hoped he would find Erestor where
Lindir and he loved to sit and hold hands. Erestor knew about their hideaway
since he had at times joined them to listen to Lindir sing love songs.
Erestor didn’t look up. He
sat with his knees pulled close to his chest beneath an old oak tree. He had
removed the warrior’s braids in his hair and the raven strands now hid his face
from Melpomaen’s inquisitive gaze. Melpomaen sat down next to Erestor and
rested his hands in his lap. He remained quiet for a few minutes to give
Erestor a chance to start their conversation.
“I ruined everything,”
Erestor mumbled eventually. He rested the back of his head against the trunk of
the tree and stared at the stars set in a dark sky. “I should never have told
Elrond that I had fallen in love with Glorfindel.”
Melpomaen turned his head
and studied Erestor’s face, which appeared worried. “Elrond feels guilty for
forcing you to tell him. He wished he had not done so. But the past is the past
and can not be changed.”
Erestor nodded once.
“Everything is different now. In the past, when Glorfindel saw I was hurting,
he would embrace me and comfort me. He has already stopped doing that.” Erestor
laughed bitterly.
Melpomaen placed a hand on
Erestor’s knee and squeezed reassuringly. “Glorfindel feels stunned. Give him
time to accept that your feelings for him have changed. Your admission did come
as a surprise. No one expected that.” They had been fools; they should have
realized that Erestor’s hero worship could change into infatuation. “You are
still young, Erestor. You will fall out of love with Glorfindel and then you
will find an Elf your age and fall in love again.”
Erestor shook his head and
closed his eyes. “Glorfindel is the only one for me.”
Melpomaen smiled weakly.
“You feel like that because you are in love for the very first time. Believe me
when I say that you will fall in love again. Lindir is not the first Elf I ever
was in love with, but he *is* the first Elf who loves me back as much as I love
him.”
“Your words offer me no
comfort,” Erestor said. He rose from the earth and looked about.
Erestor seemed lost to
Melpomaen. It was as if Erestor was searching for something, or maybe someone,
Glorfindel probably. “You should take your time to recover from this
infatuation, Erestor. Glorfindel does not love you less because your feelings
have deepened. You will always have a very good friend in Glorfindel.”
A good friend...but he
wanted and needed more. “Thank you for coming out here to talk to me,” Erestor
said in what he hoped was a calm voice. “I am going back to my rooms now.” In
his thoughts, a plan was taking shape and he needed to appear calm so Melpomaen
would let him go and stop watching him. “I have much to think about.”
“That is true,” Melpomaen
admitted. “Erestor, you can always come to me to talk. You know that, do you
not?”
Erestor forced himself to
look Melpomaen in the eye. “I know that, Mel. Thank you for everything you have
done for me – are still doing for me. You are the best friend I could have
hoped for.” After uttering those words, Erestor began to walk back to the Last
Homely House.
Melpomaen frowned.
Something Erestor had said – or maybe it was the way Erestor had said it – made
him uncomfortable and caused his worries to increase. Erestor had sounded
formal, almost like he had been saying goodbye.
~~~
Erestor packed his most
precious belongings into his saddle bags. When Elrond had brought him to
Imladris all those years ago, he had been convinced that he would stay forever,
but now, everything had changed. He couldn’t possibly stay since things had
become so awkward and wanted to make things easier on Glorfindel and Elrond as
well.
He stuffed a spare set of
clothes into the saddle bags, as well as a hair clip that Glorfindel had gifted
to him the other year. He didn’t want to leave it behind and it would serve to
remind him that Glorfindel *did* love him, but not in the way he wanted the
Captain to love him.
Erestor checked to see if
the corridor was empty and then made his way to the stables. He went straight
ahead to his mare, Edenlas, who had been a gift from
Haldir. The mare raised her head and watched him with intelligent eyes.
“We are leaving,” Erestor
informed the mare. “And you are coming with me.” Erestor placed the saddle bags
on her back, saddled her up, and mounted. “You must be quiet now. No one must
hear us.” Dusk was spreading across the valley and would hide him from curious
eyes, but the sound of her hoofs could still give him away.
Erestor felt relieved once
they reached the safety of the woods that surrounded Imladris. Standing in the
stirrups, he looked over his shoulder and imprinted the outline of the Last
Homely House in his mind. It used to be his home…but now he was homeless.
Sitting down again, he
guided the mare toward the main road that would take him away from Imladris. He
didn’t know where he was going. Until that moment, he hadn’t given it any
thought. He could go to the Golden Wood. Celeborn and Galadriel would allow him
to stay and Haldir would take him in. Haldir and he had become friends over the
years, thanks to Elrohir, who had encouraged their friendship. But, if he went
to the Golden Wood, Elrond would be informed and the Elf-Lord would come for
him...Erestor was convinced of that. And he didn’t want to return to Imladris
and cause Glorfindel and Elrond more embarrassment. So, the Golden Wood was out
of the question after all.
Where else could he go? He
shivered at the thought of having to turn to the race of Men for shelter. Old
almost forgotten memories surfaced and reminded him that humans could never be
trusted. He had to avoid them at all cost.
There really was no place
for him to go. Maybe he should let fate decide. Giving his mare free rein, he
allowed her to take him wherever she chose.
~~~
“Elrond, I should have
realized what was happening, but I was blind.” Glorfindel felt terrible for
having to reject Erestor. “I should have known something like that could
happen!” He banged his fist on Elrond’s desk and glared at his friend. “You
could have warned me!”
“Like you, I did not see
it coming,” Elrond answered soothingly, trying to placate Glorfindel. He
understood his friend perfectly. Both of them looked upon Erestor as their son
and Elrond could never harbor any romantic feelings for Erestor. The same
applied to Glorfindel. “We must be careful when we talk to Erestor, Glorfindel.
He already feels guilty and humiliated.”
Glorfindel nodded. “Having
to reject him hurt me as well. Believe me, I do not wish to add to his
anguish.” But Elrond was right: Erestor and Glorfindel needed to talk some
more. “Things have already become uncomfortable. I feel awkward when I want to
hug him because I am afraid he will misinterpret the gesture. Elrond, why did
this have to happen? Why did Erestor not fall in love with a nice Elf his own
age?”
Elrond sighed. “Sometimes
things do not go the way we want them to.” Melpomaen entered the room and
remained near the doorway, wanting to make certain that he wasn’t interrupting.
“Come closer and sit down. We need your council.” During the last few years,
Melpomaen had grown in his role of Advisor and Elrond highly valued Melpomaen’s
opinion.
Melpomaen seated himself
and probed Glorfindel’s eyes. He tried to put himself in Glorfindel’s place and
realized how guilty his friend must feel. “I talked to Erestor,” he said,
wanting to steer their conversation in the desired direction. “He seems lost,
Glorfindel – adrift.”
“I feel the same way,”
Glorfindel admitted with a sigh. “I will talk to Erestor and try to put his
worries to rest.”
“You had better hurry,”
Melpomaen advised. “There was something in his voice that worries me.”
Glorfindel’s eyes
narrowed. “What do you mean?”
“When he was going to
return to his rooms, his farewell sounded so final...like he was truly saying
goodbye.”
Glorfindel didn’t like the
way that sounded and was jolted into action. “I will speak to him *now*!”
Glorfindel jumped to his feet and marched out of the room.
Elrond bowed his head and
sighed, blaming himself for what had happened. “Why could I not let the matter
rest? I should never have pressured Erestor into telling me.”
“You did not know Erestor
would speak Glorfindel’s name,” Melpomaen answered thoughtfully. “But I agree
that you should not have pushed Erestor into telling you. That was wrong. You
know Erestor has his reasons to be the way he is. You could have trusted him
and let the matter rest.”
“But I did not.” Elrond
shook his head. “I should stop meddling in private affairs.”
“You meant well. You
wanted what was best for Erestor. Unfortunately, it backfired.” Melpomaen knew
Elrond had only had the best intentions, but unfortunately things had gone
wrong. “Do not blame yourself. Erestor’s secret would have come out in the open
sooner or later.” He was convinced that Erestor couldn’t have kept his feelings
a secret forever.
“But I *do* blame myself.”
Elrond shook his head. He would do whatever he could to make amends.
~~~
The distance between
Erestor and Imladris continued to increase. He let his mare choose where to go,
but always kept alert, since he didn’t want to run into humans. He wanted
nothing to do with them. His past experiences had shaped him and, if he had the
choice, he would never go near them again.
~~~
Glorfindel knocked impatiently
on Erestor’s door. “Can I come inside so we can talk, Erestor? Please, this is
important.” Glorfindel gave Erestor another moment to compose himself. The
upcoming conversation would be hard on both of them. “Erestor?
I am coming inside.”
Glorfindel pushed down the
door handle. For one moment he was afraid that Erestor had locked the door, but
a moment later, the door opened and he stepped inside. Looking about, he tried
to locate Erestor, but the first thing he noticed was the disarray in the
rooms. Normally Erestor kept everything perfectly tidy, but at the moment the
rooms were a mess. There were clothes, scrolls, books, and blankets everywhere.
Glorfindel’s heart missed
a beat when a terrible suspicion came over him: a suspicion which quickly
changed into fear. “Erestor? Where are you?” His heart
thumped madly in his chest. “Erestor? Please be here!”
The thought that Erestor had run away filled him with guilt and dread. Although
Erestor was now an adult and a capable warrior, Glorfindel shuddered at the
thought of Erestor being out there on his own.
To Glorfindel, Erestor had
always remained the child that had once depended on him. It was the very reason
why Erestor’s admission that he loved him had shocked him so much. He had
always felt like a parent where Erestor was concerned. “Erestor, you should not
have run.” No matter what, they would have found a solution to their ‘problem’.
Glorfindel spun around and
headed for Elrond’s rooms. He had to inform his friend that Erestor had left
the Last Homely House!
~~~
“Elrond!” Glorfindel barged into the room and came to a halt
in front of the half-Elf. “We must act quickly! Erestor has left the Last
Homely House!”
Elrond rose from his chair
and stared at Glorfindel in disbelief. “What?”
Melpomaen stood as well
and gave Glorfindel a worried look. “I was afraid that he might do something
like that.”
“We must track him down!”
Elrond had needed a moment to accept what had happened and sort out his
thoughts. “Glorfindel, assemble a search group.”
Glorfindel turned to carry
out Elrond’s order when Melpomaen cleared his throat and raised a hand. “Wait,”
the Advisor said, stopping Glorfindel from leaving the room.
“Why? We are losing
precious time, Melpomaen.” Glorfindel was about to ignore Melpomaen and march
out anyway, but a certain expression in the Adviser’s eyes stopped him.
“Do you really want to
force Erestor to return to Imladris? He left for a reason, Glorfindel.”
Melpomaen hoped that his words would make Elrond and Glorfindel consider
everything carefully. “What will you gain by forcing Erestor to return?”
Elrond swallowed hard.
“Glorfindel, Melpomaen raises a valid point which we must discuss. Forcing
Erestor to tell me who had captured his heart caused this situation in the
first place.”
“You can not possibly
suggest that we let him go!” Glorfindel glared at Melpomaen. “Erestor led a
sheltered life the last few years and he does not know how to survive in the
outside world!”
“You underestimate him,”
Elladan retorted. Elrohir and he had been passing by Elrond’s rooms and had
overheard the argument. “Erestor can take care of himself.”
“You do not understand,”
Glorfindel snapped as he grew pale. “You do not know the danger he faces.”
Elrohir cocked his head.
“Glorfindel, with all due respect, Erestor is a capable warrior who can deal
with any enemies he might encounter.”
“But Elrond, what if he
runs into any humans?” Glorfindel looked pleadingly at Elrond. “Only Elbereth
knows what will happen then!”
“He can easily avoid
dealing with any humans,” Elrohir said confidently. “He is an accomplished
tracker.”
“You do not understand,”
Glorfindel repeated. But Elrond and Melpomaen would. “What if his past catches
up with him and his memories overwhelm him? What if he reverts back to…?”
“To
what?” Elrohir had always
suspected that they hadn’t been told everything where Erestor was concerned.
There was something in Erestor’s past that had been carefully kept from them.
Elrond sighed deeply. He
had hoped this moment would never come, but the past had caught up with them
after all. “Sit down and I will tell you what you want to know.” The twins
settled down near the fire place and listened to their father telling the
horrible tale of how Erestor had become Elrond’s youngest son.
~~~
Elladan felt miserable
after learning the truth. “And I treated him so awfully.” But looking at it in
retrospect, he agreed with his father that it had been best to keep this information
from him. As an Elfling, he would have used this knowledge against Erestor. He
would have made Erestor’s life even more unbearable.
Elrond shrugged and tried
to comfort his son. “It is in the past. And Elladan, you made amends.”
Glorfindel, still
impatiently shuffling his feet, looked Elrond in the eye. “What do we do? We
can not let him leave like that.”
Melpomaen cocked his head.
He had been pondering the dilemma and finally suggested, “I am tempted to let
him go, Glorfindel. He is old and wise enough to make his own decisions.”
Glorfindel glared at
Melpomaen. “You can not mean that!”
Elrond’s features
contorted after he had thought everything over. “I am sorry, Glorfindel, but I
agree with Melpomaen. Erestor is an adult now. We can not force him to return
to Imladris.”
Shattered, Glorfindel
collapsed onto a chair. “You can not be serious!” The mere thought of not
having Erestor close caused him heartache.
“Letting Erestor go is
hard on me too, Glorfindel,” Elrond answered firmly. “But there comes a time
when the parents have to step back and let the young find their own way.”
“You can not do this…you
can not!” Glorfindel practically begged Elrond to reconsider. “Erestor has
become a part of me!”
“Glorfindel, I love
Erestor as well. He *is* my son. I share your feelings, but I believe that
letting Erestor go is the right thing to do. When he is ready, he will return
to Imladris.”
“And what if he is never
ready?” Glorfindel felt crushed. Until that very moment, he hadn’t realized how
much he needed Erestor close!
~~~
Erestor needed a few days
to adjust to life on the road, but he quickly adapted. He found certain tracks
which lead him to believe Men were close and steered his mare in the opposite
direction. Occasionally he hunted small game and on other evenings he ate
berries and other fruit which he encountered along the way. With each passing
day, his confidence as a warrior grew, but with the increasing distance, he
also missed home and more specifically Glorfindel all the more.
After three weeks on the
road, Erestor began to wonder what was to become of him. He could keep himself
safe and alive, but there had to be more. He had to find a place to settle
down, preferably among Elves who didn’t know him, but where would he find such
a place?
There was another thing
that worried him. The last three days had changed, for his surroundings had
become barren, the earth dark and dry, and the sun was constantly hidden behind
large clouds. The grey skies added to his depressive state and Erestor was
tempted to turn around and head for the Golden Wood after all. But then he
entered a dark forest, one bereft of sun and the chirping of birds. It was
eerily quiet and when he did hear sounds, they sounded ominous to him. This was
a place that reeked of evil and despair and it made his skin crawl.
Erestor told his mare to
stop. He didn’t want to go any further and was about to turn around when he
heard a whisper of a sound coming from a branch situated above his head.
Looking up, he looked into a pair of startling blue eyes.
“Show yourself,”
he demanded. For one moment he had been afraid that Glorfindel had found him because
of the blue eyes, but these were a different kind of blue. Where Glorfindel’s
were dark and twinkling with mirth, these were of the lightest blue and filled
with alertness.
“You heard me. That is
amazing.”
Erestor arched an eyebrow.
He had adopted that quirk after seeing the effect it had on others when Elrond did
the same. “Show yourself and tell me your name.” His right hand rested on the
hilt of his sword. He was ready to defend himself.
A fair-haired Elf lowered
himself out of the tree and came to stand in front of Erestor’s mare. The
stranger was dressed in greens and browns and those colors camouflaged him
perfectly.
“I am Legolas,” the flaxen
Elf said and cocked his head. His gaze took in Erestor’s form and reached
several conclusions. First, this wasn’t a Mirkwood Elf. Second, this Elf was
about his age, and third, this raven-haired Elf didn’t trust him, what with the
fingers curled tightly around the hilt of his sword. “I am not the enemy.”
“Legolas,” Erestor repeated
the name. “I know who you are.”
Legolas didn’t seem
impressed. His gaze remained watchful. “Then you have the advantage. I told you
my name, now tell me yours.” It had been coincidence that he had happened upon
the intruder. He had been hunting for spiders, tracking down their webs and
killing their offspring before they could grow up and target any Elves. Coming
upon this stranger had piqued his curiosity and he had followed the dark-haired
Elf for about an hour until the stranger had noticed him.
“You are Thranduil’s son,”
Erestor answered in an attempt to show off his knowledge. During the many
lessons Elrond and Melpomaen had taught him, they had also informed him about
the situation in the
“Your name,” Legolas said
determinedly.
Realizing it would be best
to play along, Erestor provided Legolas with his name. “I am Erestor and I hail
from Imladris.”
“An
Imladris Elf? Did you get lost?
This is the
“I heard about the
Mirkwood spiders if you are referring to those,” Erestor replied. “And as you
can see, I am armed.”
“But you have no
experience fighting them.” Legolas felt amused by now. Erestor obviously felt
confident that he could take on a spider! By Elbereth! This Elf still had a lot
to learn! “I suggest you turn your horse around and return to Imladris. This is
no place for Elves like you.” He added that last bit on purpose to see if he
could annoy Erestor.
“Elves like me? What does
that mean?” Contrary to Legolas, Erestor was *not* amused. Who did Legolas
think he was, an Elfling? “I can hold my own against any enemy!”
“Lower your voice!”
Legolas hissed. “You are drawing attention to us and I would rather not take on
any spiders while I have to watch your back as well!”
Erestor glared at Legolas.
“I will prove my worth! Challenge me!”
They stared at each other:
two Elves who had just reached their majority and both eager to prove their
worth to the other.
“Not here. Not now,”
Legolas decided. He listened closely and caught a familiar sound. “A group of
spiders is coming our way. We should leave before they are upon us.”
“We can take them on!”
Erestor felt indignant that Legolas wanted to run.
In a softer and more
understanding voice Legolas said, “You do not know what you are about to face.
Let us call for a truce and head for safer grounds.”
“Where do we suggest we
go?” In spite of his bravado, Erestor was relieved that he didn’t have to face
those huge spiders just yet. So he had ended up in Mirkwood! He hadn’t realized
he had been traveling in that direction.
“Follow me,” Legolas
instructed. “Dismount first and lead your horse.” Seated high upon his horse,
Erestor would continue to draw attention. “You need to blend in.”
Understanding the logic to
the tactic, Erestor dismounted and followed Legolas deeper into the woods.
~~~
Erestor understood the
need to move silently and stealthily and refrained from talking. Legolas guided
him through the darker parts of the forest and he had to reassure his mare
several times since she was growing more and more nervous.
“I will take you into
safety. My father will want to talk to you. He does not like it when intruders
enter the forest.” Legolas was curious. The
“I heard many tales about
Thranduil,” Erestor whispered. “What is he really like?” He raised an eyebrow
in surprise when Legolas came to a stop. There was nothing in front of them
except rock, covered by moss. To his surprise, he saw Legolas reach forward and
a moment later, a door opened. “That is ingenious!”
Legolas allowed for a
smile to break through. “My father had these entrances made. When the spiders
attack, you need to flee quickly.” Legolas stepped inside and then looked at
Erestor from over his shoulder. “Follow me and you will find out what my father
is like first hand.”
Erestor led his mare
inside and was stunned to see that he stood in a large corridor which had been
carved into the rock. Although he admired the Mirkwood Elves for being so
resourceful, he also felt apprehensive. He was an Elf and, like most Elves, he
preferred open spaces and the sky above his head, not rock.
Seeing the uneasy
expression on Erestor’s face, Legolas said, “I grew up in these caves and I
have become used to living underground, but I understand that it makes you
nervous.” Legolas began to walk and looked over his shoulder to make certain
that Erestor followed.
“Do all Mirkwood Elves
live underground?” Erestor asked, feeling curious in spite of the confining
space he was in.
“Aye, we do. It is the
only place where we are safe from the spiders. Theoretically speaking one could
live on the surface, but you would have to constantly be alert. You could not
let your guard down for one moment.”
Erestor sensed the
presence of more Elves and the next moment also saw them. Like Legolas, they
were dressed in greens and browns, likely their hunter’s garb. All were armed
heavily and their hair had been braided away from their faces. For some absurd
reason, Erestor had expected all Mirkwood Elves to sport Legolas’ fair hair,
but most of the Elves had dark hair. One of them offered to take care of his
mare and Erestor nodded his permission.
“Come with me,” Legolas ordered.
“My father has undoubtedly learned that you are here and he will want to talk
to you.” Secretly, Legolas hoped he would learn more about Erestor.
~~~
Thranduil was *not*
pleased on learning that Legolas had brought an Imladris Elf home with him. But
then again, Legolas was the kind of Elf who would not turn someone in need
away. His son was much too good-hearted and Thranduil chided himself for
raising Legolas that way. He should have been stricter with his heir, but
Legolas’ gentle disposition and the fact that Thranduil cared deeply for his
son had made a strict upbringing impossible. The truth was that Thranduil had
spoiled his only son, especially after his wife had died. Legolas’ mother had
fallen prey to one of the spiders and Thranduil had arrived too late to save
her. She had died before his eyes.
“Adar? I brought a guest.” Legolas knew that his father
was of two minds about giving hospitality to an Elf who hailed from Imladris,
but he also knew that his father was too honorable an Elf to turn Erestor away.
Erestor felt awed when he
entered the main Hall which Thranduil used as his study. Elrond had once told
him about the great Dwarven cities located underground and had blinked back
then as he had wondered how such a structure was possible without caving in.
Now he saw it with his very eyes and, although he still disliked being
underground, there were so many wonders to behold that he no longer felt
uncomfortable. And on top of all that, he was going to meet Thranduil! Elrond
had always spoken with great respect of the Mirkwood King, but Erestor had
heard the bitter undertone whenever the
“Aye, the sentries told me
that you did not return alone.” Thranduil, who had been standing with his back
to the entrance, turned around to study their ‘guest’.
Erestor couldn’t help
sucking in his breath. Thranduil’s emerald eyes seemed to pierce his very soul
and he felt naked in front of the elder Elf. For one moment he thought he felt
Thranduil touch his mind, but then shook off that notion. No Elf would be
*that* impolite during a first meeting!
“So tell me, what brings
you to the
Erestor coughed in order
to cover up his nervousness. Thranduil was a truly impressive Elf: tall,
golden-haired, emerald-eyed, and well-muscled, he resembled Glorfindel in many
ways. Only the eyes served to remind him that this was Thranduil. “Sire, I
apologize for trespassing. The truth is that I became lost and did not realize
I had set foot upon your lands.” Remembering the lessons Elrond and Melpomaen
had taught him, he bowed to show his respect. “I am Erestor and humbly request
your hospitality.”
“It is given,” Thranduil
said. Like Legolas, he also felt curious. Erestor’s mind possessed a
fascinating texture and, in time, he planned to find out how Erestor exactly
had gotten ‘lost’ in the
“I would be honored to
share your son’s rooms,” Erestor replied diplomatically. He was relieved that
everything had gone so smoothly and that he had found a temporary home. The
~~~
“Your father seems to be
kind and understanding.” Erestor had followed Legolas to his room and now
looked about. There was no luxury there, just a chair, desk, some shelves, and
a bed, which would hold two Elves, if they squeezed together.
Legolas leaned against the
wall and studied Erestor. It surprised him a bit that his father had so readily
accepted Erestor’s presence. He had felt Thranduil reach out to probe Erestor’s
mind, but contrary to his father, he hadn’t seen any images in Erestor’s mind.
“I love my father. It is a pity that so many things burden him.”
Erestor was intelligent
enough not to question Legolas about those ‘things’. That would be
inconsiderate since he was only a guest. “You have lived here your entire
life?” he asked in an effort to make conversation.
“The first years of my
life I lived with my father of course. I was too little to have my own room. I
moved in here once I was old enough to take care of myself.” Erestor’s gaze
focused on the bump that showed on Legolas’ bed and couldn’t help wondering
what was hidden beneath the blanket. Legolas followed the gaze, sat down on the
bed, and pushed down the covers, revealing a black cat. Her large, yellow eyes
immediately focused on Erestor. “There are a few cats underground. They are an
easy prey for the spiders and I always allow her to seek refuge here.” It was
also nice to have a companion so deep under the ground. His father wasn’t
always available to keep him company and, in this way, he wasn’t that alone.
“I like animals – cats,”
Erestor said as he advanced on the bed. He sat down on the other side of the
bed and patted her head. She purred and pushed her head against the palm of his
hand.
“She likes you,” Legolas
whispered, surprised. She didn’t like strangers and, most of the time, only
Legolas was allowed to pet her.
“She has good taste,”
Erestor said, opting for joking. To his delight, Legolas chuckled.
“Maybe.” Legolas picked her up and put her on the floor.
“Off with you. Go search for food.” She was also handy in taking care of any
rats or mice that tried to invade the caves.
“Legolas, I hope you do
not think me forward, but…are we to share this bed?” It was best to discuss the
matter now, he decided.
Legolas grinned. “Do you
have a problem with sharing a bed with me or would you rather like to know me
better first?”
For one long moment,
Erestor felt flabbergasted, but then laughed. It seemed Legolas shared his
sense of humor, which came as a pleasant surprise. “It looks like I will have
all the time in the world to know you better.”
“Very
true.” Their bantering amused
Legolas, who now felt happy that he had brought Erestor to the caves with him.
There were hardly any Elves his own age down there. Letting down his guard, he
asked, “Will you tell me about Imladris? I always envisioned going there one
day and would like to know what it is like. I hear only rumors, but you have
actually been there.”
Erestor sat cross-legged
on the bed and smiled at Legolas. He liked the other Elf, who reminded him a
bit of himself. “Of course I will. And will you tell me all I need to know
about life in the
And so a pact was formed
between the heir of the
~~~
Legolas’ blue eyes were
sparkling by the time Erestor finished giving a general description of the Last
Homely House. Erestor could easily tell that Legolas would love to visit
Imladris one day and said, “If you ever find the chance to do so take it. I am
certain Elrond will welcome you with open arms.”
Legolas sighed deeply.
“There is little chance of that ever happening. My father wishes for me to stay
close.”
“Why is that?” Erestor
studied Legolas, who had sometime during his tale stretched out on his side
with his arm propped beneath his head. Legolas’ eyes possessed a dreamy
expression and Erestor wondered if his description had been enough to help
Legolas form a mental image of Imladris in his head.
Legolas shrugged and his
head bobbed. “I understand my father. The
Feeling a bit more
confident once Legolas had warmed up to him, Erestor asked, “Are you an only
child?” He wondered if he was going to meet Legolas’ mother as well.
Legolas nodded. “Aye, I am
an only child. My father told me they had wanted more children but my mother
passed away three decades ago. My father has not taken a new mate since. We
still mourn her death.”
“I am sorry I asked. I did
not want to bring back painful memories,” Erestor said quickly.
Legolas’ expression grew
full of sadness and longing. “My father loved her and so did I. She is sorely
missed.”
Erestor moistened his lips
delicately and then offered, “I do not remember my parents. I do not know what
they looked like, what they were like, or what their names were.”
Legolas focused on Erestor.
“You do not? How can that be?”
“I was separated from them
when I was a baby. I do not know if they died or had to flee and left me
behind.” Erestor hadn’t spoken about his parents for a very long time and
thinking of them now caused him emotional pain. “But then Lord Elrond took me
in. I was fortunate that he adopted me. I will always think of him as my
father.” He didn’t dare to think of Glorfindel at the moment. It would be too
painful.
“And now you left your
family. I do not wish to pry, but I wonder why you chose to leave Imladris.”
Legolas realized he shouldn’t have asked that yet as Erestor’s expression
became guarded and his lips tightened to a narrow line. “Now it is my turn to
apologize. I was insensitive.”
“Maybe I will tell you –
in time.” Erestor lowered his gaze. It was easy to talk to Legolas...much too
easy and it would land him in trouble if he wasn’t careful.
“Enough talk for tonight.”
Legolas stood and began to undress. “We should rest for the next few hours. It
will be morning before you know it and then I will show you the rest of the
Erestor was glad that
Legolas had changed the subject. However, he kept his gaze lowered, not wanting
to infringe on the disrobing Elf’s privacy. He had slept in close quarters
before with Glorfindel, Elrond, and even the twins at times, but Legolas was a
stranger and that made the situation different.
Legolas was diplomatic
enough to keep his leggings on. “Are you going to sleep in all your clothes?”
Erestor felt a bit
embarrassed as his face reddened slightly. He peeked at Legolas and decided to
follow the other Elf’s example. He stripped down to his leggings and then stood
next to the bed, wondering how they would fit without actually touching.
Legolas wasn’t as bothered
by the situation as Erestor was and stretched out on his side. “I do not bite,”
he said teasingly. He hoped that a little humor would break the ice again. He
wanted Erestor to feel comfortable.
“Neither do I,” Erestor whispered, still feeling nervous. He lay down on
his side as well, but with his back turned to Legolas. He felt ‘safer’ that
way. But the bed wasn’t that large and some touching couldn’t be avoided no
matter how hard Erestor tried to avoid contact.
“If you move further away
from me, you will fall off the bed,” Legolas commented, meaning well.
“I am not used to sharing
a bed with an Elf I hardly know,” Erestor admitted, blushing. He was grateful
that Legolas couldn’t see his face redden further.
Legolas smiled. “You will become
used to it. We do not have enough space down here to award rooms to everyone.
You might be sharing with me for a longer period of time.”
“It is not you,” Erestor
clarified and closed his eyes in an attempt to lock out his discomfort. He
didn’t know why, but he desperately wanted to confide in Legolas and open his
heart to him, but he also knew it was too early for that. They hardly knew each
other and he couldn’t unburden himself emotionally to Legolas. “It is the whole
situation – being away from home for the first time.”
Sensing some of Erestor’s
distress, Legolas took a risk by sliding closer to Erestor and wrapped an arm
around the dark-haired Elf’s waist. It was an incredibly intimate gesture for
him to bestow on a stranger and he wouldn’t normally do such a thing, but he
felt deeply for Erestor, who, shrouded in mystery, also carried a measure of
despair with him. The teasing banter hadn’t fooled him. “You are among friends.
You can rest your weary head and sleep.”
Erestor had tensed when he
had first felt Legolas’ arm come around him. His first thought had been to
shrug it off, but then he accepted it. The truth was that he yearned for some
contact after all the weeks of being on his own. “Thank you.”
Legolas smiled a sad
smile. “Maybe one day, you will be offering me your comfort. We do not know
what our future holds, the pain, the sorrow, but also the joys and the
pleasures. Do not forget that good things will happen as well. You might not
believe that now, because you are hurting – and do not ask me how I know you
are hurting, I just know.” He hoped he wasn’t coming on too strong...he didn’t
want that.
But Erestor understood
Legolas’ sincere intentions and took no offense to them. If anything he felt
honored that this Elf cared enough for him to comfort him. It took Erestor a
long time to fall asleep, but Legolas’ closeness helped soothe him and, in the
end, he dozed off. Legolas however remained awake, pondering Erestor’s
situation.
~~~
The next morning, Erestor
was alone in bed when he awoke. Well, not quite alone. The black cat was back
and had curled up against his chest. At first Erestor didn’t know where he was,
but when he saw the cat and the stone walls he remembered that he was staying
in Legolas’ room. He patted the cat and then sat upright to scan his
surroundings. Legolas stood in the doorway and was about to enter the room
again.
“Good morning,” Legolas
said. He placed the clothes which had been draped over his arm onto the chair
and then advanced on the bed. “You slept well. You did not wake during the
night.” He had watched Erestor’s sleep for most of the night. He had used his
time well and had devised a plan to familiarize Erestor with life in Mirkwood.
“Aye, I did.” That he had
slept well surprised him, but Erestor decided that it had much to do with
Legolas’ comforting presence the other night. Since he was awake, he wondered
what was expected of him.
“I brought you new
clothes. You need to blend in when you venture outside. You will stand out in
the colors you are wearing now. I suggest you wash your face first,” Legolas suggested
as he pointed at a bowl filled with water. “And then change into these.”
“And then what?” Erestor
did as he was told and washed his face. Next, he slipped into the green and
brown garb and put on his boots.
“And now you let me braid
your hair.” Erestor’s hair had become a tangled mess since he hadn’t looked
after it on the road. “Sit down.” Legolas took hold of the brush and several
leather bands. Once Erestor had seated himself Legolas began to brush the hair
and removed the knots from the raven strands. “We wear it braided away from the
face so it will not hinder us when we have to fight.” Legolas placed the brush
aside and began to braid one section of the hair. He then fastened the braid
with a leather band and began to work on the remaining hair. “Once I have
finished, we will eat breakfast in the kitchen and then we will join today’s
patrol. Did you not want to learn more about life in Mirkwood and how to
survive in the
Erestor was thrilled that
Legolas was taking him seriously. “Aye, I do! I want to learn more about the
“You will,” Legolas answered
as he smiled warmly. Erestor’s enthusiasm was infectious. “I will teach you how
to read the spider’s tracks and how to take them out.”
Erestor looked at his
reflection in the small mirror that stood upon the table. The outfit and
different hair style had changed him. He didn’t just look like a changed Elf,
but he felt different as well.
“Legolas?” Erestor rose from the chair and stood in front of
the fair-haired Elf. He looked into azure eyes which reminded him painfully of
Glorfindel’s blue ones. “Thank you for taking me in and accepting me.”
Legolas smiled warmly. “It
helps that my father welcomed you to the
Erestor returned the
smile. “And now show me a spider.”
~~~
Erestor didn’t see a
spider right away. Legolas first showed him to the kitchen, where they ate
porridge enriched with honey. They also found Thranduil sitting at the kitchen
table eating bread and dried meats. Erestor was surprised to see the ‘King’ eating
in the kitchen. From Elrond’s tales he had gathered that Thranduil felt
superior and acted arrogant. That however was clearly not the case.
“Legolas… Erestor…”
Thranduil said in-between bites and gestured for them to sit down opposite him.
Erestor was also surprised
to find that Thranduil wore similar clothes as what he was wearing. Nothing
fancy, no rich materials. The golden hair had also been braided back and was
held in place by brown leather bands. While spooning the porridge into his
mouth, Erestor listened to the conversation taking place between father and
son.
“Do you think it is wise
to take Erestor out on patrol with you, Legolas?” Thranduil was concerned, and
not just for his guest’s safety, but for his son’s as well. He knew what it was
like to have to watch an inexperienced Elf’s back. The spiders were treacherous
and an inexperienced Elf could easily fall prey to them.
Legolas nodded his head. “The
last patrol did not sight any spiders. They have been inactive lately.”
Thranduil looked Erestor
in the eye. “I mean no disrespect, Erestor, but you lack experience in handling
spiders.”
“I understand sire and I
will use the utmost caution when I am out there. I also possess skill with a
bow and know how to use my knives, if I am allowed to fetch them from my
saddlebags? I will not expose any member of the patrol to danger.” Erestor was
deadly serious.
In the end, Thranduil
nodded. “Be careful when you are out there.” He had no desire to have to
explain to Elrond half-Elven why his adopted son had died in the
But Legolas shook his head
determinedly. “We can not both join the patrol. One of us has to remain here
and rule the
Thranduil laughed and the
bitterness in that laugh caused Erestor to look up from eating his porridge. “The
Erestor offered Thranduil
a reassuring smile. “No offense taken.”
Thranduil rose to his feet
and headed for the doorway, but not before looking at Erestor and saying,
“Fetch your knives, though I pray you do not have to use them.” Thranduil then
exited the kitchen, leaving the two younger Elves alone.
“My father has been
changing of late. I believe it is due to the influence of the shadow that
crawls deeper into the heart of our lands.” Legolas wished his father had a
mate to share the burden with. He was only Thranduil’s son and in his father’s
eyes still an Elfling. He could never really share his father’s burden.
“I understand,” Erestor
answered quickly. “I felt it before you revealed yourself to me. I sensed evil.
It was all around me and I could not escape it.”
“You sensed it? Good. That
will help you stay alert and focused when we are out there.” Legolas rose from
the chair and signaled for Erestor to do the same. “You wanted to see the heart
of Mirkwood and experience her dangers. Come with me and I will show you.”
Feeling oddly excited,
Erestor followed Legolas out of the kitchen. They first visited the section
where they kept Erestor’s mare and Erestor retrieved his trusted knives. He had
never excelled at sword play, but the knives and the bow were weapons which he
had mastered perfectly.
“Ready?” Legolas inquired,
also equipped with knives, a quiver, and his trusted bow.
“I am ready. Show me.”
~~~
Erestor and Legolas joined
a group of ten other Elves, all heavily armed and ready to do battle should
they encounter spiders.
Erestor was thrilled that
Legolas was allowing him to be a part of this. Back in Imladris, he had always
been kept away from potentially dangerous situations. He understood why. Due to
his painful past, Elrond and Glorfindel had been extremely cautious with him.
The twins had been allowed to go Orc hunting and patrolling, but not Erestor.
To some degree, Elrond and Glorfindel *had* treated him differently. And now he
finally had his chance to prove himself.
“Try to be as quiet as you
can. Do not speak, unless your life depends on it. We communicate by hand
signals. I will teach you how to use them. For now, just watch.”
And Erestor did just that.
He watched, listened closely, and adapted. They moved stealthily through the
wood without making any sounds. The hand signals the Mirkwood Elves used to
communicate weren’t that difficult to understand and he learned quickly how to
use them. They didn’t encounter any spiders and Erestor didn’t really mind
because, for the first time, he was part of a patrol. He felt like a warrior,
confident and capable.
Legolas noticed how
Erestor’s stance began to change. Confidence appeared in the dark eyes and it
amazed Legolas how quickly Erestor adjusted to life in the dangerous
surroundings. It appeared Erestor had the instincts and the talents he needed
to survive out there.
By the time the patrol
returned to the cave, evening had fallen. The patrol had been uneventful and
everyone was relieved because of that. They had all lost kin due to the
spider’s poison which could kill a grown Elf within the hour.
Once the two Elves had
returned to Legolas’ room, Erestor sat down on the bed. He was grinning broadly
and gave Legolas a grateful look. “That was quite the experience. You must
teach me all the hand signals!”
Legolas removed the
quiver, the holster that held his knives, and placed them along with his bow on
the table. He felt tired since he hadn’t rested the night before as well as
dirty. “I will, but first I am going to take a bath. Care to join me?”
“A
bath?” Erestor gave Legolas an
apologetic look. Considering where they were, deep underground, he hadn’t
thought the Mirkwood Elves had anything that resembled a bathroom. This room
certainly didn’t have an adjourning bathroom.
“We have
“I will join you. I can do
with some washing up as well.” Erestor placed his knives, quiver, and bow next
to Legolas’ and followed the fair-haired Elf out of the room. “Will you also
tell me more about the spiders and how to take them out? I want to be prepared
should we happen upon them.”
Legolas nodded
absentmindedly. Erestor’s enthusiasm would dwindle once he had faced his first
spider.
~~~
Erestor lowered himself
into the warm water and released a contented sigh. The hot pool covered a large
part of the cave they were in and there was ample space for everyone, even to
give Erestor and Legolas some privacy. He had quickly removed his clothes and
had then slid into the water, keeping the time of being naked and exposed to a
minimum. For long years he had felt insecure about his body, thinking that
certain scars which he had received during his childhood were still visible,
even if Elrond had assured him his skin had healed.
Accidentally, he looked up
and caught a glimpse of Legolas’ naked body. The Mirkwood Elf was lean, built
for endurance, and nicely proportioned where muscle tone was concerned. He had
strong shoulders, arms, a narrow waist, and long legs. Erestor instantly grew
flustered and averted his gaze, but it was too late. His body reacted to the
tempting sight Legolas presented.
He thought he would feel
relieved once Legolas was emerged in the water, but the other Elf had seated
himself close to him and Erestor was painfully aware of Legolas’ enticing
presence. It was only normal, he reasoned. He had reached his majority, but had
not yet had a chance to release his pent-up sexual need. If all had gone well,
Glorfindel would have instructed him in the art of making love, but Glorfindel
had rejected him, leaving him in a delicate predicament. His body yearned for
some kind of release, but wasn’t receiving it.
Legolas was, unbeknownst
to Erestor, in a similar situation. His father had given him the option to
choose a mate when he had come of age, but since there had been no Elf Legolas
had felt attracted to, he had not chosen a lover. But he *did* feel attracted
to Erestor and this was amazing considering the fact that they had just met.
Erestor hoped that the
steam rising from the warm water would explain his flustered state. He closed
his eyes, rested his head against the support, and tried to deny that he was
having these problems. But his body refused to cooperate and, to his horror, he
grew erect. The steam hid his erected state from view though and for that he
was grateful.
“Erestor? Can I ask you something personal?” Legolas had
turned his head and was studying Erestor’s face, which struck him as handsome.
When he had brushed and braided Erestor’s hair that morning, he had liked the
texture of the strands when they had slid through his fingers.
Erestor didn’t really
trust his voice, but tried to sound steady when he answered, “What would you
like to know?”
“When did you reach your
majority?”
Erestor felt relieved.
That was a question he had no problem with answering. “A few
months ago. And you?”
“Two years ago.” Legolas
grinned smugly. “That means I am older than you.” Erestor held his tongue. The
date of his birth was unknown and he couldn’t be really certain how old he was.
All he had was an estimate. Legolas grew bolder once he knew that Erestor had
reached his majority. He would never approach an Elfling. “Did you leave your
mate behind in Imladris?” He instantly noticed how the dark eyes clouded over
with sadness and longing. That had been the wrong question to ask and he cursed
himself privately for asking it.
Knowing that he was
wearing his emotions on his sleeve, Erestor opted for the truth. “The Elf I
chose to become my lover rejected me.”
Legolas sucked in his
breath. He hadn’t expected Erestor to explain himself to him! “He rejected
you?”
Erestor nodded once. “I
fell in love with the wrong Elf it seems. He told me to find someone closer to
my own age.”
Legolas blinked in
surprise. Since when did an age difference become a barrier? “And you left to
save him the embarrassment?”
“You understand,”
whispered Erestor unintentionally, the words escaping him. “I could not stay. I
would only further embarrass the two of us.” Although his arousal hadn’t died
yet, he didn’t feel that uncomfortable anymore. Legolas *really* understood! “And what about you?”
Legolas smiled
conspiratorially at Erestor first before answering. He would answer Erestor’s
question in a moment, but first he wanted to know something for certain. “Does
that mean you have not yet had a lover, Erestor?”
Erestor’s blush deepened.
“It is not very…nice… of you to ask me something that personal.”
“Nice?” Legolas laughed
bemused. “Erestor, I believe your upbringing and mine greatly differed. My
father taught me that there is no shame in discussing one’s need, even when
they are of a sexual nature. I surmise that was not the case with you?”
“We seldom talked about
such personal matters.” And until he had realized he had developed a crush on
Glorfindel, Erestor hadn’t even *wanted* to consider to be intimate with
anyone. Not after what he had experienced in his early childhood. *That* had
deeply affected him.
Legolas took pity on
Erestor and let him off the hook. “Erestor, I have not had a lover yet either,
so there is no need for you to be embarrassed.” He leaned in closer and
caressed a lock of Erestor’s raven hair, which felt soft between his
fingertips. “And I reached my majority two years ago.”
Erestor’s gaze became
trained on Legolas’ fingers which twined a strand of raven hair between them.
No one had ever done that before. All the feelings that swirled through him
confused and upset him. “Legolas, I do not think this is a wise thing to do.”
“Wise? What is wise, Erestor?” Legolas considered their
situation and then added, “Do not be afraid. I have no intention of bedding you
tonight, but would sharing a kiss be so wrong?”
“Legolas, we hardly knew
each other!” The speed with which Legolas was progressing made Erestor’s head
reel!
“Erestor, I have learned
one thing in my life: that life is fleeting. We might leave on patrol tomorrow
and not return. Do you understand that life in Mirkwood is different from life
in Imladris? We face death each day.” Legolas knew he was moving too fast for
Erestor and pulled back his hand. Well, he tried to pull it back.
Erestor grabbed hold of
Legolas’ wrist and stared into the other Elf’s eyes. “How would your father
react when he found out that we are attracted to one another? I have the
feeling that he knows everything that happens around here.”
“He has his informants,”
Legolas admitted. “But my father would not meddle. I can tell you that much.”
Erestor was tempted to
give in. His body had certain demands and since it was waking up, he realized
he couldn’t ignore them much longer. What should have happened a few months ago
with Glorfindel as his partner was now having repercussions. Contrary to
Legolas, Erestor hadn’t touched himself yet. “Your offer is tempting…so
tempting, but I should not give in.”
“Why
not?” Legolas kept his distance
once he knew that Erestor wasn’t as eager as he had hoped he was. “Is it
because of the Elf who rejected you?”
“Partly,” Erestor
admitted. “By the Grace of the Valar, it is scary how well you know me!”
“You are not that hard to
grasp,” Legolas replied with a smile. “You do not have to decide now, Erestor.
I realize that we just met and that you are plagued with doubt. But I know what
you are going through and advise you not to wait too long. Your body has
certain needs which should be met.”
“How do you deal with your
needs?” Erestor blinked. Had he really asked Legolas such a personal question?
“I touch myself, Erestor.
I bring myself to orgasm when the pressure becomes too much, but I would prefer
to feel a lover’s touch instead.” He knew he shouldn’t feel bemused when
Erestor grew flustered again, but the other Elf’s attitude to sex puzzled him.
“We should leave the pool now or we will turn into prunes. I will go first.”
Erestor swallowed
nervously when he realized that Legolas knew that he was erect. Why else would Legolas
offer to go first? Then he received his next shock because when Legolas emerged
from the water, he saw that Legolas was also sporting an erection. But contrary
to Erestor, Legolas wasn’t bothered by it.
Legolas dried his skin and
then slipped into a clean set of clothes that had been laid out for them. “Come
to bed when you are ready to go to sleep. I will pay my father a short visit
and then I will join you. I am tired as well.” Judging it wise to give Erestor
his privacy, he exited the cave and headed for his father’s rooms. Imladris’
Elves had the oddest ideas about sexuality...at least that was Legolas’ opinion
of the matter.
~~~~
Erestor stayed in the
water until his arousal had faded. He just didn’t possess Legolas’ confident
and carefree attitude where sexuality was concerned. Life in Mirkwood was very
different from life in Imladris. But then again, maybe it was just him who was
different. Had Elrond and Glorfindel raised him different because of his past
experience with the slave trader? Had they been afraid to touch the matter of
his sexuality?
The truth was that, even
if he still remembered what had happened to him in those early days, he was
used to handling them. But what he hadn’t learned to deal with was his
sexuality.
~~~
Thranduil could tell that
something occupied Legolas’ mind when his son sought him out in his rooms. He
had been reading some reports when Legolas entered, but had instantly put them
aside. His son always came first. “Something is on your mind, Legolas.”
Legolas seated himself on
his father’s desk and let his feet dangle above the floor. Sometimes he loved
feeling like an Elfling again. He could always come to his father when
something troubled him and Thranduil always listened to him before advising
him. Due to his father’s love and tender care he had grown into a confident
young Elf. “It is Erestor.”
“The
Imladris Elf.” Thranduil leaned
back in his chair and studied Legolas’ face. His son wasn’t exactly troubled...there
was something else going on. “Share your thoughts with me.” He could touch his
son’s mind and find out that way but he would rather not. Then he would be
trespassing.
“I feel attracted to him
and I believe the feeling is mutual.” Legolas preferred being direct. There was
no reason for him to fear his father’s reaction to this news. Thranduil had
repeatedly urged him to take a lover.
Thranduil needed a moment
to fully understand what Legolas had just told him. “You feel attracted to
him?”
“But his view regarding
sexuality confuses me, Adar. He acts likes it is something to be ashamed of,
not something natural that happens when we are ready like you taught me.”
Images that he had seen in
Erestor’s mind returned to Thranduil and he took his time formulating an
answer. “Legolas, you hardly know Erestor.”
“True, but there is
something about him that appeals to me and you always urged me to find a
lover.” Legolas cocked his head and his fair hair tumbled in front of his face.
“I told Erestor you would not meddle if we decided to become lovers.”
Thranduil’s eyes widened
slightly. “You are actually considering becoming lovers?”
Legolas smiled winningly
at his father. “I am sorry that I sprang this upon you, but you always taught
me to be honest.”
“Using
my own teachings against me!”
Thranduil couldn’t help but laugh. He then sobered and said, “Legolas, I will
not meddle if you decide to take him as your lover, but I urge you to carefully
consider if Erestor is the right Elf for you.”
“Adar! Erestor overreacted and now you are doing the
same! I am not going to bed him tonight!” Legolas chuckled bemused.
“May I offer you some
fatherly advice?”
“Always,
Adar.” Legolas leaned in closer
and smiled at his father.
“You mentioned that
Erestor has ‘strange’ ideas regarding his sexuality. May I suggest you find out
more about those before you bed him?”
“Of
course!” Legolas placed a
chaste kiss on his father’s brow. “Thank you for understanding and allowing
this. I did not really think you would oppose.” But he hadn’t been certain. After
all, Erestor hailed from Imladris and was Elrond’s adopted son.
“How am I going to explain
this to the half-Elf when the time comes?” Thranduil sighed deeply.
“I am sure you will find a
way!” Legolas hopped off the desk and walked toward the doorway. “I can always
blame it on you, you know. You told us to share a bed.” Legolas quickly closed
the door behind him, not giving his father a chance to react.
“Brat,” Thranduil
whispered fondly once Legolas was gone. “But I still love you, Legolas.”
~~~
Erestor had already gone
to bed when Legolas arrived in his rooms, but the raven-haired Elf was not
asleep yet. The deep brown eyes immediately fastened on him and Legolas sat
down on the side of the bed. Erestor had pulled up the covers, but some bare
chest still showed.
“What did your father
say?” Erestor *knew* what Legolas had discussed with Thranduil. He made himself
didn’t deny that.
“He gave us his blessing
if you want to know,” Legolas replied with a smile. “Do you mind me joining you
in bed?”
Erestor felt nervous, but
then shook his head. “I do not mind.” He was venturing onto new territory and
didn’t really know what to do.
Legolas stretched out on
his side, face to face with Erestor and rested a hand on the other Elf’s hip.
He kept the touch decent though, keeping his hand above the blanket. “You feel
it too, do you not?”
Erestor nodded. “I do and
I do not know what to do about it. You see, I always thought my first time
would be with…that certain Elf.”
Legolas understood. “You
still love him, do you not?”
Erestor bit his bottom
lip. “I feel connected to him in a special way. Those feelings differ from what
I feel for you. Does that make me a bad Elf for leading you on?”
Legolas inched closer
until he could rest his brow against Erestor’s. “Erestor, making love is
something natural, something that should be savored. We are young. No one
expects us to bind. We are allowed to explore until we announce the identity of
the Elf we want to spend the rest of our lives with. Do not worry that much
about the future. Live in the here and now.”
Legolas’ views differed so
greatly from his that Erestor at times had trouble following them. “Legolas? I do not know what to do. All I know is that I do
not want to go all the way yet.”
Legolas nodded. “I have no
intention of taking this all the way.” He gently rubbed Erestor’s skin through
the fabric of the blanket. “But I would like to taste your lips, if you would
allow it.”
Legolas’ request only
increased Erestor’s nervousness and he had to make a painful admission. “I have
never been kissed before…not in that way.” He was tempted to lower his gaze,
but something in Legolas’ gaze reassured him and his anxiety began to fade a
bit.
“Never? That is a shame.” Legolas smiled and then leaned
in closer. “Prepare to receive your first kiss, Erestor.” The way Erestor
trembled against him told Legolas much. He had to go slow with Erestor, very
slow. Erestor closed his eyes the moment Legolas’ lips touched his. The kiss
was gentle, non-invasive and Erestor finally had his first taste of what
kissing was like.
Legolas slid his hand up
Erestor’s back and cupped the back of the other Elf’s neck. Erestor eagerly
accepted his lead and Legolas realized what a huge amount of trust Erestor was putting
in him. “Relax,” he whispered against Erestor’s lips. Legolas’ fingers moved
through Erestor’s raven mane and that particular caress seemed to relax
Erestor, so Legolas kept it up during the next kiss which he bestowed upon
Erestor’s lips.
Erestor savored his first
kisses, which were gentle, just as he had hoped. The kisses told him that he
had chosen the right Elf to initiate him into the ways of love. For one brief
moment, he regretted that it wasn’t Glorfindel kissing him, but then
reprimanded himself for thinking something like that. Legolas didn’t deserve
that.
Legolas released Erestor’s
lips and smiled at Erestor. Erestor opened his eyes again and the expression in
them was dreamy. “Did you like your first kisses, Erestor?”
“I did,” Erestor whispered
against Legolas’ lips. Legolas was an Elf he could fall in love with...his
instincts told him that. But what about Glorfindel?
/Glorfindel does not want me. He rejected me. He even told me to find an Elf my
own age!/ Glorfindel had no reason to be angry with
him should they ever meet again!
“You are thinking about
him,” Legolas said pensively. “Erestor, I like you and I am falling in love
with you, but I will not deepen this relationship if you allow this Elf to
stand between us. Then we are doomed to fail.”
Erestor nodded. “I know
that, but it is hard. I always hoped that Glorfindel…” His eyes widened as he
realized that he had let Glorfindel’s name slip.
“Glorfindel? The legendary Glorfindel?”
Legolas remained pensive. “I have impressive competition!” He grew silent then,
allowing Erestor to make up his mind. “This is your decision, Erestor. Yours alone.”
Erestor nodded again. “I
want this,” he admitted. “I want this… I want you… I want what you are
offering. I want to explore this whole new world, but saying goodbye to
Glorfindel means I have given up on ever winning his love.”
“He rejected you, did he
not? Told you to find an Elf your own age?” Legolas reminded him. It was
important that Erestor made his decision now.
And Erestor realized that
as well. “He did.” Erestor released a long sigh. “You are right. He does not
want me and you do.” When he looked into Legolas’ eyes next, he had made up his
mind. “I choose you.” He would banish Glorfindel from his thoughts. Glorfindel
would not ruin this chance he had at happiness. “I choose you, Legolas.”
Legolas searched Erestor’s
eyes for a long time and in the end, he was convinced that Erestor meant it.
“In that case, let me kiss you again.”
This time, Erestor
surrendered himself to the kiss, accepted everything Legolas was giving him
through that kiss, and banished Glorfindel from his thoughts!
~~~
Waking up in Legolas’ arms
was a pleasant sensation, one that made Erestor feel all warm inside. With
Glorfindel…Erestor stopped that line of thought immediately. Glorfindel had
rejected him and was no longer a part of his life...a life that he now led in
Mirkwood with Legolas at his side.
Erestor raised a hand and
caressed Legolas’ slightly swollen lips. Their kisses had become more
passionate as the night had progressed and Erestor’s lips were similarly
bruised. When they visited with Thranduil later, the elder Elf would
immediately know what had happened.
“You look breathtaking,”
Erestor whispered, giving voice to the wonder which he felt when he looked at
Legolas’ face. The eyes were still hooded with sleep and dreams and the fair
hair caressed his fingertips as Erestor moved them through the mane.
“Thank you,” Legolas mumbled
unexpectedly, showing that he was already awake. The eyes lost their misty
expression and focused on Erestor’s face. Legolas read emotion in those eyes:
sincere affection, but there was also a haunted look in them. It would take a
little while before Glorfindel’s memory would stop haunting Erestor. Legolas
was no fool; he knew that Erestor needed time and loving care. That rejection
must have greatly hurt Erestor. “Are you ready to face the day, Erestor?”
Legolas asked as he smiled brilliantly. Like Erestor, he savored the fact of
not waking up alone.
“What will the day bring
us?” Erestor wasn’t letting go yet and tightened his embrace on the Mirkwood
Elf. Resting in each other’s arms, neither one of them wanted to rise.
“We will spar. I will
teach you our hand signals and how to take out a spider. We will spend some
time with my father and question the returning patrol on their findings.
Tomorrow, when you know how to deal with a spider, we will lead another patrol.
Does that answer your question?”
Erestor nodded his head
and when he did, their brows touched. “I will do my utmost to be the best lover
you could possibly wish for, Legolas.”
Legolas shook his head,
rubbing his brow against Erestor’s. “Do not work too much on pleasing me,
Erestor. I like what I have seen so far.”
Erestor smiled at Legolas.
In that case, he would just be himself.
~~~
During their sparring
match, they found out that they were quite evenly matched. It was hard for
either one of them to gain the upper hand since both Elves had been trained
extremely well. Erestor’s defenses were better than Legolas’, but the Mirkwood
Elf excelled in attack tactics. It was a stalemate. Thranduil realized that as
well as he watched them.
He’d had reservations when
Legolas had first told him that he wanted to take Erestor as his lover. Not
because of the images he had seen in Erestor’s head of the time Erestor had
spent in slavery, but because Erestor hailed from Imladris. He already had
enough problems with Imladris as it was.
But as he watched them
spar, his admiration for Erestor increased. The young Elf fought cunningly and
would be capable of standing his ground against any attacking spider. It was
obvious that Erestor fit in with the rest of the Mirkwood Elves and they had
already taken a liking to him. It was also obvious that Legolas and Erestor was
an excellent match and for that, he should feel grateful. There were only a few
Elves close to Legolas’ age in Mirkwood, but none of them had ever roused
Legolas’ interest. But this dark-haired Imladris Elf had.
He would accept Erestor
into their midst and he hoped that the two Elves would be happy.
~~~
“And that is how you take
out a spider the fastest way. Aim between their eyes.” Legolas had drawn the
image of a spider onto paper and had marked the creature’s weak spots. “If you
face one of them, you can try to take it out. If you face a pack, run. Use one
of the escape doors which I showed you when you first came here.”
Legolas had taken great
care to supply Erestor with all the details. Once Erestor became a regular
patrol member, he would face spiders and the other members would depend on him
to watch their backs.
“The spiders are fast and
wicked. Just like we know their weak spots, they know ours. They are fast on
their legs and they will try to outrun you.” Legolas tried to install the
proper amount of respect in Erestor so that when the other Elf met a spider, he
would proceed with caution.
“I understand. I will not
underestimate them.” Erestor gave Legolas an inquiring look. He had a question
that addressed a different subject. “How do you tell how much time has passed
by living underground?” He had no idea if it was morning,
Legolas pointed at a ray
of sunshine that showed on the opposite wall. “See the little markings carved
into the stone? It is just past
Another ingenious system
and again Erestor was impressed. “You adapted extremely well to having to live
underground.”
“My father invented the
system. Just like you, he needed to tell how much time had passed. It works
during the day when the sun shines. During the night, we still have to guess.”
Legolas offered Erestor his hand and pulled the dark-haired Elf to his feet.
Erestor’s ability to adapt impressed him in turn. Erestor had done well in
adopting Mirkwood’s ways as his own and had made him proud.
~~~
Thranduil had waited to
eat his
“Have you ever considered
leaving and settling down somewhere else?” The moment the question left
Erestor’s lips, he realized Thranduil might think of it as an inconsiderate one
and wanted to apologize, but then Thranduil raised a hand to silence him.
“I am no fool, Erestor. I
did, but there is no place for us to go.” Thranduil had lost his appetite and
nursed his tea instead.
“Why not head for the
Golden Wood or Imladris?” Since Thranduil seemed willing to discuss this,
Erestor grew bolder.
“Because there are ill
feelings between us stemming from the
“What *did* happen during
that battle? Elrond always avoided answering that question.” Erestor *was*
curious and hoped that Thranduil would explain matters to him. He caught a look
from Legolas which could have been interpreted as a warning, but Erestor
shrugged his shoulders helplessly. The warning came too late since he had
already asked.
Thranduil swallowed hard.
He had told Legolas once because he thought his heir needed to know why the
three rulers were at odds which each other and he had hoped he would never have
to tell it a second time. “I am surprised Elrond did not tell you.”
“He implied that Oropher’s
death was at the base of the quarrel. That was all he wanted to say about the
matter.” Erestor was surprised to find Legolas reach for his hand beneath the
table and curled around his hand.
Thranduil sighed. It
seemed he had to tell the tale again. “My father’s death was the result of
misunderstanding and miscommunication.” Thranduil sipped his tea and then
continued. “My father knew he had to join Ereinion’s forces, but he did so
reluctantly. Not because he did not trust Ereinion’s ability to lead them, but
because he knew a great number of his subjects would never return to their
wives and children.”
Thranduil sipped again;
his throat had gone painfully dry all of a sudden. “My father wanted to take
the Evil One by surprise and as quickly as possible. Ereinion did not share
that opinion. He wanted to place his troops strategically, bide his time, and
attack when he felt the time was right. My father grew impatient and was under
the impression that they were giving the Evil One too much time to prepare for
battle.” Erestor listened closely. Elrond had never wanted to tell him what had
happened.
“In the end, my father
managed to convince Ereinion that an early attack would be to their advantage
and the High-King gave my father permission to attack. Ereinion made a fatal
mistake though: he did not tell Elrond about his decision. So when my father
attacked and called for reinforcements, Elrond was not prepared to send his men
into battle. It took Ereinion’s mediation for Elrond to understand that my
father was acting on the High-King’s order and, when help came, it was too
late. My father had already fallen in battle and so had the majority of his
men.”
Erestor felt deeply for
Thranduil, who was clearly fighting to control his emotions so he would be able
to end his tale. “Celeborn, leading another fraction of the High-King’s army,
had moved forward to support my father’s attack, but he too arrived too late.
The meeting that followed the next day was not pretty. I know so first hand
since I was there to represent my people. I was in shock that day. I had lost
my father and many of the Elves who had helped raise me and had become friends
over the years. I did not say much during the meeting, which consisted mostly of
Ereinion, Elrond, and Celeborn being at odds which each other. They all blamed
each other for what had happened to my father.”
“A misunderstanding led to
your father’s death,” Erestor said, thinking aloud. “For that, I am sorry.”
“Thank you.” Thranduil
coughed in order to clear his throat and sipped again. “I decided to draw back.
I pulled my men out of the battle and traveled home. There were only a handful
of soldiers left. That, in turn, did not sit well with Elrond, who was still
not completely convinced that my father had acted on Ereinion’s order when he
had attacked the Evil One.”
“That explains why Elrond
was so unwilling to tell me what happened.” But one question remained. “Do you
believe Elrond and Celeborn will turn you and your people away if you ask for
asylum?”
Thranduil leaned in closer
and looked into Erestor’s eyes. “There are two things that make asking for
asylum impossible, Erestor. I still believe that Elrond owes me an apology for
the way he acted back then. My father acted on Ereinion’s orders and I am not
convinced – to this very day – that Elrond has accepted that. He blames Oropher
for what happened. Secondly, I would rather die than to crawl on my knees in
front of Elrond or Celeborn. I might not have much left, but I still have my
pride.”
Erestor understood and
didn’t blame Thranduil for thinking the way he did. He would probably have
reacted the same way. “I agree with you that Elrond is in the wrong. He should
reach out to you.”
“He will do not that.”
Thranduil placed his now empty tea cup onto the table.
“And
what about Celeborn?” Erestor
eyed Thranduil closely. He knew Celeborn as a kind and wise Elf-Lord who would
not turn his back on fellow Elves who were in need.
“There has been no
communication between the Golden Wood and the
Yes, Erestor knew now, but
that didn’t mean he was going to simply accept their situation. He was already
trying to think of a way to solve Thranduil’s problem.
~~~
Later that evening after
Legolas and Erestor had gone to bed, Thranduil’s tale still occupied Erestor’s
mind. “You are thinking about the things my father told you,” Legolas said.
They had cuddled up to each other under the blanket and slung their arms around
each other. They wore their leggings and Legolas was content to let Erestor initiate
the next step. Erestor would tell him when he was ready to try something new.
For now, they only kissed and touched.
“Legolas, do you think
there might be a way to start communication going between the Golden Wood and
the
“Someone has to make the
first move and I know it will not be my father. And I agree with him. Oropher
did nothing wrong. He was a victim of misunderstandings.” Legolas rubbed his
cheek against Erestor’s shoulder and cuddled up closer. Erestor’s raven hair
was becoming entwined with his fair strands, but he didn’t mind one bit. The
braids were gone and both Elves enjoyed having their hair loose.
“Maybe we could send a
letter to Celeborn? Unsigned…anonymous… Maybe it would make Celeborn consider
and reach out to Thranduil? I know Celeborn: he will want to reach out once he
knows about Thranduil’s situation.”
Legolas considered
Erestor’s proposal. “My father will be cross with us when he finds out. We
should wait at any rate. He just told us and the memories are back on the
surface. He needs time to deal with them. Maybe in another month…or two…we can
make our move.” He liked Erestor’s idea.
Erestor smiled and moved
his fingertips up and down Legolas’ bare back. He loved the way the skin felt
beneath his tips. “Legolas, the more I learn about you and your people, the
deeper I come to care for you.” Legolas raised his head and gave Erestor a
puzzled look. “You are a proud people. You have known great pain and yet you
persevered. I admire that.” Erestor raised his other hand and touched Legolas’
lips. “Yesterday, you told me that you are falling in love with me and I
believe the same thing is happening to me now.”
Legolas smiled brilliantly
and kissed Erestor on the lips. The kiss deepened as Erestor’s lips and teeth
parted and, for the first time, Legolas tasted his lover fully. Erestor placed
everything he was into the kiss and didn’t hold back. An image of Glorfindel
which tried to surface in his mind was ruthlessly squashed. He was with Legolas
now. Legolas was his lover and there was no more room for Glorfindel.
The kiss ended much too
soon, but both Elves had run out of breath and needed to break it off. A warm
smile graced Legolas’ features and Erestor knew he would come to care deeply
for the fair Elf. Legolas was a part of his future and had replaced Glorfindel,
who no longer had a place in it.
~~~
The next day, Erestor
joined Legolas on another patrol. He had mastered using the hand signals and
could easily communicate with the members of the patrol. He fit in like he had
always lived in Mirkwood.
Legolas, who was walking
up front and leading the patrol, raised a hand and signaled to the rest that he
had caught sight of a spider. It was a solitary spider and no other creatures
were in sight. His eyes sought out Erestor’s. This would be the other Elf’s test.
Take him out, Legolas signaled to Erestor. Remember what I taught you.
Adrenaline rushed through
Erestor’s veins and he made his choice to use his bow and not his knives on the
spider. Legolas had told him to never take any unnecessary risks and exposing
himself to the spider would be a foolish thing to do.
Erestor moved forward and
saw a real spider for the very first time. The hairy, eight-legged monster
moved without making much sound and only a trained Elf like Legolas would know
what to look out for. Erestor realized he had made the right decision not to
fight the spider face to face when he saw the sheer size of it. Life was
precious in the
Legolas approved of the
decisions Erestor had made so far. Taking the spider out with bow and arrow was
the smart thing to do and didn’t endanger the safety of the patrol members.
Involuntarily he held his breath as the arrow approached the spider. Would it
hit its target?
It did. The spider
screeched in alarm and swayed. Erestor didn’t waver and immediately released a
second and then a third arrow to make certain the spider died. The creature
collapsed into itself, its long, hairy legs moving wildly before the eyes
closed.
“You did well,” Legolas
said once he was certain that the spider was dead. “You made all the right
decisions.” Erestor nodded his head once. All of his decisions had come
naturally to him. Instinctively, he had known what to do. Legolas felt proud
that Erestor had proven his worth. From this moment on, Erestor would be
counted as a Mirkwood Elf.
~~~
“My son tells me that you
took out two spiders today. Well done!” Thranduil, feeling they should
celebrate the joyous event, had brought out a bottle of wine. He poured the red
liquid into some goblets and handed one to Erestor and the other to Legolas.
Raising his own goblet, he toasted, “Here is to Erestor! May he slay many more spiders!” Legolas chuckled and sipped his wine, contrary to
his father, who downed the wine in one go.
Erestor sipped as well. A
huge grin lay on his face. It felt good, being accepted and appreciated. “I
could not have done so without Legolas’ teachings. He prepared me and kept me
from making mistakes.”
“Occasionally there are
foolish youngsters who want to prove their worth by taking them on with their
sword. Those are the ones who endanger the whole patrol and are not allowed to
venture out until they have learned more caution.” Thranduil smiled at Erestor.
He was truly warming up to the younger Elf. “Are you certain you hail from
Imladris? You could have been born and raised here!”
Erestor realized that
Thranduil had just paid him a major compliment and smiled. “I feel like I am a
Mirkwood Elf.” Erestor’s answer greatly pleased Thranduil and for the first
time, he realized that Legolas had chosen well indeed when he had taken Erestor
as his lover.
~~~
“Legolas?” Erestor turned around and gave the flaxen-haired
Elf a thoughtful look. They had returned to Legolas’ rooms and were in the
process of taking their shirts off.
“What is it, Erestor?”
Legolas dropped the shirt onto the floor and then removed his boots. If Erestor
left his leggings in place, he would do the same.
“I want more than just
kisses tonight. Is that fine with you?” Erestor had come to the conclusion that
he had chosen the perfect teacher to help him discover his body. Legolas was
considerate, gentle, and, although equally inexperienced when it came down to
doing the deed himself, much less inhibited and much more willing to try new
things. It was a comforting thought that their first time would be with each
other.
“That is perfectly fine
with me.” Legolas then removed his leggings and dropped them next to his shirt.
Erestor had seen him naked before, but only for a few seconds and Legolas had
no problems with being studied. “Are you going to remove yours as well?” he
asked as he pointed at Erestor’s brown leggings.
Erestor blushed
a bit, but then stepped out of his leggings. Naked, he fought the urge to cover
himself up. He lowered his gaze and his hair, which had been freed of the
constricting braids, tumbled in front of his face. “I am nervous.”
Legolas marveled about the
other Elf. “There is nothing to be ashamed of,” he answered as he sensed the
anxiety which was rushing through Erestor. “Why do you think you need to hide?”
Erestor peeked at Legolas
through the strands of his hair. “It is different for me.” The words to explain
his unease to Legolas wouldn’t come and he lowered his gaze again. He didn’t
want to tell Legolas about the abuse he had suffered as a child. That would
change their relationship and cause Legolas to treat him differently. He knew
that because Elrond and Glorfindel had treated him differently. “I am shy,” he
said in the end. “I need you to take the lead and to be gentle with me.” One
thing Legolas and he had *down* was communicating their feelings to each other.
Legolas walked toward
Erestor until he was close enough to touch the timid Elf. “I promise I will be
gentle with you,” he said, relieved that Erestor wanted to take this step. He
didn’t know what was causing the odd behavior, but he would be as careful as he
possibly could. Legolas raised a hand and brushed Erestor’s raven strands
behind his ears. “I want to see your face, Erestor.”
Erestor raised his eyes
and shyly looked into Legolas’. He even managed a smile. “I want this,” he stated,
reassuring himself and Legolas as well. “I am just nervous.”
Legolas wondered if there
wasn’t more to Erestor’s shivers than the other Elf was telling him. “I am
going to kiss and touch you, but I will not do anything you are not ready for.”
Hearing that reassured Erestor and he moved closer toward Legolas into the
embrace the fair-haired Elf was now bestowing on him. “You can touch me in
turn, you know,” Legolas added as he kept his tone and his touches light.
“I need to build more
courage before I feel comfortable doing that.” Erestor gave his lover an
apologetic look. He was grateful that Legolas’ upbringing enabled the Mirkwood
Elf to guide him through this.
Legolas leaned in closer
and took Erestor’s lips in a gentle, but still passionate kiss. At the same
time, he led his fingertips caress Erestor’s back, shoulders, and neck. He took
a moment to massage the tense muscles there and then ended the kiss. Erestor’s
face was flustered and the raven-haired Elf trembled in his arms. “I love you,
Erestor, and I will be gentle with you. Keep talking to me. Do not shut down.”
“I do not know what to
say.” Erestor felt anxious and giggly at the same time.
Legolas guided Erestor
over to the bed where they lay down, wrapped up in each other’s arms. The
kissing continued and Legolas began to roll Erestor onto his back. The moment
Erestor was on his back, Legolas straddled his lover’s hips and smiled
wickedly. “I am going to feast on your body.”
Erestor didn’t know how to
react. He felt frozen, but at the same time one part of his body was very much
awake and erect. These emotions tore him up inside and he didn’t know if he
should fight Legolas or surrender to him. Realizing he needed to stop Erestor
from panicking, Legolas kissed Erestor’s already bruised lips. His lips then
trailed down the throat, kissing and playfully nipping at the skin. Erestor
began to relax beneath him and Legolas let his instincts guide him. Thranduil
had told him that he would know what to do, where to touch, how to please, and
all of that was happening right now. He dragged his fingertips up and down
Erestor’s chest and watched Erestor’s reaction closely.
Erestor felt on fire. His
body reacted to each of Legolas’ touches and he arched his back when his
lover’s lips descended lower. “What are you doing?” He raised his head and
stared at Legolas in wonder. The other Elf was a sparkling vision above him as
those fingertips did amazing things to him coupled with the exquisite sensation
those soft lips awoke on his skin!
“You tremble at my every
touch,” Legolas whispered seductively. He threw back his head and gave Erestor
an impish look. “I want to make you come. Will you allow me to do so?”
It took Erestor a moment
to realize what Legolas was exactly asking him. “You want to touch me down
there?”
Legolas chuckled and once
more wondered about Elrond’s view on sexuality, which the half-Elf had
ingrained on Erestor. “I want to do more than touch. I want to taste you.”
Had Erestor not been in
the impending throes of ecstasy, he might have objected, but his body screamed
for some sort of release. “Legolas, I do not want you to do anything that you
might find appalling.”
“Appalling?” Legolas
frowned. “Why would I find the act appalling?” Just what did Erestor think
making love was all about? “Let me show you?”
Putting his trust in
Legolas was hard on Erestor, but in the end, he nodded his head. “Show me
then.” The next moment, Legolas kissed his abdomen and the long hair moved
sensually against his skin, causing Erestor to moan and thrust upward. He loved
the way Legolas’ hair moved against his skin and he buried his fingers in the
blond mane. “Legolas, I…” He didn’t know what was about to happen, but he felt
like he was about to faint. His body was changing, gearing up for some event he
still had to find out about and he didn’t know what to do.
Fortunately, Legolas did.
Growing up in the caves, where there was at times little privacy had taught him
a lot where making love was concerned. He had watched many times how guards had
brought each other to orgasm, either with their hands or mouths. And although
this was the first time he was performing this act he felt perfectly
comfortable doing it. It felt right – it felt natural to wrap his lips around
Erestor’s weeping flesh.
Erestor reacted by raising
his hips and uttered a guttural growl. He had never expected Legolas to do that
and the sweet sensation caused him to climax. The sensation started deep within
his stomach and his whole body seemed to explode with fire. Waves of ecstasy
swept through him and he fisted Legolas’ hair, unwittingly tugging it harshly.
Nothing could have prepared him for the divine sensation when he finally
experienced that special release brought on by Legolas’ lips.
Legolas was equally
surprised when Erestor came almost instantly. When he had watched the soldiers
perform this act, they had lasted much longer. But he hadn’t taken into
consideration that Erestor’s body was as taunt as a bowstring and had craved
this release for months. A slightly salty creamy substance dripped down his
throat and he swallowed the precious droplets. Once Erestor had stopped
trembling, and the semen had stopped dripping, he released the softening flesh
and grinned at Erestor.
Erestor was staring at the
ceiling and trying hard to grasp what had just happened. His body sung a melody
he had never heard before and his fingers spasmodically wrapped and unwrapped
themselves around flaxen strands. Due to the grasp which Erestor still had on
his hair, Legolas’ movements were limited, but he still managed to study
Erestor’s relaxed expression. “You needed that.”
Legolas’ voice brought
Erestor out of his blissful state and he raised his head to look at that impish
Elf who had done this incredible thing to him. “I did not know it would be like
that,” he whispered in a gentle voice. Legolas merely grinned. He didn’t really
feel the need to discuss this. Erestor let go of his hair and Legolas stretched
out onto his side next to Erestor. He placed a hand on Erestor’s heaving chest
and waited for his lover to compose himself.
A few minutes later,
Erestor finally stirred. Turning his head toward Legolas, he said, “Did you…?”
One look at Legolas’ groin told him that his lover hadn’t reached orgasm yet. He
felt shy again, realizing he was in no way ready to bring Legolas to orgasm in
the same way. It was an act which he had been forced to perform in his
childhood and it would take a while before Legolas’ loving care would dim the
memories. “I want to make you feel the same way,” he said and rolled onto his
side as well. Face to face, Legolas seemed radiant to Erestor’s eyes.
Legolas let Erestor set
the pace and didn’t pressure his lover. When Erestor cautiously wrapped his
fingers around his hard flesh, he smiled and sighed deeply. “That feels good.”
It did. Until now, it had been his own hand bringing him release and now –
finally – someone else was doing so. “Kiss me?” Erestor inched closer and,
while stroking Legolas’ erection, took possession of his lover’s lips. The
sensation of feeling Legolas moan into his mouth was breathtaking and he
doubled his efforts to please the other Elf. Legolas wrapped his arms around
Erestor and thrust into his lover’s hand with wild abandon while he suckled on
Erestor’s bottom lip. Staring into Erestor’s eyes, he maintained the eye
contact at all times.
It was how Erestor knew
that Legolas was finally approaching orgasm. The pupils dilated and the color
shifted to midnight-blue. A moment later, Legolas shook in his arms and Erestor
soothed his lover by deepening the kiss. Warm cream dripped onto his hand and
he slowed down his strokes, eventually coming to a halt. Unable to withstand
his curiosity, he broke eye contact and watched how Legolas’ semen dripped from
the slit. Legolas grew lax in his arms and Erestor gently lowered his lover
onto his back. He rested his head against one of Legolas’ shoulders and smiled contentedly.
“You liked that.” He was relieved that he had done everything right.
“Aye, I did…” Legolas’
breathing was still too fast and he fought to calm it again. “Erestor… that
was…” He lacked the words to adequately describe the sensations coursing
through him.
“Amazing,” Erestor
finished for him, cocking his head in such a way that he could look at Legolas’
face. “I was afraid before we started,” he admitted. “And although I will
probably be nervous the next time as well, I am no longer scared.”
“That is good,” Legolas
purred, satiated. He stroked the raven hair and smiled. He was happy for both
of them that everything had gone well.
~~~
The next day, Legolas
visited with his father again. He found Thranduil in the hot pool and sat on
the stone floor, still fully clothed, and watched how his father’s green eyes
opened to acknowledge him.
Thranduil immediately
noticed the change that had come over his son. Legolas exuded happiness and
contentment and the bruised lips gave away what had happened between Erestor
and his son last night. What *did* surprise him was that Legolas was there with
him and not with Erestor.
“Adar, can I discuss
something personal with you?” Legolas removed his boots and socks, rolled up
his leggings and lowered his feet into the warm water. He sighed when the
soothing sensation traveled up his legs.
“Always,
my son. You should know that.”
Thranduil felt a bit worried and hoped his worries would prove ungrounded.
“Erestor and I took the
next step last night. We explored our bodies.” Legolas cocked his head and
tried to find the right words. “We brought each other to orgasm.” Thranduil
nodded and patiently waited for Legolas to continue. “I liked it a lot, but I
was wondering…” Legolas frowned, trying to put his question into words. “How do
we know what to do when the time comes to go all the way? How do we know who
will take whom?”
Thranduil coughed.
Although he had raised Legolas to always come to him with his questions, he had
dreaded this day. He wasn’t good at explaining intimate matters like that.
“Before we address that…do you know the mechanics? Do you know what to do when
you make love with him?”
Legolas smiled. “I know
about preparation and the use of oil, Adar. I learned that some time ago. It is
hard not to learn things like that when our fellows are performing the act just
a few feet away from you!”
All right that answered
one question, Thranduil figured. Now he had to tackle the next. “What would you
prefer Legolas: to be on top or on the receiving end?”
Legolas shrugged his
shoulders. “Both ways appeal to me.”
“And did you discuss this
with Erestor yet?”
Legolas shook his head.
“Not yet. I wanted to talk to you first.”
“Legolas, no matter what
role you decide to take in your love play, always make certain that the Elf on
the receiving end is prepared. Never rush preparing him.”
“Or else the Elf on the
receiving end could be injured. I know that, Adar.” Legolas grinned.
“I suggest you discuss the
matter with Erestor. He might be wrestling with the same question, or maybe he
already knows what he wants. Talk to him, Legolas.”
“Your advice is sound,
Adar. It always is.” Legolas pulled his feet out of the water, dried them off,
and put his socks and boots back on. “You are right. I will talk to him.”
~~~
Erestor had made Mirkwood
his home in every sense of the word. He had befriended a large number of the Elves,
had become a steady member of their patrols, and was well-liked. The Mirkwood
Elves had accepted that he was Legolas’ lover now and that earned him
additional respect for they could see that their Crown Prince was happier now
than he had ever been before.
Almost three months had
passed by since he had arrived in the
Right now, he was just
happy. No one treated him any different because of his past and, for the first
time in his life, he felt ‘normal’ as one of the Elves that lived down there in
the caves.
The most important reason
why he felt happy was of course Legolas. The flaxen-haired Elf was the lover he
had always dreamt of. Legolas was kind, gentle, understanding, but there was
always a wicked edge to him that kept Erestor alert. Erestor had grown more
eager to participate and occasionally he took the lead in their love play. But
so far, they had restricted themselves to non-invasive ways to bring each other
to orgasm.
And that was exactly the
thing that had begun to worry Erestor. He was aware of the fact that Legolas
was holding back. Legolas wanted more...wanted to take the next step, but it
was because he judged Erestor not ready that they had stopped moving forward.
It was time he took that last hurdle and became Legolas’ lover in every sense
of the word.
Legolas found Erestor
brooding on the subject while seated on their bed, petting their cat. “I talked
to my father just now,” Legolas said as he seated himself behind Erestor.
Erestor moved backwards
and rested his back against Legolas’ chest, savoring the feeling of his lover’s
arms and legs wrapping around him. “What did the two of you talk about?”
“Us,” Legolas replied
honestly. “I am of two minds about this. I want us to share ourselves fully,
but like you, I have no experience doing the actual deed.”
“I know what must be
done,” Erestor said as he searched for the right words. “And I think I am ready
to take that step, but…” Erestor moved forward, wanting to break away from
Legolas’ embrace, but his lover held him tightly, preventing him from putting
the extra distance between them. “But I can not be on the receiving end. Not
yet.”
Legolas accepted Erestor’s
admission and didn’t question it. He contributed it to Erestor’s lacking
education where the physical aspect was concerned. “I do not mind being on the
receiving end, Erestor.” In order to prove to Erestor that he really didn’t mind,
he kissed along the nape of Erestor’s neck.
Erestor looked at Legolas
from over his shoulder. For one terrible moment he wanted to blurt out the
truth that he had been abused as a child and therefore could not be on the
bottom, but then his lips froze. He didn’t want Legolas to treat him
differently or to look at him with pity in those light-blue eyes. “I need to do
this in small steps.”
“You do not have to
explain yourself to me,” Legolas soothed. “I love you and want what is best for
you.” Not for the first time was he glad that they were able to openly discuss
their feelings.
Erestor eased himself
against Legolas’ chest again. “I really love you, Legolas.” He did.
Glorfindel’s image had faded and Legolas’ had replaced it.
~~~
Erestor felt more nervous
than he wanted Legolas to know. They had decided that that night should be
*the* night, and Legolas had made all necessary preparations to ensure that
everything would go smoothly. “Where did you find the scented candles?”
Erestor’s feelings for Legolas had deepened further the moment he had entered
the candle-lit bedroom.
“I found some in my
father’s rooms. Let us hope he does not miss them.” Legolas had put on fresh
bed linens, placed the vial with oil on the floor next to the bed, and had even
ventured outside to gather the few blooming flowers Mirkwood still had to
offer.
Erestor raised his arms
and cupped Legolas’ face in them. The eyes that looked back at him were full of
love, but the grin that rested on Legolas’ face told of mischief. “Take the
lead tonight?” he requested softly.
“If that is what you
desire, I will do that.” They hadn’t bothered to dress in their normal gear
after exiting the pool and had only wrapped a morning robe around their frames.
Legolas undid the sash that held Erestor’s in place and parted the fabric to
reveal his lover’s naked form to him. “You are perfect.” Leaning in closer, he
touched his lips to Erestor’s and wrapped his arms around his lover before
lowering the raven-haired Elf onto the bed. “I thank the Valar for sending you
my way.”
Erestor’s hands trembled as
they did away with Legolas’ morning robe. He pushed the fabric out of his way
and ran his fingers down Legolas’ back. He had become quite familiar with his
lover’s most sensitive spots and enjoyed caressing, teasing, and squeezing the
soft flesh in all the right places. In the end, his hands ended up cupping
Legolas’ firm buttocks. They had never gone this far and Erestor trembled with
excitement that they were finally going all the way. “I want to know you in
that way, Legolas.”
“You will…just be patient, my love.” Legolas straddled Erestor’s waist and
placed his hands against Erestor’s chest. For a long moment, he didn’t talk,
move, or blink. He simply studied Erestor and then judged him ready. He reached
for the vial with oil, uncapped it, and reached for Erestor’s right hand. “You
know what to do,” he whispered while letting the oil drizzle down Erestor’s
fingers.
Erestor needed a moment to
convince himself that this was really happening. He drew in a deep breath and
reached under Legolas, who was squatting on top of him. He parted the mounds of
flesh and found the entrance to his lover’s body. Gently, slowly, he pushed
past the ring of muscle and into the warm glove. “Are you certain it will fit?
It feels so tight in there.”
Legolas laughed and
Erestor sucked in his breath as he felt the muscles tighten around his finger. “I
am certain of that.” Legolas closed his eyes and concentrated on the feelings
that the penetration brought with it. “I like the way that feels.” Encouraged,
Erestor removed his finger, let Legolas add more oil, and then returned with
two. Since Legolas was squatting, he could pull away if the invasion became
painful or push down to intensify the feeling. They had chosen this position on
purpose for it would allow Legolas to be in control as well. “Move them about,”
Legolas requested. “You know what you are looking for.”
Erestor nodded: that
special spot in Legolas’ passage that would catapult his lover to ecstasy when
the right time came. He wiggled about, trying to find his way in there. Legolas’
eyes widened and he threw back his head while he moaned. “That is it! Right there!” Erestor had found his target!
Erestor rubbed the little
nub again and delighted in how it made Legolas squirm. “Like that?”
“Aye, like that…” Legolas’
breathing had sped up and he now gave Erestor a concerned look. “Pull out or I
will come.” He was too close – the sensation had been too good.
Feeling breathless,
Erestor did as Legolas requested. He then raised his other hand and cupped
Legolas’ cheek in it. “Are you ready?” Preparing Legolas for what was about to
follow had excited him further and he was painfully hard.
Legolas nodded. “I am
ready.” He moved, positioned himself above his lover’s hard flesh and then
placed his hands back onto Erestor’s chest. Slowly while biting his bottom lip,
he began to lower himself.
Erestor quickly wrapped
his fingers around his shaft and held still as he felt Legolas open up for him.
He slid his hands beneath his lover’s buttocks and supported him that way. “Go
slowly!”
“I am!” Legolas, nervous,
excited, and somewhat apprehensive as well, focused on the task at hand. He
gasped the moment the head of Erestor’s member pushed past the ring of muscle
and into his body. With big eyes, he looked into Erestor’s gaze. Nothing could
have quite prepared him for the way it felt to receive Erestor that way.
“Does it hurt?” Erestor
would stop the moment Legolas was in pain!
“It does not, now be quiet!”
Legolas hissed the words through clenched teeth and proceeded to lower himself
further. The fact that he was in charge helped and he paused whenever the
invasion began to border on being painful. It took him a minute or two to fully
take Erestor, but then his buttocks made contact with Erestor’s lap.
Not thrusting upward into
that tight heat took most of Erestor’s control, but he managed to stay still.
He still remembered what it was like to be in pain like that and he barely
dared to draw in his next breath. That was until Legolas released a moan and
pushed down. They were finally fully joined: their bodies were locked together
and had become one. “I told you it would fit,” Legolas said once he had caught
his breath. “How does it feel for you?”
“It is beyond words,”
Erestor whispered the admission in between shedding tears of happiness and
caressing Legolas’ face.
“Having you lodged inside
me feels…not unpleasant,” Legolas said, trying to find the right words. “I feel
full.”
“Maybe it will become
better if we moved?” Erestor was still afraid to thrust or make any sudden
movements. He wanted Legolas to tell him what to do next.
“Sounds like a good idea,
my love.” Legolas was once more in control and reached for Erestor’s hands.
Entwining their fingers, he used them as a way to support himself as he raised
himself again. The friction caused by that movement almost made Erestor come,
but he managed to calm himself down. He didn’t want to come just yet! He wanted
Legolas to come with him! That friction also caused a fire deep inside Legolas’
lower body and he had to still himself for fear he might come at that very
moment. “It is too intense. I will not last long.”
“Neither will I, love.”
Erestor wanted nothing more than to wrap his arms around Legolas and pull his
lover close, but he didn’t know if the change in position would be
uncomfortable for Legolas.
Staring deeply into
Erestor’s hooded eyes Legolas caught an echo of the thought. “You want that?”
“I want you closer than this.”
Erestor moaned as Legolas started to ride him again. “Will
not… last long…this way.” Realizing their predicament, Legolas tried to
draw out their climax by carrying out Erestor’s wish. He lowered his upper body
onto Erestor’s and purred the moment possessive arms closed around him. Their
lips locked in an arduous kiss and Erestor began to deliver short, shallow
thrusts. Legolas rocked along with Erestor’s movements and buried his fingers
in his lover’s ebony hair. They rocked together for another long minute, but
then the pressure became too much.
Erestor’s shaft continued
to nudge the sensitive spot inside his passage and Legolas came with a startled
yelp. His climax had taken him by surprise and he trembled in Erestor’s arms,
finally surrendering to the moment. Erestor’s eyes widened and fastened on
Legolas’ clouded ones. “What…is that?” Something clenched his member, causing
him to grow motionless to savor the sensation. But Legolas was in no state to
answer him. Ripples seemed to expand from his center, sweeping through his
lower body and setting his groin on fire, causing him to bury his face in
Erestor’s hair.
Unable to hold back any
longer, Erestor followed Legolas into ecstasy. A tidal wave seemed to crash in
over him, sweeping him from his feet and burying him. The sensation was too
much and his nails dug into Legolas’ buttocks. Panting hard, with a fine layer
of sweat covering their bodies, the two Elves lay entangled in each other’s
arms. They felt dazed, overwhelmed by the intimate sensation and could do
little more than moan and let the storm die down. When it eventually did,
Erestor was the first to grow aware of the fact that Legolas had collapsed in
his arms. Since his member had softened, he had no trouble gently pulling out.
He then rolled his lover onto his back to examine him. The blue eyes had closed
and the lips trembled with each breath Legolas released. “Legolas?” he whispered,
feeling concerned for his lover’s well-being.
“Give
me…one…moment…to…recover.” Legolas opened his eyes and managed a lustful smile.
“That was…intense.”
Erestor agreed. “Aye, it
was. Very intense.” He brushed the fair hair out of
Legolas’ face and studied his lover’s expression. “Did I hurt you?”
Legolas lightly shook his
head. “Nay, stop worrying. I am fine…just tired.” Legolas raised a hand and
touched it to Erestor’s lips. He trailed the outline of his lover’s lips and
then slid his fingers into Erestor’s hair. “Hold me while we sleep.” He needed
to recover.
Erestor gently pulled
Legolas into an embrace and Legolas used Erestor’s shoulder as a pillow. Cuddled
up like that, the two lovers surrendered to sleep and dreamt of their future
together.
The end
(TBC in time)